Meet the Other Phone. Flexible and made to last.

Meet the Other Phone.
Flexible and made to last.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

WWYD - pre school kids

8 replies

Roadclosure · 18/03/2022 16:46

DD (4) is going to a state pre school. She is very social, she loves nursery and is generally a well behaved child, I never ever got anything negative about her behaviour (she used to go to a private nursery before).

Recently her teacher told me she is friends with this boy Ben (not his real name), they are always playing together, they sit next to each other and she told me we should arrange a play date as they are such good mates. We are always busy in the afternoons so the playdate hasn't happened yet, however DD always comes back home with something negative about Ben. He pushed her in the playground so she's got this big scratch on her arm, he pinched her so she had to retaliate and so on. I also got the impression from the teachers that he is full on and every day there seems to be a chat between his mum and the teachers about something he did. My DD also tells me he is the naughtiest child but she she still likes him and he is her best friend. We finally arranged a playdate next week after teacher insisting that we meet.

Today I met up with another mum for a playdate and she told me Ben is really the trouble maker in the class as she is friends with one of the teachers and her DD never wants to play with him because of his behaviour. I'm now concerned and I really don't understand why teacher has pushed for a playdate and not sure I really want Ben to be my DD's friend outside school. WWYD? I'm a first time mum so not very experienced.

OP posts:
Sprogonthetyne · 18/03/2022 17:17

The teacher is probably keen to push the friendship as your DD is a positive role model for Ben, who may be struggling with his social skills or have sen which makes it harder for him to behave & integrate with peers. The friendship could be really beneficial to Ben, but this should never be at your dd's expense. If she is also benefiting and enjoying the friendship, then it would be great for it to continue, but be on gard to make sure she's not being pressured to spend more time with him then she's happy with.

Roadclosure · 18/03/2022 18:37

I don't really see this friendship benefiting my DD, if anything it's probably going to impact her behaviour negatively.

OP posts:
Bdhntbis · 18/03/2022 18:40

I’d be arranging play dates with other children to encourage other friendships with stories like that

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about these subjects:

Roadclosure · 18/03/2022 18:44

@Bdhntbis she does have playdates with other children, got 5 friends she meets regularly.

OP posts:
liveforsummer · 19/03/2022 07:55

I find it incredibly odd that the teacher is so involved in your outbid school socialising. I work in a school and ever come across this. Massive boundary overstep. Meet up with whoever you like

Roadclosure · 19/03/2022 10:13

@liveforsummer I feel the same way. I guess we will have a play date once and I'll make up my own mind, but I do feel uncomfortable that I was pushed into it.

OP posts:
Picklesandbeans · 19/03/2022 10:17

The teacher has nothing to do with playdates!? Very strange. Just cancel and encourage other friendships.

Xpologog · 19/03/2022 10:34

My first thought was how odd a teacher is organising a pupil’s social life. It’s a very strange thing to do.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page
Swipe left for the next trending thread