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Original poster

Will you be opening your home up to Ukrainian refugees?

999 replies

musicalfrog · 11/03/2022 08:03

Interested to see how popular this will be considering so many of us want desperately to make a tangible difference.

My OH wouldn't be up for it I don't think, and we don't have a spare room so I will avoid that particular argument. But otherwise I think it would be such a great thing to do.

The govt is asking for a minimum commitment of 6 months. Will you be signing up?

OP posts:
elastamum · 11/03/2022 17:47

We would like to and we have room but we live rurally so not sure if we will be considered suitable.

SophieHasOneQuestion · 11/03/2022 17:54

This question has been in my mind since this morning, and I am trying to be honest with myself.

I live in a small flat and don't have any spare room, but I do have a sofa bed in my living room. If it is a choice between sleeping on the street and someone's home, I am willing take one female for a short period of time, for example 3 months. If it is one female and a child, I can do it for 2 months.

I am willing to volunteer, i.e. cooking, take washing home, cleaning, if there are shelters from them.

Frsta · 11/03/2022 17:59

No, like others I'd be willing to donate or volunteer time to helping in other ways but I would feel too vulnerable having a stranger move in for 6 months or more.

Angelcupcake · 11/03/2022 18:06

@Snippysocks

My husband and I have already decided to host Ukrainian refugees. We have 2 spare bedrooms so a mother and two children or 2 / 3 older single women. Yes - some of them MIGHT be mentally unbalanced etc, and they MIGHT prove a danger. But honestly? Most of them are just like you and me - have been used to shopping in Zara and the local supermarket and just getting on with their lives. We're all so fortunate that we aren't standing in their shoes. I know that not everyone has a big enough home to host - I'm not judging other people's decisions here. And I realise that it won't be easy - we've had people stay with us for months in the past (all lovely!) and I really did want our home back at the end of it. But the desperation on the faces of women just like our daughters and the stunned looks of children just like our grandchildren..... We'll apply asap. And finally - as Christians, my husband and I know we often get things wrong and I was always worried about hosting men as my husband used to be out of our home a lot, but this verse from Matthew has made it a no brainer for us. 'For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in....'
Thank you for that snippy... All the negativity on this thread is making me waver, but that verse has lifted my heart
CrunchyCarrot · 11/03/2022 18:09

Unfortunately, it's just not possible as our home is too small, no place for an extra bed, tiny bathroom. I wish we could!

SophieHasOneQuestion · 11/03/2022 18:09

@Snippysocks

My husband and I have already decided to host Ukrainian refugees. We have 2 spare bedrooms so a mother and two children or 2 / 3 older single women. Yes - some of them MIGHT be mentally unbalanced etc, and they MIGHT prove a danger. But honestly? Most of them are just like you and me - have been used to shopping in Zara and the local supermarket and just getting on with their lives. We're all so fortunate that we aren't standing in their shoes. I know that not everyone has a big enough home to host - I'm not judging other people's decisions here. And I realise that it won't be easy - we've had people stay with us for months in the past (all lovely!) and I really did want our home back at the end of it. But the desperation on the faces of women just like our daughters and the stunned looks of children just like our grandchildren..... We'll apply asap. And finally - as Christians, my husband and I know we often get things wrong and I was always worried about hosting men as my husband used to be out of our home a lot, but this verse from Matthew has made it a no brainer for us. 'For I was hungry and you gave me something to eat, I was thirsty and you gave me something to drink, I was a stranger and you invited me in....'
@Snippysocks Heartwarming....Flowers
newhomenewlife49 · 11/03/2022 18:13

No, I don't have the space or money. It's always "us" expected to take them in, never "them".

Only a few months ago we weren't even allowed out parent in our home

LaMariposa · 11/03/2022 18:19

We have 4 people in 3 bed house, me and DH both work from home (my in our bedroom, him in the dining room) and only one bathroom.
If we had a spare bedroom then I would have considered it.

Wbeezer · 11/03/2022 18:20

The thing that's making me hesitate is potential judgement from Ukrainians! My house is a "project house" something is always being fixed or renovated and my housekeeping standards are "relaxed" as a result. I have a Slovakian friend who has told me that eastern Europeans basically think our housekeeping and cleanliness standards are poor compared to theirs!
It nearly finished me off having DS1s Filipino/American girlfriend staying for part of lockdown as I was constantly cooking and cleaning to make her feel comfortable and welcome.

Tulipomania · 11/03/2022 18:29

@newhomenewlife49

No, I don't have the space or money. It's always "us" expected to take them in, never "them".

Only a few months ago we weren't even allowed out parent in our home

You do realise that the UK is way behind most EU countries in offering to accept refugees from Ukraine?
YogaLite · 11/03/2022 18:30

Think the royals should lead the way with this with some outbuildings Wink

Tulipomania · 11/03/2022 18:31

I have a Slovakian friend who has told me that eastern Europeans basically think our housekeeping and cleanliness standards are poor compared to theirs!

I think if you are fleeing a war zone, your home has been bombed to bits and your kids' life is in danger, then standards of housekeeping come pretty far down the list of needs.

daisypond · 11/03/2022 18:32

@newhomenewlife49

No, I don't have the space or money. It's always "us" expected to take them in, never "them".

Only a few months ago we weren't even allowed out parent in our home

And you should be grateful and delighted by that - that you don’t live in a war zone, or are oppressed.
EmbarrassingHadrosaurus · 11/03/2022 18:41

@Tulipomania

I have a Slovakian friend who has told me that eastern Europeans basically think our housekeeping and cleanliness standards are poor compared to theirs!

I think if you are fleeing a war zone, your home has been bombed to bits and your kids' life is in danger, then standards of housekeeping come pretty far down the list of needs.

I don't think they do. I think women and children need as much of a return to normality as feasible.

Family friends spent their young childhood living in a basement with family to avoid shelling, sniper attacks (Bosnian conflict). The adults went out of their way to maintain an immaculate, calm space there to attempt to destress the children and reduce the trauma of that.

FindingMeno · 11/03/2022 18:45

I wish I could. I have no room - already overcrowded.
Haven't rtft, but would tenants need to seel landlord permission too?

HerbertChops · 11/03/2022 18:50

Yes, we’re considering it. We have one small spare room but thinking dh and I will move into ds’s room (with double bed) and ds can move into the small spare leaving the ensuite loft room free. It has a super king and room for another double mattress on the floor or small kids beds/cot.

I work from home but in an office in the garden so am here during the day while still having a separate space to work.

My dh was a refugee himself and came to the UK 20+ years ago. He’s seen the horror of war first hand and still has the shrapnel in his arm. I’m sure we’d all find it difficult but I’d want to help.

Fizbosshoes · 11/03/2022 18:54

The stench of hypocrisy is over whelming.

And yes, I would offer to help. I have a property on the Dorset coast that I inherited from my grandparents which can accommodate at least one family. And not only will I be losing the income as a holiday destination but I will be footing all utility bill costs and providing food. I can also arrange employment too.

Sometimes you've got to stop shouting at everybody to do something and actually start doing it yourself. Otherwise, your just full of shit.

I'm not sure it's completely fair to call people hypocrites when you, yourself, are seemingly not doing the thing (some) people feel uncomfortable with, which is living with strangers in the same house.
If the question was "if you had a spare home that you weren't using, would you let refugees live in it?" Probably a lot more people would say yes. It's a different scenario.

Straighttalking1 · 11/03/2022 19:11

Agree @RedWingBoots
When is a refugee not a refugee

Kendodd · 11/03/2022 19:12

@implantreplace

You can listen on catch up
Sheelagh F around 2pm

No, you are wrong, listen back.
It was the grandmother in hospital.
No mention where the mother was apart from some speculation she had stayed in Ukraine to fight.
The lorry driver HAD NOT brought the child with him to the aunt in the UK.
The child was still in Europe and not in the care of any relatives because grandmother was in hospital.
The child COULDN'T just be taken to UK by lorry driver or anyone else into immediate care of aunt because she didn't have a Visa.

Bigsighall · 11/03/2022 19:17

Yes because I have the room and I can afford it. We’re in a lucky position and people in a position like us should try and do what we can.

implantreplace · 11/03/2022 19:26

[quote Kendodd]**@implantreplace

You can listen on catch up
Sheelagh F around 2pm

No, you are wrong, listen back.
It was the grandmother in hospital.
No mention where the mother was apart from some speculation she had stayed in Ukraine to fight.
The lorry driver HAD NOT brought the child with him to the aunt in the UK.
The child was still in Europe and not in the care of any relatives because grandmother was in hospital.
The child COULDN'T just be taken to UK by lorry driver or anyone else into immediate care of aunt because she didn't have a Visa.[/quote]
Just listened back

I never said he’d done this. I said he was planning to.

And he is!! Catch up. Circa 2pm

Grandmother in hospital
Mother absent but the speculated she’d joined army

TerraNovaTwo · 11/03/2022 19:31

I would have to get permission from my landlord first. So probably no.

Kendodd · 11/03/2022 19:33

@implantreplace
No, you said -
Hearing a man on LBC being lauded for bringing a 9 year old over here in his van. Her mother has a heart attack and in hospital so the 9 year old is alone. He was contacted “by her aunt on Facebook”

ajandjjmum · 11/03/2022 19:35

@newhomenewlife49

No, I don't have the space or money. It's always "us" expected to take them in, never "them".

Only a few months ago we weren't even allowed out parent in our home

That's hardly the fault of the poor Ukrainian people, who have been bombed out of their homes!
Mommabear20 · 11/03/2022 19:36

If we had the space, I'd be happy to take in children, but I don't think I could cope with an unknown adult in my house for 6 months

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