And the saddest part is, I know I'm not alone. In fact, it's pretty much the default for everyone I know.
The enormity of this has just suddenly overwhelmed me, out of nowhere.
I am a size 8, and have generally only ever fluctuated between a size 6 and a 10. I am only 5 foot tall, but have always had big boobs- e/f cup. I have always felt my boobs are too big, and incongruous on my short figure. I've spent my entire adult life dieting, squeezing my boobs into minimiser bras, wearing baggy and shapeless t-shirts, wincing when I look in the mirror.
Some small part of my brain knows read there is nothing wrong with me, but it is by far the quietest voice in my head.
Every other woman I can think of (regardless of shape or size) has had similar mental struggles. It is almost universal, regardless of your actual body type.
There is a constant, subconscious drive to be striving towards looking different. Why? I wish so much that I could reach a point where I like myself.
My body has done me proud over a lifetime. Allowed me to do all the things that I want to. Remained reasonably healthy. Produced 2 babies 😍.
Will I ever be able to give it a break?