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Original poster

Ds almost got hit by a car today

34 replies

Ohmnomnom · 18/03/2022 15:02

Walking to school with ds5. Very narrow pavement and small street with all the usual madness and rush of drop off. He was slightly ahead of me and dd when a group of around 6 people quickly crossed over from the other side of the road and got in between us.

He turned around and then had a quick panic when he couldn't see me and stepped into the road to go around them, just as a car was approaching behind him. Thank god for the fast reflexes of the dad in front of us who caught ds and yanked him back onto the pavement

I still feel a bit sick everytime I think of it. I'm kicking myself for not reacting faster but it all happened in a flash. I shouted his name when he stepped in the road which scared him and he went into school still sobbing. I'll sit him down tonight and have a good chat about road safety. Just feel like an absolutely rubbish mum today.

OP posts:

yourestandingonmyneck · 18/03/2022 15:05

Oh god I can imagine what a fright you got. These things do happen so horribly fast though, you can't give yourself a hard time about it.

Glad he is ok XxX

Sazza26xx · 18/03/2022 15:07

These things happen, my 4 year old done this not long ago, gives you a fright x

R0tational · 18/03/2022 15:07

It's OK. You are not a bad mum. He is safe and well .y You poor thing. Maybe cuddles tonight and road safety talks on the weekend a d regularly. Poor little mite.

FairWindClearSailing · 18/03/2022 15:23

You're not a rubbish mum. These things happen and can happen so quickly. It gave you both a scare but as you say, it's a good opportunity to now talk about road safety so he knows what to do in future

Aquamarine1029 · 18/03/2022 15:25

He was slightly ahead of me

I'm so glad everything is ok, but him being ahead of you, at his age, is not a good idea. Young children can make very poor decisions because they aren't capable of quickly understanding the possible consequences of their actions, such as your son stepping into the road to find you. I have no doubt you won't be allowing that again. I see parents, very frequently, letting their very young children run ahead of them next to the road and it makes me extremely nervous.

ForTheLoveOfSleep · 18/03/2022 15:29

He's 5. Hold his hand. Posters saying "oh never mind it happens to everyone." No it doesn't and its not just one of those things. Learn from it OP.

HumunaHey · 18/03/2022 15:50

@ForTheLoveOfSleep

He's 5. Hold his hand. Posters saying "oh never mind it happens to everyone." No it doesn't and its not just one of those things. Learn from it OP.

OP said it was a very narrow road. I have a few of these around my area and they are terrible if you have small kids with you. Especially one in a buggy and a toddler walking. Someone has to go ahead/fall back. I'm talking half a metre, not running ahead. Walking side by side and/or holding hands while pushing a buggy on narrow road would be more dangerous and would mean one ends up in the in the road unless we did some kind of side stepping. Those roads need railings.

OP, I'm sorry you're shook up. But all's well that ends well and I'm glad you're grateful to the dad for saving your son's life. The attitude of some today would have given him a bollocking for touching their child and scaring them.

I don't know the exactly layout of things or your situation, but perhaps there are preventative measures you could put in place in future.

DuggeeHugPlease · 18/03/2022 15:55

Big hugs to you. I can totally see how this would happen and it doesn't make you a bad mum.

The posters saying hold their hand - yes ideally you would and ideally they would stop at roads and wait for you but life isn't like that and sometimes things like this happen.

My nearly 5 year old likes to run just slightly ahead with her school friends. When it's busy and I have the buggy too it's hard to stay right by her.

What I wish would happen is that drivers would slow right down when driving along the road that has the school on it for literally the 5-10 minutes of the day when it's teeming with school children. But no they zoom along at 30. Once we're on to the next road it's so much easier to manage it and walk home safely.

pastaandpesto · 18/03/2022 16:16

What I wish would happen is that drivers would slow right down when driving along the road that has the school on it for literally the 5-10 minutes of the day when it's teeming with school children.

^ This.

I find it unbelievable depressing that we are so obsessed with the rights of car drivers to do what ever the fuck they want, that we simply accept that the only way of keeping a child safe near a school, at school drop off time is to physically restrain them at all times while walking along a pavement.

And then victim blame the mother for a near-miss (see PPs).

BertieBotts · 18/03/2022 16:30

Yes this! I've been long past the point of constant hand holding by five. In Germany where we live children walk to school by themselves (in groups) at six! Yes they do absolutely have their share of hair raising moments at that age but they aren't babies.

DuggeeHugPlease · 18/03/2022 17:05

Yes exactly. We normally walk but occasionally drive if we have to go out straight from school and I drive at an absolute snails pace because I know excitable children may run out in to the road without warning. It's one road and an extra 2 minutes of my day.

ShadowPuppets · 18/03/2022 17:08

What a horrible fright for you - DH came back from nursery drop off the other day really wobbly after seeing a near miss with one of the 4yos from the preschool room dashing out in front of a car (no one in the wrong, mum was literally just shutting the car door and the car stopped in plenty of time). What a horrible fright - be kind to yourself tonight.

MotherWol · 18/03/2022 17:18

Yes! DD’s school is on a road that’s a popular shortcut as it means drivers can avoid the lights. Signs and speed bumps haven’t worked in making them slow down and we’ve finally succeeded in getting a school street closure. I couldn’t be happier - it shouldn’t be necessary, but it’s time we prioritised safety over a driver shaving 2 minutes off their journey.

hightimer · 18/03/2022 17:35

@ForTheLoveOfSleep

He's 5. Hold his hand. Posters saying "oh never mind it happens to everyone." No it doesn't and its not just one of those things. Learn from it OP.

This.

Hold your child's hand.

UnderwriterOption · 18/03/2022 17:48

Years ago my DD ran ahead a bit in pursuit of a cat while I was walking along with DS. No traffic anywhere. Cat disappeared between some parked cars in a sort of large driveway arrangement. DD who was about three foot tall anyway, was on the pavement but bent a bit to look.

I’d already called her back (but it was a cat, so she was oblivious), when I saw the reverse lights of the car immediately behind her come on. She had no idea and neither did the driver. I’ve never moved so fast in my life. Shouted, ran straight at the back of the car, slapped the boot and grabbed her. Thank god the driver was a good driver and looking all around.

I still dream about it sometimes. She got the road safety talk again as soon as I stopped shaking. I hadnt clocked that she didn’t know what the white lights on the back of cars were.

All of which is to say, I understand the feeling, but things happen and it’s terrifying but they’re learning experiences. It doesn’t make you a bad mum because you can’t cover everything all the time.

FlibbertyGiblets · 18/03/2022 18:13

It is so scary. Mind yourself tonight, you might have horrible dreams. Have a non MN hug, you poor things.

SuperSocks · 18/03/2022 18:58

@Aquamarine1029

He was slightly ahead of me

Oh God, flashback to a very scary near miss I had with one of my munchkins... I was nannying for a 3 year old and 5 year old, and we were walking back from the library where the 3 year old had picked up a leaflet on storytime sessions or whatever. She accidentally dropped it and it fluttered into the road, before I could blink she had her hand out of mine and was diving after it, right in front of a car!! Thank God it was going very slowly and I snatched her back. I exclaimed that she could have been run over, to which her 5 year old brother replied 'But if she didn't get it back the LEAFLET would have been run over!!!' Children just have no idea of consequences at all. I hate seeing little kids running or scootering ahead of their grownups. You've just got to keep such a tight hold of their hands around roads.

Readyforspring · 18/03/2022 19:02

The op said its narrow.
One very busy road here has such a narrow path its JUST the width of a stroller. Not a hope in hells chance of holding a hand. There's always people stepping in the road there. And its on a corner too. Its horrible.

Hope you and your ds are ok

Original poster

Ohmnomnom · 19/03/2022 07:29

Thank you everyone. Feeling a bit better today!

I usually do hold his hand. We were about 10 metres from the school gate and he will sometimes run the last little bit into school. But I take your point about kids not making the best decisions.

I absolutely hate drivers that speed past schools during busy times. We were parked close to the school once and a van came by so fast that it shook the car as it passed! There were young children everywhere but some drivers just don't care.

OP posts:

axolotlfloof · 19/03/2022 07:44

We had a little mantra:
Roads are for cars, pavements are for people
And said it a lot.
He is increasingly going to want to run ahead as he gets older so I think you just drum it into him never to step in the road. Lots of repetition and reminders (and trying to stay close together).
My teenagers still don't like it if they see people walking on a quiet road, when there is a pavement.

Thirkettle · 19/03/2022 11:19

Walk holding little kids' hands.

It blows my mind watching parents walk feet away while little stumbling kids are wobbling around way out in front with no clue as to safety.

Hold their hands!

Thoosa · 19/03/2022 12:54

I think OP has probably had more than enough judgmental posts now.

Readyforspring · 24/03/2022 20:55

Ok so all those judging the op for not holding hand. This is next to a very busy road i have to walk daily. I have a dc in pushchair and 4 yr old has to walk in front. There are a few drives which cars pull out of, tell me how i could possibly hold hand side by side when the width of some of this path only just fits a single pushchair.?

AuditAngel · 24/03/2022 21:01

I nearly ran over a year 7 child today. The school is part of “school streets” which restricts cars from dropping children to school, but currently DD has a medical issue and needs to be driven to/from school. We are hoping this is temporary .

However, the school streets is making kids forget to look and just running across /into the roads,

boomshakalacka · 24/03/2022 21:04

Honestly OP, he's 5. Hold his hand when you're walking next to a road. It really is that simple.

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