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Original poster

Did I do the right thing?

34 replies

anne2650 · 08/03/2022 17:17

Without going into too much detail, I contacted DD's school about her friend who is having a hard time at home and was expressing suicidal thoughts to DD. Parents know I said something as school contacted them right away and told them. Friend is going to receive counseling. DD was mad at me for telling school. We had become quite friendly with the parents but I think that may now be ruined. Should I have waited? Did I jump the gun?

OP posts:
Original poster
anne2650 · 09/03/2022 15:14

@ElvisWife

Op, as a mother who's son died by suicide you absolutely did the right thing!

Thank you for getting help for this young girl! No parents should go through what we are!

I'm so sorry 💐
OP posts:
FoodieToo · 09/03/2022 15:16

I’m just confused as to why you didn’t just go to the parents ? Surely they are the first port of call as opposed to the school ?

girlmom21 · 09/03/2022 15:25

@FoodieToo

I’m just confused as to why you didn’t just go to the parents ? Surely they are the first port of call as opposed to the school ?
If a child's suicidal and you don't know why you don't know if there's abuse or neglect going on at home. It's really important there's a neutral adult who can help them.
Original poster
anne2650 · 09/03/2022 15:29

@FoodieToo

I’m just confused as to why you didn’t just go to the parents ? Surely they are the first port of call as opposed to the school ?
The parents are why she is unhappy. Would you still have gone to them first? I feel I've done the right thing for the child but probably not for them. I'm still pissed at the school for not keeping my name out of it as it's now put me in an awkward situation.
OP posts:
Somanymistakes · 09/03/2022 15:31

I have a child who has sometimes expressed desire to self harm and suicidal thoughts.

I would be grateful you told the school if I was not aware. It's awkward as it's often a home issue and ours was our ongoing divorce. We went to CAMHS (fast tracked due to suicidal ideation) and had family counselling. It helped greatly.

I'm sorry there is fall out. You did the right thing 💯

I told the school and GP the day after he told me about it btw. They needed to know. We got help faster.

Somanymistakes · 09/03/2022 15:32

Also, I'd have asked you to tell your daughter she did the right thing telling you.

Original poster
anne2650 · 09/03/2022 15:42

@Somanymistakes

Also, I'd have asked you to tell your daughter she did the right thing telling you.
School have sung her praises to her for telling me which I'm pleased about. We were able to have a good heart to heart about it last night.
OP posts:
duckme · 09/03/2022 17:04

@Creameggs223

Well the child is now getting the help she needs that's great, but I would be annoyed if another parent took it upon themselves to tell the school without even telling me first. Would you be OK with it if it was the other way round?
Not all parents would have the contact details of other parents though. At least this way, the child is getting the help they need. Im aghast at the school identifying who informed them though!
sopebox · 09/03/2022 17:58

The main priority is the child's wellbeing and safety

Fuck everyone else

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