Reception friendships

[canichange]

My DS is in reception and he went to the pre-school attached for a year beforehand. I don't know whether he actually has any friends. He mentions names and he does like to play in the playground with other kids after school, but I don't feel like he has a particular mate or gang that he likes to spend time with. He was invited to a birthday party a few months ago (only 5 or 6 were invited) and has been to a couple of whole class parties.

Is this normal for reception? I think I expected him to have latched on to a particular child/children, but maybe I'm expecting too much for a 4 year old.

It sounds completely and utterly normal!

Totally normal. I worried about this too at that age, but then discovered that it was more or less the norm for my friends' children as well.

This sounds like my 5 year old? I asked the teacher at parents evening and she said he was fine so I try to worry less now :)

Oh really, that's good to hear. It always feels like other children have really close friends, but maybe that's just what it looks like from the outside.

Sounds totally normal.
Be proactive in arranging playdates with the kids he plays with in the playground.

you can help facilitate stronger friendships by organising the odd after school playdate. Do you chat to the other parents

Yes I do chat to other parents but it doesn't ever feel like it will materialise into more. There are two little boys he plays with often, one's mother is lovely but is often working and the other's mother is literally impossible to talk to - so cold faced!

I might invite the little boy whose party he was invited to. There is a whole class party tomorrow and I know he's going as his mum asked me to remind her of the details, so maybe I'll see if they want to meet up over the Easter holidays.

Hit send too soon. I always feel a bit unsure whether I am trying to hard and should just let him get on with it, or whether I'm not doing enough!

I feel so similar to you! I wish I could say this to the school mums, it would make life so much easier!

My son had zero friends at reception, then covid lockdown started so obviously he wasn't there anyway, didn't really return to school until late into Year 1. The kids that had friends in reception were usually related in some way or their parents were close friends. We live in a city where folk of my generation tend to stay local (we moved here) so there's usually cousins in classes etc.

Honestly I wouldn't worry. In reception they often still play alongside rather than with other kids and if they're happy to rub along with everyone that helps avoid the upset when their best friend isn't in, moves away, they fall out with them!