How long does it take you to relax on holiday?

[StillRock81]

I remember my Mum 'needing' a fortnight away on holiday or else she couldn't switch off and relax. I, at the time, thought this absurd and surely as soon as you are away you chill out, enjoy being somewhere different etc.

Yet here I am, 43 yes old, day 5 of holiday and I've just about relaxed into it and we'll be leaving on Sunday. For me, it's been the handling of the organisation before hand/ work stuff / the crazy behaviour from the kids (aged 9-16) who get excited/ argumentative/ a thousand requests and demands etc / feeling responsible for everyone having a good time/ remembering everything .... feeling self conscious of my body (oops forgot to lose that 2 stone again!) and peri menopause symptoms interfering with things.

Not that I don't want to get away again but it's a big stressor I feel. And it's a shame! My DH feels none of this btw so guessing it's a woman / mum / wife thing? Or just a me thing!

I get what you mean. We recently went to a part of Italy I don’t know, and I was relaxed by day four, but the planning, flight, getting used to Covid regs etc. was quite stressful. Places that are new, droves from the airport, the weather forecast, forgetting stuff, disrupted meal times all add to the cumulative stress by the time I reach the destination.

In the summer we head to our family’s chalet in The Alps and I relax pretty much the moment we are on the road, heading to the tunnel. As do the kids as they have done the trip since babyhood. I know what I’ll eat at my favourite restaurant in Troyes and the feeling the next day when we see the first mountains is incredible. Similarly, I relax the moment I smell the African heat as I step off the plane in Windhoek, which sadly hasn’t happened for too long now.

Ok I know this is a very mumsnet question. But why do you get all the pre holiday stress and not your DH?

I hate the pre holiday stress of trying to finish up work before a holiday but not much else phases ‘e and I relax pretty much as soon as I’m at the departure gate at the airport.

If it is somewhere we have been to loads of times then I relax within 24 hours. Otherwise it can be a few days.

DH has his own stressors but doesn't see a lot of it, doesn't react to it etc. He'd do anything to take any stress off me but it's not always as straightforward as a lot of it is internal - waking up several times in the night going through 'to-do's' etc. last night I slept all through for the first time!

I relax as soon as I get to the airport, but that’s because there’s just me and dh now! Previously it took till we got to the villa we stayed in

Once we've arrived, checked out the hotel/apartment, unpacked. There's always that worry that it'll be a dump, despite as much research as possible

After that it's feet up, good book and a glass of wine, my kind of holiday

I don't know if I'm just extremely laid back but I don't understand all thos stress. Work will be there when you get back,people will cover urgent stuff. If you forget something we'll its not like there are no shops at your destination. People will have more fun if your also relaxed. I honestly never get that stressed so I relax straight away.

Sounds very dramatic OP

As soon as I've unpacked at the hotel.

I send DP & kids out to the pool, so I can do it on my own, looking forward to this years holiday (cancelled twice) as we are revisiting a hotel we went to in 2017, which was brilliant.

I need some of the extremely laid back attitude- I don't know why I find it all so stressful- it's hard for me to go from non holiday to holiday mode.

The 6am glass of wine at the airport !!

I find not taking my phone out with me everywhere helps. It can take me till the Wednesday of a week long holiday to unwind.

@RunningKatie

I find not taking my phone out with me everywhere helps. It can take me till the Wednesday of a week long holiday to unwind.

Yes agreed- I've turned off all notifications and social media. Been limiting Mumsnet/ news to once / twice a day

@LabraDabraDoo

I get what you mean. We recently went to a part of Italy I don’t know, and I was relaxed by day four, but the planning, flight, getting used to Covid regs etc. was quite stressful. Places that are new, droves from the airport, the weather forecast, forgetting stuff, disrupted meal times all add to the cumulative stress by the time I reach the destination.

In the summer we head to our family’s chalet in The Alps and I relax pretty much the moment we are on the road, heading to the tunnel. As do the kids as they have done the trip since babyhood. I know what I’ll eat at my favourite restaurant in Troyes and the feeling the next day when we see the first mountains is incredible. Similarly, I relax the moment I smell the African heat as I step off the plane in Windhoek, which sadly hasn’t happened for too long now.

I relate- something about knowing what's coming next feels comforting I think...

We went to away a few weeks ago. On a child free break (as this was), I'm usually relaxed after my first cocktail. This time however, all the strict covid protocols and the stress of the 3 day PCR test results, made me feel quite wound up and it took me at least 3 days to relax.

I feel relaxed at the end of the first full day. I need to go through the routine of everything - the first day for me is all about learning about the new place and how to fit into it.

The second my feet touch the tarmac I'm relaxed

As soon as we get to my grans house in Italy/the hotel. The plane/train/taxi bit is stressful with 2 DC but I am relaxed as soon as we arrive at our destination.