funny examples of when people have been extreme tightwads / tightfisted

[Sensisoul]

i recently fell out with a friend who is known for being exceptionally tight with money.

They have no kids & do anything to scrimp and save so they can afford a champagne lifestyle at the drop of a hat. They buy expensive beauty items with free gifts and then take the items back for a refund afterwards and not return the free gift!

This is a light hearted post about examples of tight friends, partners & family members who have either gone out of their way to be tight or given terrible birthday/ Christmas presents over the years.

NB- This isn’t a criticism on saving money, being mindful of money to stop hardship etc. It is great to collect coupons and vouchers and I do the same. It is more a lighthearted look at how tight some people can be:

Tell me what happened and when & is that person still in your life?

I’ll give a few examples:

this friend requests vouchers from people at Christmas
but always buys people “presents”. These presents can be anything from some old used nail varnish to free beauty samples sachets.

Their family now insist that they buy them gift vouchers as they no longer want their version of “presents”

Only orders hot water in a restaurant/bar- so drinks are always free. sometimes brings own tea bag and milk if they fancy a cup of tea.

Insists on walking everywhere and is spitting feathers when they share a taxi with anyone. They would sooner walk home on their own at night and potentially risk their own safety, than hail a cab and get home safely.

Order the most expensive luxury drink at a bar and then complain said drink is flat and that another fresh bottle is opened. They would then complain again and get another drink free!

Arrange to meet for lunch/dinner at the venue of their choice & then not order anything at all from the venue & say they are getting something from the burger van nearby afterwards. Then watch me eat my food that was ordered from the venue while they sip on a free cup of hot water. ( the hot water was free btw)

Insist on always getting a child’s portion at any eatery. whether this is chips
from a burger van or a posh restaurant.
This person always has to have the cheapest bill at the end of a meal.

Send a sympathy card when my auntie passed away & have the text in the card crossed out!! God knows what the original card said 😂

Lancashire based: For me, Spitting feathers is very thirsty, spitting blood is very angry.
To be fair, I think I'm in a minority of folks that know this 😁

I would often drive DD’s friend and her Mum when we went into town. DD would go off with her friend and I would have coffee with the mum.
The first time we went she insisted on buying for both of us whilst I waited at the table. I asked her to get me a latte which she did but ordered herself coffee, toastie and cake. Not a problem until she asked me for half the bill.
I have absolutely no idea why she thought I should pay for half of her food!

That could be me.
I went to a work meal one night, I had £20 to cover the cost.
Ordered a cheap meal, no pudding but towards the end it became clear everyone was heading on to a pub and one of the group ordered a round of shots.
I was clear when I said not to order for me as I couldn't reciprocate but they all said not a problem, they didn't mind.
At the end of the night one of the newer staff members made a big deal of saying it was my round, I was mortified.
I then started putting money aside so that on the next night out I could buy a couple of rounds to make up for it, but sadly never got the chance as that woman made life so difficult in work I left.

I would have been happy in the pub being the sad woman with one drink and water, I never asked or expected to be included in the rounds. Just being out for a change was nice.

I was working full time but on a very tight budget so that doesn't mean an awful lot.

Sold a pushchair on Ebay back in the day - it was about £300 from memory, it was about 12 months old and a couple of parts that had never been used, it was pristine. But it wasn't a "posh" or sought after brand, and I wasn't prepared to post, so it didn't get much interest and it went for the starting bid of 99p!! Cash on collection.

A man came to collect it from my house, said how lovely it was, just what he wanted for his child. Gave me a £1 coin, I said thank you. He asked for the change and waited till I went inside & came out again for the 1p.

A very senior colleague (high salary, mortgage long since paid off, close to retirement) was working from home during the pandemic. Phoned up one day and asked us to post out a notebook and some biros.

I’m on the manager’s side here too. She’s not making any profit from this, she’s just suggesting an idea that millions of workplaces use to ensure the office always has milk.

Tbh maybe I'm just crabby but in that scenario, I would have pointed out what I had already contributed and not paid anything.

I would hand her rubbish straight back to her.

My parents.
Comfortably off own house, £100’s of thousands in the bank) but live so frugally - just why?
Surely, their hard earned money is to make life as good as it can be now. It’s as if they just don’t appreciate or want nice things. An old battered car, which is so much harder to get into and drive than a newer one, an old tablet and mobile phone that causes endless frustration and means they miss out on family contact. Dad even turns the WiFi off between use.
They moan about seeing no one - but NEVER invite anyone anywhere - I’ve suggested they invite one of their grandsons for tea, or invite family members out for Sunday lunch…but no. If you call - one rich tea and a cup of tea, if I’m really lucky a white breaded, cheap processed ham sandwich. ( as against my full two course Sunday lunches).

DM has regifted me items I’ve given her - but the worst was around the time of my big birthday.
I’d arranged to see them weeks after and suggested we grabbed a very cheap and quick carvery lunch in a pub.
When the meal came my DM grandly announced
“We will get yours, as we missed your birthday” (£7.99).
( They we’re abroad for their big birthday’s - I’d bought my DF a hotel stay for them both and tickets to a major European football game and for my DM a hotel stay for two and tickets to a major music concert).
I felt thoroughly disregarded.

Family day out on holiday. Wandering round town centre looking at Farmer's Market, Museum, few shops etc. Bought supermarket sandwiches to eat after next stop, usual find a park to sit in. But then plans changed and ended up visiting toddlers play centre, which had a cafe. Myself, DF, DS and Bil all order hot meals to eat while Little One plays, and ha ha ha DM leaves to walk back to sit in car alone eating her Tesco Express sandwiches so as to not waste the money she'd spent.

The vision of her sat sadly munching her sandwiches alone in the car on an industrial estate car park rather than with the rest of her family chatting over a lovely cottage pie still bewilders me.

I would do the same as your DM - I hate wasting money or food.

I'm not sure it really counts as being a tightwad when it's your own pleasures you are scrimping on to save money - I would call that being frugal.

@ThumbWitchesAbroad - probably is. I'm 53 this year & my folks always used it for thirsty.

I wouldn't have paid and said we'd already contributed by bringing desert and drinks and where was their contribution to the meal btw?

When we were first going out, DH and I lived in different cities and he got the train through to stay with me on Saturday night. It was pissing down so I said rather than walking up to meet him at the station to meet him and both of us walking back in the rain, he could get the bus right to my door.

He said he'd prefer to walk but if I really didn't want to, I could chip in for half of his bus fare. 60 PENCE EACH.

I laughed, told him to piss off and, thankfully, kept seeing him. That was 10 years ago and I still bring it up. He's not tightfisted at all and says he has no idea why he suggested that at the time

Something that made me sad was DH telling me that when he went to senior school and the letters about school trips were sent; the ones involving a trip abroad with a cost, he always thought his parents were so poor it was out of the question so threw them away before he got home. The one he did go on was a French exchange (it was almost mandatory for those doing French O'Level) and it led to a love of France.

It really affected him and he almost signed the children's trip letters before they asked. I think once or twice he did and ds said, "er thanks dad, but I don't want to go on that".

@sueelleker

I'd have taken my meat out, and taken it home with me!

Yes - me too! That was very grasping behaviour by these "hosts"! 🌹

I always thought it meant thirsty - I found this:

www.phrases.org.uk/meanings/spitting-feathers.html

Which explains why older people think it means thirsty (like I do) and younger people think it means angry.

My parents are both tight- both think buying a coffee is extravagant but happy for you to buy it for them. Both got lucky in the property market and each have a decent mortgage free house in the Home Counties. Neither have offered me or my siblings a penny to get on the property ladder when they know we don’t really have a hope in hell otherwise.

However, going against the grain on a couple of things:-

1. Petrol money- I’ve lost count of the number of times people have taken advantage of me and demanded a lift (often not a close person- a neighbour or friend of a friend), and not offered to pay towards my petrol costs. I always at least offer or buy the person a treat.
2. Tips. Right, hard hat on, but I frigging loathe paying them. It’s not my fault or problem if the waiter isn’t paid properly. Companies should pay appropriately. If I go out (rare) sometimes I’m on a v tight budget and don’t really want to be there anyway. I certainly don’t want to add to my bill! Also, I’ve never been tipped in any of my jobs ever. As a nanny a long time ago, I once received a Benefit makeup kit. That’s it!

A celeb I used to work with once ate a sandwich with a filling he said would make him ill rather than add another £2 to the tour costs for a new one. He also used to try to get free things from shops. He's a millionaire.

Dh not usually tight I’d say careful with money but he hates spending money on a taxi . Christmas refused to get a taxi as was double fair would of cost about £10 which we can well afford but made us walk in the freezing cold back from relatives .
went to a function recently was a 20 minute walk not far but in heels I said no we are getting s taxi , he reluctantly agreed on that one .
I got a taxi somewhere recently meeting friends public transport was unreliable he couldn’t believe I got a taxi and not the bus and walk I explained in time it took on bus and a walk it would take a hour of time and £4 . The taxi was 10 minutes and £10 fare again affordable he just refuses to spend money on taxis which is odd.

Years ago I was out with my friends having a quiet gastro type pub lunch. We were seated downstairs where we could see all who entered and left establishment. We were all early career girls none of us on big money. We (the liberal spenders on the group) all ordered a starter, main, drink and pudding. As the last person - the tightwad in the group - placed her order the waiter collected back the menus. In that same moment in walks all of our management team who had seating upstairs. We had no idea that they had also booked to this venue.

One member of the management team called over to our waiter and told him that he would be 'comping' our bill. Before we could even utter a response to said manager for his kindness TIGHTWAD jumped from her seat, launched herself at the waiter, grabbed the menu back from him and shamelessly changed her order to the most expensive steak dish and wine on the menu. Her original order was from the 'kids meal section'. Still laughing at this. Decades later she still has not changed her ways!

As a child I always thought my parents were cringily tightfisted. Brought up in WW2, rationing , etc. They recycled absolutely everything, including the polystyrene trays from the chippy ( in those days if you wantd a poly tray they charged a penny) once a month we had fish n chips as a treat and my mum used to send me for them. I cringed with embarrassment producing the cleaned poly trays to save 2 or 3 pence.
Looking back over those 50 odd years I realised my parents and probably many others had it spot on, saving money and the planet as well.
I'm sure what's left of the WW2 generation could teach all these climate change activists a thing or two!!

My father used to go ballistic at anything not used or not used to it’s max.

milk was long life when on special
offer and he would cut it open round the top and tip the last drops into his tea. Tea bags were used a minimum of 3 times.

garden waste was a metal dustbin and he wouldn’t use bags. When the council introduced that rubbish must be in black sacks he lost the plot and started a campaign - not for the plastic issue but the cost of the bags.

then weekly he used to ask for them (the bin men) to shake the bags out and and hand Them back - it was truly awful and when they introduced the wheelie bin - he felt his actions had given rise to this (the protesting of the bags) bugger the fact council taxes went yo
as long as he could go back to throwing it all in without bags. Then he received complaints about broken glass etc in his wheelie bin.

near My work there is a bridge it costs to cross it so I pay £1 each day and my commute is 10
minutes. He felt that was awful of me and wanted me to drive 30
minutes and the long way around each day to save money. I save much more in time and petrol going the short way.

I’m no contact now as he has control issues but I should have stopped the signs as a child through the above behaviour never mind anything else

My DSS is tight and my late DP used to get really hacked off with it. DSS inherited a shedload of money at 21, bought a house and filled it with lodgers, and worked as well, plus gets regular handouts from his millionaire mother, and still hates paying for anything. He had a habit of inviting us round for a meal, that would then turn out to be a takeaway, which DP would end up paying for somehow.

One year, he invited DP and I out for lunch on father's day. When we got to the pub, I bought a round of drinks, and I'd made sure I had plenty of cash on me to pay for my meal. Before we ordered our food, DSS's ex turned up with their little daughter, and I bought a second round of drinks to include theirs. We ordered, we ate, DP bought a round of drinks. We had dessert.

Then there was a sort of stand-off about paying the bill. I put the cash for mine on the table and eventually DSS's ex, who had the least money out of all of us, got out a credit card and offered to pay, at which point DSS scuttled off to the bog.

I gave his lovely, long-suffering ex the money for my and DP's meal, plus some on top towards hers and DGD's. When DSS came back from the bog, I pointedly said "We've given X cash for our meals, and yours was £Y". "Great", he said, "Thanks".

And that was that. He never offered to pay for his meal, and he'd been the one that invited everyone. That invitation cost DP and I well over £100. And to add insult to injury, the food was mediocre at best.

I now wonder if there was some sort of weird dynamic between him and his dad, as DSS has bought me lunch a few times since DP died, and refused to accept any money, and he's been generous with his time too, done jobs in the garden for me and so on.