What therapy for anxious DD(11)

[Mercedes519]

DD is y6. She’s always been anxious and driven herself really hard to be ‘good’ and ‘perfect’ but it’s all taking its toll on her at the moment.

We do all the breathing and distraction techniques suggested and books etc. but it’s just not working enough.

I want to do something else and thinking of some professional help. We did get a CAHMS referral about a year ago after her physical anxiety symptoms were bad but I didn’t hear anything so I’m not counting on that. I’m fortunate to be able to pay but I don’t know where to start.

Has anyone got any recommendations of what has worked? Or where is even start in terms of finding someone or something?

A general psychologist I would think would be a great starting point if you're able to pay privately. Would imagine anxiety is a staple for psychologists. Perhaps GP if you want to explore medication, too?
Not sure how it works in the UK, would you need a GP to refer to psychologist anyway - you could also discuss medication whilst there... and they may wish to run blood tests to check (for example) she's not lacking in any vitamins, iron etc that may contribute physically.... perhaps check thyroid function etc. All the best!

We found a walk and talk therapist for my 11 year old who can get anxious about situations, can lack assertiveness and has sometimes been struggling going to school/clubs even though she's usually ok once there. Once a week they go for a walk in the woods, spot wildlife, get creative with nature alongside therapy and chatting. Its Earlyish days but we have definitely seen a difference

Look at counselling-directory.org.uk to get a feel for counsellors/what they specialise in/what qualifications they have. Call and chat to 2/3 to get a feel for them. A good counsellor will know that the relationship between them and client is key and these chats or an initial session to see how you get on then a decision as to whether you proceed are vital

Incorporating the body and movement into what you try will help. Anxiety is really strange book but Steve Haines might be useful

CBT is really good for middle childhood anxiety. Family therapy would be another option.

You can start with a CBT book called What To Do When You Worry Too Much.

Your GP would be a really good place to start. They will know what services are available locally. The other option is school. I've only experience of secondary school but it is worthwhile seeing what your school has available.

My DDs school has a counselling service which she was able to access very quickly once she was referred. She didn't want school to know to start with. She does have to miss lessons which can be an issue.

Two really good websites are Youngminds which is very user friendly. Also Anxiety UK. Think they both have parent helplines/webchat.

Another service that lots of people recommended is Kooth.

We haven't gone through CAMHS because the wait is so long and the online reviews of the local one are terrible!

Thank you everyone. I’ve picked up with school as a PP mentioned and they’ve suggested Kooth too.

I love the idea of a walk and talk. I don’t want this to be a huge thing but want to try to help her now as, let’s face it, life doesn’t get any easier.

I was wondering about the GP but it is hard to get an appointment and I don’t know if they would do any physical tests just because she’s a bit run down?

I think you could have a GP appointment to discuss your DD without her being there or being involved. That way she wouldn't have to have any physical tests if you didn't want any.

If your DD is run down. (I know mine is. Lack of sleep etc takes it toll) you could try a multi-vitamin. I've read Vit D deficiency can be a cause of anxiety. B vitamins involved too.

A walk and talk therapist does sound good doesn't it. I know my DD feels really uncomfortable sat face to face with her counsellor. Walking in the fresh air doing it sounds great!

There's a great book by Cathy creswell called Helping your child with fears and worries. It runs through cbt based interventions for children and young people with anxiety. It's really accessible and as a mental health professional working with children it is what we use with parents.

I won't know where you live, but there are often charities that can offer mental health support for children with mild to moderate mental health problems. Might be worth seeing what there is locally.

Your primary school should have a mental health lead that shoukd be able to signpost you to available services.

My daughter saw the mentor at school but she isn't a qualified counsellor and it didn't seem to help so we decided to look outside school. Walk and Talk is great as it isn't as intense as face to face can be and they can talk about things around them in nature which she enjoys. We haven't made a big deal about it as I don't want it to become a huge thing/issue- we have just said that she needs some extra help and this person is perfect to help her as that's her job.

CBT is probably the best bet. Could your daughter be referred to a local service providing tier 2 level (mild to moderate, rather than CAMHS which is for moderate to severe MH issues) offer. Alternatively a good private CBT therapist could be an option.

Check this out.

www.thrivingadolescent.com/