How to keep going when you feel like giving up?

[Cocomelonagain]

I’ll begin this post by explaining that I’m not suicidal. I lost a family member to suicide and so it’s not a way out that I would ever choose, but I just feel so low.

I’ve just made so many mistakes in my life and I wish I could just wipe the slate clean or start a fresh but I can’t. I take medication, I’ve done counselling, I do mindfulness. I do everything in my power to not feel this way but I still do.

How do I keep going?

I'm sorry you feel like this, it's a terrible feeling that I know all too well. For me, I try and block out the future and just focus on as much of the present as I feel I can handle so the next 5 mins, hour, day etc. At the moment I'm doing it a day at a time. 2 months ago it was 5 minutes so I see that as an improvement.

Thanks @GoLightly282. I’m sorry you struggle too.

I will try just going in 5 minute chunks. Today is a bad day. Hopefully tomorrow will be better.

Look forward, not back. What’s done is done.

I resonate with this..its like the past is always around me. I find exercise can help to boost mood (although it's difficult to get going) and taking things a little at a time. I'm sorry you are feeling like this xx

Thanks @GeneLovesJezebel

I actually have a mental list of the biggest mistakes I’ve made that I run through. I do this to try and resolve them in my mind but it obviously never works. Have discussed and processed them all in therapy but give it a few months and I’m back to dwelling on them again. I would love to be able to just let go of those memories!

I do understand. When I start going over the past I push it out if my mind and force myself to think of something else. Totally distract my mind. It’s exhausting.

Have you tried psychotherapy? I had some a few years ago and it was so much more effective than counselling as they really went into depth about why I made certain choices at certain times. It helped with a deeper perspective and gave reassurance. I also try to remind myself that everyone makes mistakes in their 20's - it's what they're for - but if you are still making them mid to late 30's you probably need some guidance or support to work through why you are repeating negative choices. I also think sometimes people in our past haunt us a bit if there are things left unresolved. I had someone call to apologise for something they did when we were mid 20's and it made me really appreciate them and their growth too. Perhaps if you feel you've hurt someone that tactful apology would be helpful? Often when things go wrong we run away and the guilt comes from that lack of resolution/apology.

Reading works best to distract me but often it feels like a hard thing to prioritise. Calling friends to chat in the evenings helps me more than trying to drown out memories with Netflix as I find I get easily distracted.