MIL - daughters having babies more special than sons

[Festivalpartygirl]

This is what I got told last night when taking MIL shopping, she’s full of mindless chat, this was prompted by her friends daughter having a baby. It’s really got to me, I know I need to see PIL for the old fashioned people they are, when DS was born (only grandson) comment was made, at least we’ve produced a son to carry on family name. Last nights comment really got to me, back story is I lost my mum before any of her grandkids were born. I’m trying to get a grip, again, numerous comments over the years, but that one hurt and brings it home that my DC have never really had a doting grandparent(late DF was never interested).

I once heard the old line of.

You know your daughters children are your grandchildren you don’t know if your sons are really his.

Was some little old ladies chatting away at a bus stop. No idea how the rest of the conversation went but did make me think if people really think like that.

[quote worriedatthistime]@Sally872 but you just said one is more special than the other
Also the fact you spend more time will likely make you more closer
And not all sisters get on , some sil get on better
So its entirely dependant
Would you say to your brother , our sister having a baby is more special than you to his face [/quote]
The newborn experience is more special for me with my sister as we are closer and more comfortable. Love SIL too but there is a politeness that means I would not be as involved in case it was too much and she was too polite to say. Obviously brother or sisters own child is equally special to them.

Both nephews are equally special and I have a different relationship with each of them due to seeing sisters child more but one is not more better than the other. Time with brothers child is less frequent but more fun and attention to child. Time with sisters child is more often but less of a big deal, sometimes nephew is out playing in garden and I have a 2 min chat.

I would never say any of this to sister or sister in law though as very easy for either of them to be upset. Sil not special or sisters son taken for granted.

@Horst we were once at my mil and her sister actually said to my dh is he yours as he looks nothing like you !!
We have 2 ds , ds1 looks a look like dh , ds 2 more like me
Dh is dark hair and dark eyes like ds1 im blue eyes , blondish and so is ds2 ( although dh had blonde hair when young also)
I was gobsmacked as it wasn't said in a joking way quite serious
Luckily my ds never heard