How can I support DV victim?

[Gardenista]

I don’t know the mum well, her 6 year old DD joined my daughters class this term and we’ve had weekly play dates. Mum has faced emotional abuse from her ex partner and is living in a refuge, signed off work, her DD is receiving counselling from the school. Her mums concern is that her daughter is repeating the abusive statements she has heard from her father back to her mother.
After a lonely half term the mum is planning to leave the refuge and go back home. Main reasons being financial - the refuge is £1200 a month, she earns £800 a month.
There has been no violence towards mum or child, but emotional abuse.
Mum is very isolated, unhappy in the refuge and wants her family back. She’s worked and saved for the last 10 years and is worried about losing the financial security for her daughter.
Refuge staff have said they are not used to advising ladies who are in work and have savings.
One advisor told her in her position she would go back to ex partner too.
It is not my place to tell her what to do (I am a divorced mum - left due to physical and emotional abuse but I’m in a much better financial position)
But how can I support her?

This is horrible.

I fled an abusive situation as well, and found that all the support available seemed to be for very low income women. It seems that there is an assumption that any with a job and financial resources will be able to sort themselves out.

I would think that the only thing you can do is listen. Perhaps (?) You could gently ask questions that make her consider what it means to go back, and to think twice about it.

(Such as: Have you considered what you will say to your daughter about moving back with Daddy? What kinds of things are you doing to make sure that you will be able to retain control over your finances if you go back?)

Does she have enough to put down a deposit on a flat? Most councils help with deposits now.

Why did she go to a refuge instead of renting?

Maybe help her with renting somewhere?

@gelatodipistacchio - thank you.
Mum has been very upset to hear her daughter repeating the abusive judgements from her partner - mum is useless etc. Daughter has been seeing a counsellor to address this. I said to her how will you deal with your daughter saying these things to you again? Not in a confrontational way but gently…