Please help - money/mortgage advice

[goodsturdygirl]

I know I should be able to find the answers to this online but I can't figure it out! I want to buy a house on my own (post separation) & all being well should have around £180k from this house. So obviously that is a decent deposit and I thought would make my situation better. However to get a small house in my area I'm looking at about 350 & I just don't see how I'm going to be able to borrow that much (170 ish). My earning are pitiful and I am absolutely up for working/earning more so am already job hunting but I don't think it will be enough. So rubbish as I'm really happy in this area and would only want somewhere small for me and my 2 kids. Am I missing something or do I just need to accept I can't afford to be here?

Are there more affordable flats? Or shared ownership?

Its hard on your own to make work and childcare work and really pay enough to get a mortgage. Will you be getting child support? How old are DC/do they need childcare? Will they be spending time with their father and could you work more then? How much do you actually earn?

I know you say you like where you live, but is there any chance of moving? There's plenty of places where you could buy a 3 bed house in a nice area (well maybe not Mumsnet nice, but perfectly fine, not rough) for your £180k or not much more, so you could buy outright, or have a tiny mortgage and have a much better standard of living and not spend most of your savings on rent over the next 10/15 years.

I know it makes sense to just move. Just struggling to accept it as we are happy and settled here. Kids are 7 & 10. I earn about £800 a month atm - can increase hours but will still be low paid work, at least for now.

Maybe I could move out of the area but still close enough that we could drive to school, at least that's something!

Sorry, but I don't think earning £800 a month is enough for a mortgage. You need to increase your hours, although I guess that will bring the cost of childcare up.

Your 180k is more than enough to buy a house in parts of the UK, just not where you are. But relocating is a massive change for everyone.

Have you spoken with a mortgage advisor to see what they can do for you? Many are fee-free

I currently only work 3 days & can find work during school hours on my 2 days off which means I can still drop off/pick up but that's only going to be about £350 extra a month. Long term I obviously hope to earn more it's not going to happen overnight. Naively had the attitude that partner is highly paid so I can work in a job that suits family life but doesn't pay well 😕

How much child maintenance will you be getting?

I think you and I are in exactly the same position financially OP, in that our figures are the same. I own my house, have £180k equity (minimum) to use as a deposit on a new place and would like to move within the same area where houses start at £350k.

I can't because I'm a 'mortgage prisoner'. I wouldn't pass the affordability checks for the mortgage I currently have even though I've never missed a payment, which means we either have to stay here or move away to cheaper area and buy a house that requires a much smaller mortgage. I earn a bit more than you (c. £1200 a month) and a mortgage broker says the absolute max I could borrow is £90k which means I have a total budget of £270k.

Could you find a job to do at home in the evenings OP to up your income?

I'm a single parent and teach at home after school 3 days a week and in the evenings.

I don't know. We are in very early stages so still trying to make the separation happen. I don't want to talk to him about money because he is 'concerned' about how I will make ends meet and how this will impact 'the childrens welfare'. I mean I will make sure the kids are ok no matter what but he obviously knows I don't earn much so is using that against me. He earns more than I earn in a year in 1 month - but we are completely separate financially. I have never asked him for money - the only thing he pays for are mortgage & bills. I pay for groceries, kids stuff, my car etc. So I'm not going to be going from a lavish lifestyle to nothing. It's just housing that I need to figure out.

@INeedNewShoes I'm sure I can - I have a few different options so will do what I can/when I can but none of them will be big earners. Think I just needs to play it safe and get something with no mortgage or v small mortgage until I'm back on my feet.

... also just to clarify the money I put into the house was all my own - I haven't made money from him. The only profit is a little bit from increased value.

With that income difference wouldn’t it be more fair for you to stay in the family house until the kids leave education? Obviously I have no idea of equity/deposits etc.

I don't know @Brogues, probably. I suppose I'm flapping a bit, thinking I need a clean break asap or it won't happen. For context this is not a one sided split - it has been coming for a long long time but I'm the one making the move. My partner has been unhappy for a long time and been very vocal about it but he obviously expected me to stay put and deal with it because he seems shocked this is actually going ahead.

Is he DC dad? Are you married?

Yes he's Dad. No we're not married.

Well it's been confirmed - I'm too poor for a mortgage! & rent is a lot these days isn't it?!! I will just buy a small house in a less fancy area with the money I've got & go from there. Onwards and upwards!