funny examples of when people have been extreme tightwads / tightfisted

[Sensisoul]

i recently fell out with a friend who is known for being exceptionally tight with money.

They have no kids & do anything to scrimp and save so they can afford a champagne lifestyle at the drop of a hat. They buy expensive beauty items with free gifts and then take the items back for a refund afterwards and not return the free gift!

This is a light hearted post about examples of tight friends, partners & family members who have either gone out of their way to be tight or given terrible birthday/ Christmas presents over the years.

NB- This isn’t a criticism on saving money, being mindful of money to stop hardship etc. It is great to collect coupons and vouchers and I do the same. It is more a lighthearted look at how tight some people can be:

Tell me what happened and when & is that person still in your life?

I’ll give a few examples:

this friend requests vouchers from people at Christmas
but always buys people “presents”. These presents can be anything from some old used nail varnish to free beauty samples sachets.

Their family now insist that they buy them gift vouchers as they no longer want their version of “presents”

Only orders hot water in a restaurant/bar- so drinks are always free. sometimes brings own tea bag and milk if they fancy a cup of tea.

Insists on walking everywhere and is spitting feathers when they share a taxi with anyone. They would sooner walk home on their own at night and potentially risk their own safety, than hail a cab and get home safely.

Order the most expensive luxury drink at a bar and then complain said drink is flat and that another fresh bottle is opened. They would then complain again and get another drink free!

Arrange to meet for lunch/dinner at the venue of their choice & then not order anything at all from the venue & say they are getting something from the burger van nearby afterwards. Then watch me eat my food that was ordered from the venue while they sip on a free cup of hot water. ( the hot water was free btw)

Insist on always getting a child’s portion at any eatery. whether this is chips
from a burger van or a posh restaurant.
This person always has to have the cheapest bill at the end of a meal.

Send a sympathy card when my auntie passed away & have the text in the card crossed out!! God knows what the original card said 😂

We have a friend of DS and his family over a lot. We’ve probably hosted them for full meals (BBQ, Sunday lunch, etc etc) about 20 times in 2 years. Never reciprocated once which is fine, they have a lot going on. Never offer to bring anything. They were coming round recently and I realised we had no gravy granules… sent a message asking if they could grab some from the shop. They turned up with value brand- which they then complained about, saying the gravy tasted rank. They know (because they eat here regularly) that we have Bisto, they’re not hard up either- just felt really stingy to me after all the ‘free’ meals they’d had from us.

While mother and I were staying with my sister, her husband announced that we were going to visit some gardens for the day. When we got there, and discovered the price at the gate, he announced that it was too dear. As we drove away, mother said, "Oh I was going to pay for it". LOL @ the look on his face.

We also had to walk the streets eating McDonald's as he was too mean to pay the extra to sit in, but if anyone else was paying, he'd say, "Oh I think we'll sit in this time".

He said we should use only 2 sheets of toilet paper per visit and if it ran out we had to buy our own.

He is the most boring, tight-fisted man I've ever met 😅

Many years ago, my parents were visiting my then husband and me and offered to buy us a takeaway. Mum gave DH £20 to pay for it (that's how long ago it was). DH came back from picking it up and said, "It came to twenty pounds and four pence. You owe me four pence now." And it took me another ten years and several more children to get round to divorcing him. Mum still enjoys telling the story.

My XH was a darling in comparison with his brother. I pulled an all-nighter typing up the brother's assignment for his university finals. He got a good grade that he wouldn't have got with the handwritten version. I got a half pound box of Cadbury's Roses.

We were moving house and didn't need our old fridge as our new house had an integrated one. Our old fridge was on it last legs anyway but MIL said she'd have it.

MIL is the tightest woman on earth, btw...

I was cleaning out the fridge and freezer and went to empty the bits that were left in the freezer. It was literally 3 Aldi hash browns in a old battered packet, some fish fingers that had fallen out of the box and some rogue peas. As I went to take them out MIL said "no don't throw them away! I'll have them"

She has £177k in the bank, owns her house outright and she works, so definitely not on the breadline!

When DD was born, DH was made redundant and I was not working. With 2 babies under 2, very limited funds we continued with our promise to travel the 1,000 miles for DBIL's wedding (DH was best man). It was costing us the last bit of our savings but it was important for DH, so we did it. I drove us as it was the cheapest option.

We went out to Wetherspoons for curry night at PIL's request. Our total bill came to £14 and PIL took the money off DH.

The next day we went to a bakery, and they bought us a sandwich. I was so shocked.

Then the next day FIL reminded DH that he owed him £6.

There are many other examples over the years but that was so shocking to me. My family would never have done that, esp understanding the situation that we had found ourselves in and the effort we had gone to for the family event.

(I make zero effort with them now, DH does it all. I just smile and wave.)

An ex friend was notoriously tight. Tagged on mine and dhs holiday with dd years ago, never once paid for her meals as we only had 1 bill and she would get up and go for a smoke when it came. Wanted to buy fags to take home, was pricing up all week then made us walk miles on last night to get them, then complained they were heavy to carry back to the room. Then wanted to pput half in mine and dhs cases to get through customs. Said no, we didn't even smoke!

We also used to do a hobby together but would only do events if I was doing it to share costs, then insist on driving and charge me petrol money way and above what it.cost. if I said I'd drive she sulked nd said she couldn't afford it.

Numerous examples of her legendary tightness. She is no longer a friend.

I'm aware that I'm entirely missing the point of the thread here, but doesn't "spitting feathers" mean you're very thirsty, rather than angry as implied in the OP?

@Irishfarmer - yes he thought he was being generous!

Dil visited with her dh and 2 kids, I did a full on 3 course huge xmas dinner type lunch,literally ate so much non of us could walk ,2 hrs later declared they would go home after they had eaten their tea..i mean ffs that one meal would have lasted anyone days. I had to go out and buy more food and cook all over again, We do not get a cup of tea at thier house let alone anythng else.There was food left over and she decided to wrap it up in cling film took it home for them to eat the next day.Never asked just did it..I asked her what she was doing she never batted an eyelid..I mean beyond rude.
A friend of my dds,her mum was calling for coffee and cake on her own,she bought both kids 3 hours early cos theey were bored, They said they were hungry and hadnt had breakfast so I did crumpets and they ate 12 between the 3 of them, Then wanted a sandwhich I did that then the mother,(the cheeky grabby tightfisted fucking thing she was ) said after all that that I had promised her cake and coffee and her and the kids were looking forward to it and was not leaving ti they had had it, The sheer rudeness and cheek beggars belief after all they had had,,,How I didnt throw the cake at her I will never know,I have not spoken to her since,I just cannot,It is not the price of the cake its not its the lack of shame and entitlement after I had fed them breakfast and dinner,I mean ffs how unbelievaby shameless can you be?
The FIL who would split a fart in half if he could get 2 smels out of it....first time i had ever met them...they would do us lunch they insisted,So we drive 160 miles to meet them, all excited get there they are putting fish and chip wrappers in the bin, No lunch seemed to be appearing not even a cuppa, My dh now said something like "whats for lunch mam? "after about 3 hrs, "Nothing we are full "they replied we have had ours", FIL then pipes up "shall I fetch you fish and chips?" I hate fish and chips but was starving and pregnant and needed something ,anything by this point,He goes to the end of their road for fish and chips came back with 4 lots,Fish and chips for me and dh and fish and chips breadcakes and sides for him and MIL for the day after....give me the bill says I owe him £18 quid. We are going back many years now ! Gobsmacked I truly was, I gave him the money £20 and told him to keep the change for going he did too! Talk about making an impression on your new soon to be family....
I have cheeky fuckery trauma I think from the the grabby shits I have ever come across....I could go on but I shall refrain!!!!

I did a couple of hours of unpaid work for a client. Not a problem, my choice, and it was helping them out. Then I gave them something costing £4.99. They gave me a five pound note and asked for the penny change.

Ex in-laws are tight as ducks arses.

Every time there was a party they'd just order tap water. And they'd bring a Tupperware box and plunder the buffet to take home. Soon as the food was out they'd run up stuff loads of food in the boxes then go home lol.

They bought a flask of tea to our wedding reception and our wedding present was a prize they'd won in a raffle...ticket still attached. Mil turned up in her work clothes including tabard and name tag. It was her day off.

I think to be honest I was so shocked she was even doing it i was lost for words. I mean who would ever do that? My dh did say something and she said "" well you made us our dinner so I am ony taking whats ours anyway that you bought for us" I cannot even begin to fathom how to answer that..if they don;t get it then nothing i could ever say would have made any difference. I was genuinely gobsmacked and didnt believe what I was seeing.

mums friend lived in a half a million house yet all they ever ate at home was a wishy-washy soup made with free bones from the butchers!

Some years ago I was a member of an amateur orchestra. One week I had a broken string and no replacement so asked if I could buy one from someone else. A lady had a very cheap one so I gave her the £3 l knew it roughly cost and said that if it cost any more she must tell me. The following week she came up to me and told me string was actually £3.20 and as our interval coffee cost 25p, she would put in 5p while l should put in 20p. Of course, I owed her the money so she was in the right but if the boot had been on the other foot l would not have dreamed of mentioning 20p!

@Iputthetrampintrampoline thank you so much for "...who would split a fart in half if he could get 2 smells out of it". I've never heard that one before and I'm going to use it all the time.

And 😯at your CF friend!

Dil visited with her dh and 2 kids

not your son and grandkids? I’m confused.

I went out on a date with someone about 4 years ago who bought the first round of drinks. He specifically asked the bartender for the receipt, brought the receipt to the table and then gave me his bank details to transfer him the extra £1 for my bottled tonic with my G&T. I still laugh at that one 😂

For the first few years after we were divorced I would invite my XH round on Christmas Day to see the children opening their presents and have dinner with us. One year he dangled around the kitchen looking anxious while we were clearing the table, by which time any normal guest would have left and any normal father would have been spending time with his children. I remembered who he was and said, "Would you like these few leftover potatoes and vegetables to take home with you.?" Five minutes later he departed, visibly relieved, carrying a Tupperware box containing a few cold carrots, parsnips, sprouts and roasties.

Fifteen or so years later, at their father's funeral tea, his brother instructed the caterers to pack up all the uneaten traybakes and curly-edged sandwiches for him to take home with him. He didn't say, "Would anyone else like some of these?"

daughter in law her husband and their 2 children... no your right I was confused lol sorry yes I see how it doesnt make sense! My husbands daughter, from his first marriage.(.as they were all adults when we met I am just known as tramp and not step mum or grandma) her husband and their 2 chidren.. Is that a bit clearer? Hope it is ! x

perfect sense! I had a busy day in work so my brain was too tired to think beyond the fact DIL meant married to DS

I think so, @TreacheryPepper - ‘spitting tacks’ is angry, ‘spitting feathers’ is thirsty.

Out for a meal with with DB, SIL & their teenage son at a proper restaurant.
DH & I had starters & mains, (i.e. 4 dishes) , they had puds as well (9 dishes).

I objected to splitting the c. £300 bill in 2 as suggested by DB. Luckily, SIL saw sense & averted an argument.