In laws were round for the afternoon/eve yesterday. They pop round for dinner every 6 weeks or so, but live nearby so we see them in little bits inbetween.
While they were here a friend called and asked if I had time for a quick chat - I was pottering in the kitchen. While on the phone I saw toddler dd out the window and chucked. I told my friend what she was doing and that she was running rings around PIL and dh out there.
My friend asked if I didn’t think I was rude not being out there with them? And why was I not with them all anyway, it’s my house.
I get on really well with PIL, but they are predominately here to see their son and grandchildren, not me. So I’ll just get on with cooking the food, cleaning up or just pottering about so that can happen.
I’m not absent the entire time, I come in and out to chat and I’m not rude. No one has ever mentioned it. PIL always leave happy having had a good chat with dh and played with the children.
My friend said that she is always there when her in laws visit as it’s her family unit they are visiting. She said it’s her home, if they visit then they are there to see them all. I think the opposite - they are there to spend time with their son. I don’t want to dominate that time.
I had never thought of it until yesterday and for context, I don’t have any family (only one elderly parent who is in a home), so it’s never happened the other way round.
Just wondering what other people did or am I odd?
I asked dh if his parents have ever said anything and he said no, they always speak affectionately about me.