Cost of living - why does it not stop going up!

[Flopsy145]

I earn a good salary, £32k, my partner is self employed and on a similar wage, we live in a 3 bed house that we bought with shared ownership in a village in Oxfordshire. Our household bills alone are £1600. We then have £550 nursery payments, he has £250 child support, we both have £250 loan payments from a few years ago (car, debt consolidation etc).
So for a household monthly income of about £4k, already our outgoings are £2900. That's before our own bills of phone, insurance etc, basically leaves us £500 combined to spend for the month on food and life. I just don't know what to do, our daughter only just started nursery and I'm already using my credit card. Our bills just keep going up and our monthly left over is just not enough and I'm getting so stressed. I do my shopping in Lidl, I only buy clothes for me (barely ever) and daughter on eBay. I'm really trying and I just am on the verge of tears constantly.
I don't really know what Mumsnet can do I just needed somewhere to vent, but any advice greatly appreciated!!

I can't easily get another higher paid job as my daughter's nursery is subsidised by my organisation so I could only move within my organisation which isn't easy. My boyfriend works as much as he can, weekends, late days!

Surely things have to come down soon!!

If you are not too picky and don't live too rurally try too good to go for food. £3/£4 for a bag of random food that's reached it's use by date. I have started getting bags from one of the Uber eats type food delivery services and I'm getting burgers, salmon, chicken plus bakery and fruit / veg. The Morrisons ones are also fantastic value for fruit and veg. Could probably do you most of the week again for £3. My daughter likes it because we often get big tubs of blueberries included or strawberries which I don't often buy her!

Can you sell anything on Vinted? Go veggie, meal plan to the extreme so you don't waste money on top up shops.

I agree about the take aways . But you need to reframe it from

“ We never go out to eat so these take aways are actually saving us money compared to dinner in a restaurant . And they are our only treat, poor us “.

To

“ That’s money wasted when we could spend a third of that on the ingredients and cook a simple but delicious meal ourselves “ and

“ We can do lots of free and cheap things for treats , as a couple and also as a family “.

Not “ We can’t event afford the meat pack every week, only every second week “ but “ What a great chance to learn to cook some healthy delicious meat free meals “.

Not “ we can’t afford to eat out with our friends “ but “ Let’s have a pot luck supper at ours “. So much cheaper and more fun, everyone saves money.

You need to see it as swapping one treat for another better one. “Better” is cheaper, better for the environment, healthier, less travel etc

No point in telling yourself that you can’t afford any fun in life and you will never have any treats. That’s just a way to be miserable for the next two years.

What exactly are you paying that totals £1600 is this your mortgage payment?

Do you have sky and so on? Internet package could it be shaved down?

It sounds like you have been living beyond your means in the past and so now you are playing catch up.

Which is good in a way as it means you aren't living beyond your means now. So when you do get those loans paid off you will be fine on your income and you will be able to spend some money,

It's a classic Mumsnet cliche, but you should meal plan. You will find you need to shop far less.

Things will improve. But for the majority it’s fairly normal to struggle when kids are small with childcare. It’s temporary.

Regarding your last comment OP, inflation does not come down easily, in part because it becomes a cycle and so many prices are linked to whichever inflation index is in common use.

I am old enough to remember the 1970s and early 80s where inflation was at times over 20% in the UK, in part fuelled by government decisions (decimalisation and the increase in VAT), and it was over ten years before it approached the levels beforehand and 15 before it got to the 2 to 3% we have been used to for the last 25 years.

I appreciate that does not offer any help to you or anyone else.

The other thing to bear in mind is some businesses seeking to make up lost income denied over the last two years because of the pandemic.

It is a shock for a lot of people, and the pace at which prices have increased. As pp mentioned, the last 25 years have seen low interest rates, low inflation. In the UK we also paid much less than many other European countries for food, power, fuel, white goods, hi tech. We actually (on average) were in a low cost economy, we just didn't realise.

The whole world is now in post-Covid shock. Add in the war in Ukraine, and you have the perfect storm. I honestly don't think any company is profiteering. Even the oil companies, yes, they are making profits on extraction, but they pay huge amounts in taxation. Also, don't forget, if you have a pension, you need these companies to be successful. DH lost a huge amount on his pension in the last few months, something else that isn't acknowledged.

Its bad, and it is difficult to know where to make savings. But it won't last forever, it really won't. Things will equalise somewhat, but it will take time.

I am sorry you are struggling, there is a really helpful lady on the Tiktok app Re Food shopping called @thismumcooks very helpful for those trying to budget food shopping.

Charging things at work?! I got told i was “stealing electricity” by a person here a few weeks ago😂

Well i charge my mobile, Garmin watch and my portable charger at work. Who bloody cares!

Ive switched off what not needed at the wall. Like the ignition for the gas hob, only 2 work so i use a clicky lighter from Home Bargains. No electric diffuser anymore, I rarely watch tv/sky in the bedroom so they’re off, Bedside lamps are off till i need them.

I dont like a warm house (peri so warm enough) but DH struggles. Its layers from now on.

And doing what the rest of you do.

Its like going back to my childhood

Really difficult for people who have bought on credit. Interest rises coupled with utility rises will cripple people.
I have friends whose current dept takes all of their wage each month. Nice cars, holidays and houses - but still to pay for. They are terrified of interest on their loans going up even slightly as there is no way now to recover the money already spent. They've tried selling the car - but this would still leave them a £15,000 debt ( and without the car).