Redesigning your life? Has anyone done it?

[ComplexRoarma]

First up, should preface my saying I have Complex Trauma and DID. Second up, I am in a really bad place at the moment (though not self harming or suicidal). I really need to sort myself out because I cannot continue to live life with this constant feeling of impending terror (I do want to continue to live, it's the terror bit that needs to go). I dissociate frequently so spend a lot of time panicking I've done something wrong or trying to figure out what the hell I have been doing. It's really very, very stressful.

I want to design a new life - like make changes and incorporate them into my life - but worried I will just set myself up for failure. Has anyone done it successfully where they've set goals, created a routine and stuck to it; did it make a big difference?

I know I need to get physically healthier so I was thinking of starting running again, but I don't know if starting to run with the purpose of running in the evenings when your anxiety is maxxed out is a great plan due to the risk of a woman going for a run in the evening.

People can set goals, stick to them and improve their lives but having complex trauma and DID are pretty big barriers to a complete “redesign” of one’s life. Even without mental illness, a “redesign” of a life isn’t an easy undertaking

You want to try going for a run but are prone to dissociating (including amnesiac times as I think you are describing), would be planning the run at a known peak anxiety time, as well as you have expressed concerns about your safety as a woman during an evening run. It’s good that you are aware of the obstacles to achieving your goal.

Those are pretty high barriers to accomplishing your goal of going for a run and it seems like the run might not be a feasible goal right now?

Could you set a less overwhelming goal?

Thanks for the reply, and for spelling out about the running - even though I was typing that it wasn't coming across as how big an issue it may be - this is where the illnesses make it really, really difficult to set goals.

Maybe a routine would be a good goal?

Hi @ComplexRoarma
I'm trying to make significant changes in my life - in slow and gentle way. Making one change and getting used to it before introducing the next. I'm starting with a routine and rules for myself.
What about your current routine would you like to change? I started with getting up at the same time every weekday (and no snooze button) - I'm now getting up at that time at the weekends too without an alarm, even though it isn't a rule. It has definitely had a knock-on positive effect on other areas of my life.