Would you want a close friend working for you?

[WoodenClock]

Generally, I keep work and social pretty separate. I have work friends who I get on with at work and socialise with at work events, but they rarely cross over into my homelife.

This seemed entirely normal for 25 years, as I and my colleagues had long commutes and didn't live near each other so it was how everyone lived.

Now I work much closer to home and no one has a long commute. There are lots of "real" friendships among the staff, although I still prefer to keep things separate. I have the kind of role that often means taking difficult decisions that affect staff and it's easier if you're not too close to anyone.

Anyway, I have a vacancy to fill. For various reasons it's not an easy vacancy to fill. IMO it's underpaid, but it's on a public sector payscale and I can't do anything about that.

I have a friend who is interested. He'd be a strong candidate and I'd be pleased to have him on the team - if only he wasn't my friend. He has has skills and his personality would fit very well. If I have a concern it's that I think he can be quite militant at work, but I consider we are fair employers and I don't object to challenge, so that would be manageable.

I don't want to have difficulties at work or to affect things out of work. Have you ever employed a good friend? How did it work out. He's a significant member of my most important friendship group, so I have a lot to lose of it goes horribly wrong.

I wouldn't go there. If you value your friendship then keep him as a friend. Resentments can arise between friends when one is an employer and the other an employee. The difference in status can make problems hard to mention and hard to deal with. Different if an employee/er becomes a good friend as the hierarchy is established beforehand.

I absolutely never mix business and friendship its a recipe for disaster.

Not quite the same situation, but one of my team is a very good friend (we originally met through work, she left the company and then came back into my team).

Likewise we have a lot of mutual friends outside of work now, live in a small place so lots of crossover in social groups.

I can only say that it works fine for us, but I'm extremely lucky that she's a brilliant team player and hard worker. We've never had to broach discipline or anything because it's not been required and I can't imagine a situation where it would be that wasn't wildly out of character.

I make efforts to keep thing very professional in terms of appraisals, time off, company policies etc, and now we have a 3rd member of our team we have both dialled down the 'friendship' in work time so as not to exclude her.

Absolutely not. 100%. Same with family.

Don't do it OP. Mixing business and friendship never ends well. I have experience of this and it had a very messy ending.

Yes, I'm not really sure how I avoid it though. If he applies he'll be a strong candidate and there won't be a large pool. I'll have to withdraw from the selection panel, but I'd expect him to do well.

I got a job at a friend's office once, through the friend, but it was a lot less comfortable than I'd expected. Do not recommend.

Not in a million years

Nope. I have lost a good friend this way.

Not ideal but sounds unavoidable if he’s interested in the role and has good chance of getting it.

Urgh, I've been here more than once and would do everything possible to avoid it happening again.

They stop just being a friend at that point and there's absolutely nothing you can do about the inevitable shift in dynamic.

Hell no.

Done it, it was one of the biggest mistakes in my life. Cost me my career in the end.