Chances of social housing in London?

[Socialhousinglondon]

Just had my second DD a few weeks ago.
I’m a healthcare student currently on mat leave and due to go back early next year.

H not physically abusive, but could be considered financially abusive. Talked me into second child and then did a 360 on me. Doesn’t help with either DDs so I am up all night ebf, and then up at the crack of Dawn with toddler dd. I honestly thought I was going to have a heart attack this morning. Heart racing, palpitations etc. Feel so on edge.

So ashamed of this but yesterday I stole nappies from the supermarket. I have no money, he won’t give me any despite being on a 6 figure salary. I’m so relieved I’ve been able to breastfeed because no way would I be able to get formula. He’s not violent but can talk pretty poorly to me.

I live in London, in the south. What do you think my chances are of getting social housing in my situation? Considering I have no money etc, I would have to rely on housing benefit etc. I would also have to do this in secret because he has in the past threatened to take my dd away from me. I feel so trapped

In

In London very low.

Have you got anywhere else to go? Family? Friends?

Hi op, many MN will be along with plenty of advice but I’m bumping for you.

Please talk to both your HV and Women's Aid. You are in an abusive situation and need urgent help to get away. They may be able to help you with access to housing and support.

Unfortunately no family and nowhere to go, fully up shit creek without a paddle. I actually have a HV appointment in a few weeks, although she is a bit strange.

You should talk to women’s aid.

Have a look.at the freedom programme online if you get a spare moment

If you’ve got no family are you wedded to London? It would be so much more affordable somewhere else and, presumably, as a nursing student you could transfer anywhere with a university and a hospital?

You can flee him and ask for temp accommodation as you are being domestically abused.

Please look at Refuge website.

Could you talk to your college/ uni about transferring somewhere else to complete your training? London is very short on social housing, but if your willing to move other areas have much more availability. You said you don't have family nearby, and they need health care workers everywhere.

Sorry to hear about your situation.

The housing situation in South London (and London altogether) is utter shite. Every area is SO overcrowded and so many people are bidding for council flats and waiting for years. I was actually thinking about this today and thought, ‘everyone that got their council house 15/20 years ago were so lucky because there was a point where they were more or less handing them out.’ You had a baby, you got a council house. You say your mum kicked you out, you got a council house. I wish I had my kids 10 years ago (even though I would have been 13 lol).

There is of course help available to you. If you contact your local council, they’ll be able to help you. You’ll most likely go down the homeless route and will be in temporary accommodation. Depending on what borough you’re in, some councils keep you in temporary accommodation for a short while and push you in the direction of private renting (the council pays the deposit and UC covers the rent depending on your incone). Or you stay in temporary accommodation for 2-4 years and finally get a council place. The quickest way to get a council flat is going down the homelessness route. Even though you have two kids, simply bidding isn’t enough as you can be placed in band C or maybe B if you’re lucky and you’ll be bidding for YEARS.

In a nutshell, I wouldn’t get my hopes up at all unless you’re willing to be placed in temporary accommodation. As others have suggested, maybe speak with Women Aid to see what they’re able to advice

You can try but even in my area it will be years in temporary accommodation, as you will only be band B (a is only for those downsizing over house has been destroyed by fire etc) so band b will still be a good few years.

This is terrible . How do you buy food op?

I think you should contact women's aid. Are you married? Even if you're not, if you split up, he'll have to pay child maintenance. If you are married then won't you have some claim or entitlement to the family home? I'm no expert though. You need legal advice.

I think you need to contact women’s aid and be prepared to leave London.

You deserve more than this.

Please contact Women’s Aid, they have seen every type of abuse, every situation. They will listen and be able to advise you.
Not “giving” you money is abuse, it’s his way of controlling you.

You college/Uni will also have a counselling service and your personal tutor is also there to support you.

I don’t know what your husband expects you to do if the baby has no nappies—- do you think he expects you to beg him for money ? ( this would feed his control I suppose) it’s a cruel situation and I hope you can get out ASAP.

Everyone saying Womens aid. Do you know they don’t have a helpline. I didn’t til recently.

Here’s the 24 hr domestic abuse helpline.

www.nationaldahelpline.org.uk/