Do you have ADHD?

[JustlookingNotbuying]

When in your life we’re you diagnosed, who diagnosed you and what made you think you had it?
I have been looking into this for the last few weeks.
At 49 I am taken aback by how much this resonates with me. How much of my life, from young childhood until now has felt a battle and that a neurodiverse condition seems to make so much sense.
But I am scared which to take this.
I am sacred no one will take me seriously.
I have been told right from childhood that I am not ‘right’, that I am an air-head, lazy, messy and unorganised, unsociable, over excitable, quirky, too anxious, an over thinker etc. It’s left me with no confidence.
But I am so sure it’s been inattentive ADHD all this time.
But I have felt that it’s always been my fault and that I should have had control over it, even though I have felt like I’ve been wading through concrete all of my life whilst others have been gently and comfortably jogging along nicely.
So the next step I suppose is to try to convince my GP (as I can not afford to go private) and if I am lucky and he understands and refers me then I can sit on a 2 year+ waiting list and go slowly insane lol!

It is absolutely worth a try. I cannot describe how much ADHD meds have changed my life 💐

SingToTheSky that’s fab, thank you. I really would l to try and pursue it 🤞

A very good book to read is ‘Scattered Minds’ by Gabor Mate.

I’ve been thinking all of the same things about myself. Would you be able to update what your experience was like going to the GP as an adult? I’m very nervous to go and don’t feel like I would be taken seriously.

@JustlookingNotbuying I’m the same, I’d love to get assessed but scared of looking like an idiot to ask in my 40s @SingToTheSky what age were you when you were assessed and did you go private?

Yes. Went private at mid 50s after decades of therapy and antidepressants. Just been reassessed by NHS and waiting for medication.
Tbh after initial relief that I'm not "just useless" I now feel v low at lost hope for change

Following with interest as I think I may have ADHD too. So much of it fits. Haven't spoken to anyone in real life about it yet and not sure how to go about it. Or whether too at all

I was diagnosed 15 years ago at 45. Getting the confirmation your brain works differently is a relief. For some of us there's a strange period of mourning what we might have achieved if we'd been equipped with the knowledge or even meds.

Your GP won't be qualified to diagnose you but should refer you on to a psychiatrist or specialist service. Back in my day I took the approach with my GP that I 'believed' I had ADHD but if it wasn't ADHD then it was something else and I needed to know what it was. Although convinced it was ADHD I didn't want to risk getting the GP's back up by going in with a self-diagnosis.

In the meantime there are other strategies you can look into for managing life until you get a diagnosis - not that I'm a shining example of keeping these up!

I was in my early thirties when diagnosed (now 35). I was diagnosed on NHS, I think it helped (!) that I had a long history of MH difficulties TBH, as it showed we had exhausted other options. Anti depressants never worked for me.

I am having a private ADHD assessment on Monday through Psychiatry UK. I am in my late 50s but would like some answers

Complete the barkley scale for both as an adult and a child. If you can get a parent to also complete it for you as a child and a partner or close friend to rate you as an adult. If you get assessed your psychiatrist will most likely ask for this anyway so you are ahead of the game.

Dig out school reports. What do they say about you (again a psych will want these if available).

It's easy to kid yourself that you are not impulsive which is a symptom. I just had a sweet tooth/was a marketing man's dream/craved adventure/was spontaneous/liked a drink or 5. So not impulsive at all then

Particularly look at how women and girls present, most information is male centric. Just because I stayed in my chair didn't mean I stopped moving, I doodled/fidgeted, talked ten to the dozen and learnt to play with my hair both to keep moving and self soothe. I still do the hair thing now to keep me calm, it's more subtle due to my masking, but one hand up back hairline gently twirling it round a finger. I may have learned to keep it low key and not obvious/annoying but it is still stimming.

Consider other possibilities especially dyspraxia/autism. Although as well as being confused with ADHD they can appear alongside it! Childhood trauma must be considered too.

A good psychiatrist should go into all of this in depth. It took me nearly a whole day to complete everything I was asked for prior to the appointment and that was hyperfocusing on it!

If you are nervous about speaking to the Dr you can write/email or use econsult to make the first approach.

I hope you find the answer you seek whether with ADHD or something else .

BeggarsMeddle I do worry I could go into a period of mourning for all of those lost years.
SingToTheSky antidepressants have never helped me, they just don’t stop the endless mind chatter. Years of CBT and therapy have done very little either.
Michaelmonsteta That’s great, good luck, hope it goes well. Let me know how it went.
Seagraphy I have completed the Barkley scale online several times and score high. My parents have all my school reports, they all have a pattern to them - ‘a bright child but doesn’t concentrate, seems in a day dream, a bit of a chatterbox’!
I am definitely impulsive, dh has put a stop to that over the years as he has had to bail me out financially too many times. Doesn’t take the urge away though. And I constantly fidget. Can not sit down without shaking my feet or legs and the sides of my hair are broken as I take little clumps of my hair and sit poking them into my ear lol! I also constantly annoy people with clicking pens on/off, yet am totally unaware I am doing it.

I am 33 and was diagnosed two years ago. 2 of my children are also adhd. Since taking medication my life has changed in so many positive ways. I grieve for how hard I tried at school and that I still struggled to much but am so glad i can give my children appropriate support

Michaelmonstera If I was to go down the private route I was thinking of using Psychiatry U.K, their fees are a lot lower than I have been quoted by local Psychiatrists. I would be really interested how your experience with them went.

whinetime89 it is sad that so many of us could have achieved so much more had we been diagnosed earlier, especially at school. I am looking into getting my two dc assessed as well. It’s taken me 6 years of battling with DS’s school for them to acknowledge he may have dyslexia. They have finally assessed him at 16, just before his GCSE’s and yes, he’s dyslexic. I feel so sad and angry the teachers and GP dismissed me.

My youngest as been diagnosed as ADD and the penny has dropped.

I am part way through ASD assessment (eldest has ASD) but I am thinking to think ADD is more likely.

Your first post has described exactly how I feel, from growing up and wading through concrete, to being laughed at by doctors. I'd love to know how you get on. I'm also trying to get my DS assessed for inattentive ADHD and dyspraxia too which is proving to be long and painful.

My boyfriend has it and was diagnosed last year at 47. His meds have a noticeable effect on him - I can tell when he's on a light day with just one dose, when he's had the extra 18mg he is much more focused (but it is harder for him to switch off so those days are reserved for when he needs to concentrate). It's really affected him all his life and impulse control is a huge issue - he bought me a ring after knowing me less than a week and has been known to buy 3 televisions in one week just because he can.

I'm mid 50s & am wondering, again, if this is me. I've pissed off 2 managers, in 2 different workplaces recently, by trying to do my job well. I don't set out to annoy/irritate/disrepsect/clash with anyone but it's a recurring theme in my life that upsets me greatly

I could have written this. I only realised recently when a friend was diagnosed and all the symptoms fitted perfectly to me.Haven't been diagnosed as I'm not sure I would want long term meds. Also need to do things like inform DVLA if you have a diagnosis. I suppose just knowing there is a reason for the way I am helps in itself. I might do some research on meds.

I was diagnosed at 32 last year. Never crossed my mind that I had adhd until I went for a sleep study and the neurologist that I seen is studying the connection between neurodiversity and sleep issues and he said he was convinced I had adhd.i always thought I was autistic but I went ahead with with adhd assessment and it turns out I have it 🤣 the psychologist doing the assessment also said I was more than likely autistic too but he couldn't diagnose that. I was pregnant at the time so I couldn't be medicated and I still haven't gotten round to getting that sorted

Well today I lost my house keys (again) despite having an ultra large key ring and a key finder tag which links to my phone. I have just pulled some washing out of the tumble dryer and out came my keys (which explains why I couldn’t hear the bleep from the tag). It’s a minor thing but it is exhausting, frustrating and embarrassing to continually lose things because I have become distracted and not put them in their usual place

I find the forgetfulness hard. I really struggle to follow an instruction I was given 5 minutes ago because I'm trying so hard to remember it then I doubt myself whether I have got it right. Then I'll either tell you something a million times or not at all and swear blind I have.

@SingToTheSky how have the meds affected you? I’ve been thinking about his thread all day, especially when I was in my car after Doug the weekly shop and couldn’t find my glasses… which I’d had to drive over there with but couldn’t drive home without… I’d managed to loose them IN the bloody car I think tomorrow I’m going to bite the bully and phone out insurance company to see if I’m covered for being tested.

@JustlookingNotbuying I had my appointment with Psychiatry UK today and she said I meet the criteria for inattentive ADHD - it is a relief to know but I wish I’d found out when I was younger. The online appointment worked well