Keeping quiet about having surgery

[BlueBloodedBlue]

As a result of me having cancer in the past, DC (18 and 15) are unsurprisingly very health anxious, particularly where I am concerned.

I therefore try not to mention doctors visits etc but tomorrow I am having investigative surgery under a general anaesthetic. It's a short, simple procedure and as safe as things can be with a general but I'll be out all day and DH will have to come and pick me up so DC will wonder where we are etc

My inclination is make up an excuse (they're teenagers, they don't really give a monkeys what we do!) but DH is worried that, if something goes wrong, they'll be even more devastated I didn't tell them.

Would be grateful for any thoughts?

Tell them.

My mum keeps things from us, even now, for what she believes are good reasons and it's so much harder to deal with than just a simple conversation beforehand.

I would be honest with them tbh.

My mum used to try to shield me from stuff like this, and it made me more anxious tbh. I knew when she was hiding stuff and it just sent my mind into overdrive about what it was that she wasn't telling me.

I am totally honest and transparent with my dd about stuff, and I think it helps her to manage any anxieties because she knows that she doesn't have to second guess what's going on.

Sorry, forgot to update (annoys me when other people do that).

I didn't tell them in the end as they both made arrangements for the day and so didn't notice I wasn't about.

I have, however, taken what has been said on board and do agree they're more likely to fill gaps with worse ideas and will tell them if it happens again.

Thanks for the replies.

I would be honest
Hope all goes well with your surgery

Tell them. If you don't and they find out afterwards, they will always have anxiety and think you're hiding something