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Brother draining me mentally

2 replies

username39583 · 08/05/2022 10:54

DB has had a rough few years split with his partner, sharing custody of his children, in a mess with huge amounts of debt etc. All my family have been there for him in particular my sister who has been giving him a lot money.
It has now got to the point though where I feel drained every time I see him. He rings almost daily aswell. He is constantly hinting about how poor he is I think he is hoping I will also give him money (I am in no position to and if I did it would be taking from my DC). Every day there is a drama with his ex that I often think it partially his fault. He does nothing to sort out his financial problems in fact I believe he is now in even more debt. Every time my sister/parents have given him money he goes out with his friends. He keeps saying he will get a debt management agreement but it could affect him renting a house. My sister is already a guarantor on his current house he is renting.
I think my anxiety is I can see this building up and getting worse. If he stops paying his rent I can see him turning up on my doorstep. We have never had the best relationship I almost feel it is now forced because we are sister and brother. When he was with his ex I only saw him afew times a year.
I don't even know what I am asking. I suppose I needed to rant and get it out. I feel drained after the last 3 years of him and his never ending issues.

OP posts:
Aquamarine1029 · 08/05/2022 10:58

Time to take a massive step back, and if I were you, I'd tell him why. You simply can't deal with all of his self inflicted bullshit and drama. Put yourself first and disengage from him. Sadly, your sister has really gotten herself into a mess helping him out.

Georgeskitchen · 08/05/2022 11:32

Step away
Nobody is helping him by dishing out money. When he's on the streets maybe that will be the wake up call he needs

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