How do you know you've had too much booze and need to go to bed?

[vampirewellness]

I've just had this discussion with DH. I often think I'm having a lovely jolly time and we should pour another glass for everyone, but apparently my end game points are

Asking someone to sing a duet (especially meatloaf)

Wanting to reenact the Despacito music video.

Oversharing. Or struggling to see.

@MermaidEyes to be fair I have drunkenly ordered a few too many pairs of shoes in the past .

No idea. But so far when I wake up and don’t remember going to bed or how the night ended.

Like one minute I’m chatting away the next it’s 8am the next morning. Apparently I’m perfectly fine and hold normal Conversation but really I’m poof gone no idea wtf or how the fuck. You could tell me I owe you a £100 or that I stole a car and I couldn’t argue with you because I’d have no idea.

So I try to avoid that as best I can 😅

When I have to close one eye and squint to see my phone correctly....

When I’m sick usually.

But nowadays when I’m dizzy and talking crap

When I bust out my signature pissed handstand. It’s quite good to be fair

when its been a crap day at work and you have drank a bottle of wine in 30 minutes

When I think shots are a good idea or if I start hugging people and telling them that I think they're f brilliant.

I'm not much of a drinker, but I just get to a point where I know if I have any more I'll just start to feel dizzy and wonky, so I stop there, or at least give it a rest for a while/eat something and drink a non-boozy thing until I feel able to have some more.

@DrAddisonForbesMontgomery

When I have to close one eye and squint to see my phone correctly....

Definitely this!!

When I start thinking shots would be a really good idea.

Sometimes I see sense at this point and head for home. Sometimes I buy a round of shots and then bust out my finest dance moves. It can go either way.

When I feel like I need go to lie down in a darkened room or I'll puke.

When the room started spinning or I started seeing double, that was when I mustered enough common sense to bugger off home!

I don’t drink anymore & it’s been years and years since I felt like that, but you don’t forget that spinning sensation and just wanting to be sick🤢🥴

When you loathe karaoke but agree to belt out 'Say Hello, Wave Goodbye'. Sober up a bit in the queue and do it anyway .

When I sit on the toilet alone and the cubicle spins and I try to get myself together to act sober😶

Hiccups that will not go away with all the usual methods or being completely unable to articulate myself and knowing I look like a twat as a result.

PMSL at Rene & Renato

When I show off my moves to wuthering heights. Or worse, I decide my sleeping son looks sooooo cute on the monitor, miss him so much and think I need to wake him for a cuddle. Never actually gone through with that, but the mere idea that I need to sabotage my evening freedom from mad toddler is enough to make me realise I've lost it and go to bed.
I know I've had too much when, not only am I squinting to see phone, I also drop it on my face.

When I bounce off the walls

Shit, I want to sing Meatlof as a diet when I’m stone cold sober!

For me it’s going to the toilet but instead of sitting down normally I kind of thud down, like I’ve fell but I got there perfectly ok. Usually followed by me thinking ‘ahh shit, I’m drunk’

Followed by someone (usually me) yelling SHOTS!!! (Excellent chance I’m still peeing at this point)

When I'm recreating the Dirty Dancing final number in the kitchen and I'm convinced we can "make the lift"

The singing, and the belief that somehow alcohol has made me a good singer. Go from being unable to sing Frere Jaques to the soaring vocals of Unchained Melody

When I go to the loo and I fell asleep 😬 (rare)

My DH says he knows I’ve had too much when I tell him I love him