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Original poster

DS not going to school

22 replies

cuppateaandabiccie · 06/05/2022 10:10

DS is due to sit his GCSEs in the next few weeks and he will be getting study leave within the next week or two.

He is adamant that today will be his “last day of school this academic year” and that after today, he will not be going in except to sit his exams or to attend a study class when he is on official study leave.

he says teaching is pretty much finished now and that all they are doing in class now is revision and past papers which is something he says is easy to do in the comfort of his own home and that he is more productive at home.

I have told him that I disagree because I do think he should still attend school right up until they release him on study leave, but then on the other hand if he does work hard at home and does what he says he will do, I don’t have a problem with it really.

I can’t physically force him to go in, if he does choose to stay at home then I guess I will just have to ring the school and say he’s chosen to take unofficial study leave.

WWYD?

OP posts:
Cauliflowersqueeze · 06/05/2022 10:12

Tell him he has to go to school and that they are creating revision sessions specifically for his exams. If the school thought his revision was better than specialist teachers training the students specifically for these exams they would tell them all to stay at home. There’s really no grey area on this.

Ohdoleavemealone · 06/05/2022 10:13

Is he usually quite hard working? If he is then leave him to it. If he is more likely to be on xbox then I'd push for school.

Ohdoleavemealone · 06/05/2022 10:14

All I would say is that when I did my Alevels, the last few weeks of revision in school included alot of mock questions. Some of them actually came up in the exam!

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Imsittinginthekitchensink · 06/05/2022 10:15

I would get him to ring the school and let them know himself. He thinks he knows it all, he can take responsibility for his decisions.

CloudSharkie · 06/05/2022 10:16

I didn't go to school after term break - I was at a boarding school and was deemed "too thick" and predicted a U only... I self taught myself the curriculum basically and ended up with amazing grades.

But I was determined and worked by ass off well before that. I had to work out a way to figure out my own strategies that worked - it paid off.

So, depends on your son. Is he motivated?

Original poster
cuppateaandabiccie · 06/05/2022 10:17

I have told him the school may consider it an unauthorised absence and that they could very well sanction him for it and he said he doesn’t care and that they should be glad he will be working from home!

i despair!

OP posts:
Original poster
cuppateaandabiccie · 06/05/2022 10:19

CloudSharkie · 06/05/2022 10:16

I didn't go to school after term break - I was at a boarding school and was deemed "too thick" and predicted a U only... I self taught myself the curriculum basically and ended up with amazing grades.

But I was determined and worked by ass off well before that. I had to work out a way to figure out my own strategies that worked - it paid off.

So, depends on your son. Is he motivated?

i would say he is motivated, yes.

i have no doubt he would work hard at home, but I’m worried him missing school means he might miss vital information!

OP posts:
redskyatnight · 06/05/2022 10:27

I think this is really tricky. My DD's study leave doesn't start until after her 6th exam, and she is definitely the sort of child that will work better at home than in school revision sessions ... but unfortunately I think this comes under the category of sometimes having to do things that you would rather not which is a life lesson. I'm sure OP's DC (and my DD) will still get something out of the school revision session that they won't at home. Apart from anything else, I'm thinking it's better that they keep a bit of normality going as long as possible - once exam season starts fully, it will be relentless exam, revise, repeat, with few breaks for anything else.

Original poster
cuppateaandabiccie · 06/05/2022 10:28

Oh dear. He has just sent me a text message from school to say he will be leaving school at half 11 today as his teacher isn’t in for one of his classes this afternoon and then in the other classes they won’t be doing anything.

he expects me to pick him up but I’m not coming to pick up until the scheduled finish time this afternoon

OP posts:
underneaththeash · 06/05/2022 10:28

Will it affect his chances of getting into sixth form? When is he supposed to be on study leave?
I sort of agree with him. DS is at the same stage and is considerably more productive at home. They keep covering stuff in class that he already knows. Our plan is that next Monday is his last day. But I’ll be around to supervise.

CloudSharkie · 06/05/2022 10:42

He should already have all the practice papers etc. by now - does he?

It's a bit late in the day for them to have not received them.

Hallyup89 · 06/05/2022 10:44

Can he just walk out of school today? Ours are all locked in. You do right not to pick him up though, and I'd also phone school telling them he's intending to leave early.

If he's adamant that he's not going back in then I understand that it's difficult to get him there. I'd let school know and remove all games consoles/computer/phone etc. and provide him with a textbook.

Cauliflowersqueeze · 06/05/2022 10:52

He actually thought you would come to school and pick him up so he can truant?!

FindingMeno · 06/05/2022 10:52

Will the school actually take any action towards you as a parent?
The thing is that during lockdowns, some kids found they could work very productively and manage their time well at home, so I really can't blame kids like that finding the last few days/weeks of school as a time waste.
They are a product of what has happened in the last couple of years!

Original poster
cuppateaandabiccie · 06/05/2022 11:08

Any time I have ever had to pick him up from school early due to sickness or a medical appointment, I had to sign a book at reception to say the time he left and why he left.

He text me and told me he will sign the book before he leaves and will write down on it he has a doctors appointment so that he gets marked on the registers as doctors appointment!

i will not be going to pick him up early today, he can make his own way home if he is doing that!

OP posts:
Original poster
cuppateaandabiccie · 06/05/2022 11:10

FindingMeno · 06/05/2022 10:52

Will the school actually take any action towards you as a parent?
The thing is that during lockdowns, some kids found they could work very productively and manage their time well at home, so I really can't blame kids like that finding the last few days/weeks of school as a time waste.
They are a product of what has happened in the last couple of years!

I’m not sure if they would or not.

if he does do this, I’d rather get it agreed with the school first! Maybe if we ask they might allow him to stay home

OP posts:
EduCated · 06/05/2022 11:10

Legally he can leave school the last Friday in June (England/Wales), and study leave does not have to be given.

I admire his audacity at thinking you will come and collect him! Oh to be 16 again. I also agree with the suggested approach that if he thinks he’s so right on this, he can be the one to tell them.

Original poster
cuppateaandabiccie · 06/05/2022 11:15

I’m not comfortable with him signing himself out of school today (it has to be a parent/grandparent etc so pupils aren’t allowed to sign themselves out)

he is also lying to them so that when the reception staff update the registers, they will see in the book that it says he’s at an appointment and mark him as authorised absence this afternoon when in fact he won’t be at a doctors appointment!

OP posts:
Cauliflowersqueeze · 06/05/2022 11:18

They will have other procedures in place than just allowing students to write “doctors appointment” and walk out the door. Otherwise they would all do that.

LouisRenault · 06/05/2022 11:34

I also agree with the suggested approach that if he thinks he’s so right on this, he can be the one to tell them.

And he takes whatever consequences the school chooses to dish out for truanting; you won't be intervening.

Perfumelover18 · 06/05/2022 11:44

I agree that he should be the one to let school know that he won't be attending. He can deal with the repercussions from that too.

He might get away with saying 'doctor's appointment' one day, but he can't have appointments every day he's absent.

Also, I'm confused, as you say that only parents and grandparents can sign a child out of school, so why does he think he can sign himself out?

Stodge · 06/05/2022 11:48

My son is also in Y11. At his school the parent has to email reception and tell them the child will be leaving early. Pupils can't just sign themselves out. And don't pick him up. Presumably he can walk/get a bus home if he chooses to leave.

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