I’ll try to be brief. A few weeks ago we received an invite for a surprise b’day party for DHs oldest/best friend from his wife.
we seemed to have gotten our invite later than most, fine. Party is adults only on a Saturday night.
It clashes with a ticketed event I am taking DD to anyway so I’m not going. It’s in DH’s home town over 200 miles away as well and honestly we struggle for childcare anyway so would have been impossible unless we took DD.
DH looked at hotels but there is something going on locally so he’s taken Friday/Monday off and is picking up someone else and staying on school friends floor. They’re organising some boys activity for the Sunday as well.
Except friends wife has now sent several texts checking whether I am coming (DH said straight away I have plans, expensive plans, made last year). Now has texted to say how disappointed she is I’m not coming and she really thought I would have made the effort.
for context, they’ve never travelled to see us (they used us a stop off once) they don’t acknowledge my birthdays (DH sent her flowers/present on her last landmark birthday), lots of comments about how little we come now (DHs parents are both dead and they are away all summer holidays).
in our youth we went a fair bit but we had somewhere to stay and weren’t tied to school terms.
I think I am annoyed that not going, having a good reason isn’t, not making an effort.