I find a lot of charity's to be nothing under the surface

[Jobseeker19]

I have contacted Shetler as a last resort about an issue I'm having and was just sent generic links to stuff I have already done that haven't worked. There was no actual help just information that is already out there.

Last year I had a mental health crisis and spoke to Mind online chat and was told about their Elefriends website which was a place to vent. But no actual help given.

If you look on the websites of many charities you will see they talk about how your donation will help someone desperately in need. But when you apply because you are that person in need there seems to be a barrier and are as helpful as uk.gov websites.

[Typo in title edited by MNHQ]

Then they need to say that they are about raising awareness and not say that you can seek help from them.

I agree, I have tried to get help in the past from three charities and had the same experience as you, no help whatsoever.

DP was not at all happy with MacMillan when DFIL was dying of cancer and has nothing nice to say about them now.

For this reason I do not give anything to charity anymore, none of them helped me when I needed them.

I'm sorry that some people have had poor experiences.
Macmillan were lifesavers for us. I don't know how we'd have managed without them. They literally picked up every element of need for us, from telling us about benefits and filling in the forms for us, to arranging for an OT to visit, to providing a daily Macmillan nurse visit and checking that everything was in place. And when my husband died, they were still available to support me.

I found British Heart Foundation to be extremely helpful when needing advice and reassurance about a family member's heart condition.

Agree that many large charities focus more on lobbying now, as that's what will have the biggest, long term and sustainable impact.

Unfortunately this kind of work isn't what drives people to donate, so fundraising campaigns often focus much more on the practical work (the nurse, the helpline etc).

Yes, demand incentive. Look at Stonewall, achieved a lovely goal of representation and furthering rights for LGB, now do should we do more maintenance on that or close down? Nah, let's champion transgender rights to the detriment of LGB, then when we've decimated those we'll go back to LGB again!

It's the same with everything, especially pharmaceuticals/medicine.

You will find smaller grassroots organisations much more helpful. For housing, go via something very small and local, somewhere that does a hands-on sleep in for rough sleepers, and they will actively help you into a tenancy.

I tend to agree, OP, although obviously there are honourable exceptions. Even where charities do provide actual services - as opposed to raising awareness or lobbying - they are often funded by the government to do so. It may be implied that their fundraising is to pay for running the service, but in reality they are contractors.

I used to be much more trusting until a friend worked in the sector for a while. She felt that the organisations consumed most of their resources simply by existing, rather than by providing anything people actually needed.

@Jobseeker19

Crisis are more useful for practical amd immediate help if you're near one of their centres www.crisis.org.uk/get-help/

As previously mentioned Shelter and Mind do a lot more lobbying / big project funding rather than one on one help

that doesn’t surprise me. You’re probably better off looking at local charities if relevant to your situation and if the exist. I think Mind have local branches.
i have worked for a local charity and they really did need the funds, but imo pissed some money up the wall in other ways (even though they made redundancies)- I assume that the business money was a different income stream to ‘donated’ money which was ringfenced.

Yes it totally depends on the charity. Some do actual real life support, support sessions, you can meet a worker, get in-person help. Others will just be signposting. And I agree that it should be made clear at the beginning. Especially as for some people, sign posting is terrible because they can’t follow the instructions or don’t have phone credit to call round or can’t access internet.

My issue is that they say they help (get help NOW click here) but when you keep digging or requesting help there is none.

I know you put it all in your opening dialog with them, but actually like any other service provider at this level (think NHS 111) the telephone operators will have a script of questions to go through anyway, or the website auto chat bot will need to run those questions etc.

Then, hopefully, you get referred to the services in your area (because a national charity obviously needs to then divide into regional branches, just like a bank or whatever). And those regional services can be as excellent or as crap as any other organisation. They might not have the volunteers in your area, or a lack of funding to run specific projects, or be badly managed, or have really high demand (or really low demand) that affects things.

I’m try sorry you feel let down but I think your expectations that you’d write one email and it would finally solve your complex issues (I assume they are complex because most stuff like this is, and if it’s not you can usually solve it alone) - that expectation was unrealistic and not the fault of the charity.

I havent just sent one email. When I pushed for further help I was basically given a final response or the links to other websites were reposted.

I agree with you so much. My husband has a very rare form of cancer which the oncologists admits because it,s so rare they don’t really know how to treat it. We went to visit the Macmillan lounge in the hospital to ask for help and some reassurance, all we got was Here’s a leaflet, whatever we said all we were offered was another leaflet. When I asked if they could assist in claiming some help they said no.There are 2 people permanently employed in this lounge.What do they actually do all day Other than give out leaflets. The Macmillan nurse actually on the unit who is supposed to keep in contact with us as a go between between clinics has not contacted us since September. If eel that the adverts on television are totally misleading and the charity seems to be run entirely to keep their own employees employed rather than actually helping people when they are very vulnerable

Have you tried contacting your local mind branch. They're normally they ones that deliver actual services on the ground?

I’ve worked for large MH charities. It’s mainly project based and area dependent.

For example there are employment services specifically for people who have MH difficulties but depending on who wins the contract it could be a different charity delivering the service.

Mind do not get commissioned for all services so it’s worth looking at other charities in your area who might have a bigger profile. Certainly in my city Rethink has quite a large presence.

Also the salaries aren’t high working in the national charities. I would earn more money working for a smaller charity.

As I say, I’m really sorry you feel your expectation hasn’t lived up to the reality.

What were you hoping for from Shelter? If the things they’ve advised you to try haven’t helped, and you want next steps, is it because there isn’t a legal route to fix this for you? Did they signpost to your MP, etc? Or CAB, who do in-person appointments. Crisis - as a PP mentioned - also do crisis housing assistance.

MN is great for practical wisdom. Start a thread asking specifics?

I used to be much more trusting until a friend worked in the sector for a while. She felt that the organisations consumed most of their resources simply by existing, rather than by providing anything people actually needed.

But thing is that existing IS the main cost. I'm a trustee of a small charity employing six people. We're extremely lucky to only pay a very small rent to have a office in a building owned by a charitable trust. But simply paying our staff and having computers, IT systems, etc means that most of our income goes to that. But if we didn't have those staff and systems, we couldn't help anyone, and nor could we manage our very important volunteers. Our actual work isn't expensive, but keeping the charity in existence so that we can do what we do, is a major funding nightmare.

Of course donors would like to think that their money goes straight to those we help in some more tangible form (and of course some of it does), but in our field, having someone to answer the phone to distressed service users is the most vital and important use of their money.

Fortunately the big corporate funders are generally happy to have their money spent this way, and we do aim to use small donations from individuals in a more direct and tangible way.

I be agree. They waste money and are so inefficient.

Firstly, I'm sorry you're having such a tough time op.

Having worked and volunteered for charities for many years, I can give answers to some of the above.

It is absolutely not true that large charities are some kind of cushy gravy train for staff. Over the last couple of decades, the way charities can apply for funding from government has moved away from grants to competitive contracts. This means that charities are competing with each other to get funding. They have to operate in a corporate way, or they'd have no hope of winning those contracts. That means you have to have a head office with hr, finance etc and a chief executive who knows what they are doing. Those people would get much higher salaries if they worked in the private sector. You can't run a large organisation on volunteers.

Every charity is led by a group of volunteers though- the trustees. The chief executive reports to them.

Small, local charities are often staffed by volunteers, meaning they're at high risk of folding as they are reliant on the good will and spare time of their volunteers.

I've seen in my professional and personal life some amazing, life changing work delivered by charities.

It's interesting that people have had such different experiences of big organisations like MacMillan, for example. Is it area-dependent?
People are recommending contacting smaller, local charities - but how does one know what they are?

This. Have you tried this or that app, but nothing useful.

MacMillan
I was shopping shocked when DH got cancer that they could offer no practical help or advice unless you were on certain benefits. The phone support was also non-existent- it is an unusual cancer (thanks I knew that) I no longer donate to them.

@SquirrelFan

I would do a quick Google search in my area, as most local charities will know where to signpost you too.

Having worked in large MH charities I have my own personal case studies that have been successful. We do make a difference.

The problem is the sheer amount of need that exists currently within society. The average person on the street will find it hard to access Statutory or voluntary MH services.

Some projects will only take via secondary NHS MH teams, other projects you can self refer too.

Postcode lottery. There are massive variations on what is on offer, and like I said in my city Mind doesn’t have a huge presence, but Rethink does.

Womens Aid are amazing, the support was excellent. Every problem I had they had experience in and solutions worked out. I wonder if this is due to the volunteers having direct experience of the situation. Unfortunately despite having one of the higher levels of domestic abuse in the country, my county has no Domestic Abuse presence, meaning a 60 mile trip to access any help or children's support. Why when there's a provable need for a service is there none available? That seems like poor management of need and supply. There seems to be so many services and support in towns and cities, but rural areas are abandoned.

I have received excellent support from Mind, they have liased with other services for me and provided physical help when needed. I appreciate I'm very fortunate and it's probably a case of lucky alignment of needs and funding.

The Salvation Army are currently looking out of touch with their neglect as landlords and their extravagant new south London offices makes them look like mountebancs.

Arthritis research charity only seems to be focused on Rheumatoid arthritis, and as a result a rheumatologist told me that he'd prefer to have RA than something like Fibromyalgia.

I suppose an example of a good use of funds would be the Aids charities as they seemed to do so much good at the same time as research. Like Women's Aid, is this due to personal experience perhaps.

Also I forgot to add the large charities lobby and campaign to the government mostly about things like poor access to services. The third sector is heavily involved in the transformation of mental health services via the NHS long term plan.