Exchanging emails with a person from another department. He wants to change a process so that issues route to his team instead of the business contact, Alex, who normally reviews, troubleshoots and then passes to my team as needed. Process has been the same for years. His team has no knowledge around these issues and will only send the issue directly over to my team, without troubleshooting first and with no details. In this case we would go back to Alex and ask him to do what he normally does and give us the required information.
My team designed and owns this process. His team is only rarely involved - if we discover the issue is not really ours. This comes up every few years, where he or someone like him tries to get involved in our area and make changes which do not make sense. The answer is always the same, that is not how we do things and we do not need more people involved. This comes from quite high up the chain.
I wrote back that any process changes need to be discussed with my boss. (Who will tell him we aren't changing anything.) He's currently away.
Someone else chimed in to say "let us know the process!" So he's confusing people. Now he's again replied told me to schedule the meeting. Our company does not have admins for people at our level and we all schedule our own meetings. I have very little contact with this person. (Always the same actually, he gets involved with some minor issue and makes the resolution take longer.)
How would you reply? The more amusing the better.