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Would you tell a prospective employer you’re pregnant?

26 replies

Creeeper · 25/02/2022 14:39

I’m currently 14 weeks pregnant and in stages of discussion with a company for a role. It’s finance but they have quite strong ethics and are all about doing the right thing.

I’ve had 3 rounds of interviews so far and got to give a presentation next week. After that, it’s a panel interview and then decision time.

I know I’m one of 3 at the moment. Mid- senior level.

Would you tell them about the pregnancy? Technically / legally I don’t need to buy something feels a bit misleading somehow.

OP posts:
PotteringAlong · 25/02/2022 14:41

No, I wouldn’t, because you can almost be certain you won’t get the job.

I agree with you that it feels morally uncomfortable, but I still wouldn’t say.

sunshineandshowers40 · 25/02/2022 14:42

No I wouldn't. But I'm not sure if I would continue with the interview. By the time you have given notice if offered the job, how pregnant would you be? It's a tricky one.

girlmom21 · 25/02/2022 14:42

I wouldn't.
I'd tell them when you've signed a contract.

Interested in this thread?

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parietal · 25/02/2022 14:43

no definitely not. It might bias them against you (even if they don't want to be biased).

A good employer would prefer NOT to know (to avoid bias) and a bad employer should not know.

Creeeper · 25/02/2022 14:45

@sunshineandshowers40

No I wouldn't. But I'm not sure if I would continue with the interview. By the time you have given notice if offered the job, how pregnant would you be? It's a tricky one.
I’ve just been told I’m at risk for redundancy so actually likely need a new role!
OP posts:
gogohm · 25/02/2022 14:46

Technically you do not have to but it would potentially start the relationship off really badly and you may find it is held against you. Just because something shouldn't happen it doesn't mean it doesn't!

Aroundtheworldin80moves · 25/02/2022 14:47

I wouldn't tell them if its a job that can be done safely in pregnancy.

I would be worried about maternity pay though.

Sprig1 · 25/02/2022 14:49

I wouldn't and as an employer I wouldn't expect you to tell me either. If you did then I would be in a v awkward position if decided not to employ you as you may then claim it was because of your pregnancy.

dipdye · 25/02/2022 14:49

HELL TO THE NO

dipdye · 25/02/2022 14:49

If you tell them, you won't get that job. Guaranteed

RetireReady · 25/02/2022 14:53

To be fair it's none of their business until you think about accepting the job.
It is a very uncomfortable position to be in and for honest people it doesn't feel right not to be upfront but there might be lots of reasons why you wouldn't want to say at this stage.

dogmandu · 25/02/2022 14:56

so if you to get offered this position, how long after you start will you work before you leave for having the baby?

As it's mid senior level , is this a management position that wíll need to be filled for the duration of your absence??

You are perfectly within your rights not to say anything but this is a two edged sword. I worked for many years close to HR in a large company in Europe and I know how disruptive this 'right ' can be for any company or department affected. IT is meant to protect mothers, but in fact it often does the opposite. I have known many managers who refused to hire women of child bearing age because they feared huge disruptions. It is illegal to do this and they would never have admitted it publicly, but this is what happened.

sorryiasked · 25/02/2022 14:59

Bear in mind you may not qualify for SMP in the new role depending on how long it takes for you to actually start with them.
It may be better to stay where you are with protected rights?

Creeeper · 25/02/2022 15:02

@sorryiasked

Bear in mind you may not qualify for SMP in the new role depending on how long it takes for you to actually start with them. It may be better to stay where you are with protected rights?
I definitely wouldn’t, I’d qualify for maternity allowance but if I’m made redundant that’s all I’d get anyway so I’m looking at interviewing now so I could at least do 5-6 months in the new role before going off
OP posts:
Creeeper · 25/02/2022 15:03

I have known many managers who refused to hire women of child bearing age because they feared huge disruptions. It is illegal to do this and they would never have admitted it publicly, but this is what happened.

This is exactly my concern but I would also feel quite dishonest having conversations about what I’d do for the rest of the year knowing I wouldn’t be there!

OP posts:
FairyCakeWings · 25/02/2022 15:05

Tell your current employer that you’re pregnant and then you’re protected from redundancy as much as possible.

dipdye · 25/02/2022 15:36

This is exactly my concern but I would also feel quite dishonest having conversations about what I’d do for the rest of the year knowing I wouldn’t be there!

^

OK... But what's the alternative? Being unemployed?

Which would make it hellish harder to get back into the workplace post mat leave -

Kerrie21 · 25/02/2022 21:00

No don't tell them, as pp said you will not get the job if they know.

You'd be better off saying you found out really late etc.

whysoserious123 · 25/02/2022 21:02

NO

They can't discriminate apparently BUT you won't get the job

wingscrow · 25/02/2022 21:04

If you tell them now you won't get the job...

Viviennemary · 25/02/2022 21:04

I know a lot of people think this is fine. I don't. I would take a dim view if somebody did this. I would never trust them.

Creeeper · 25/02/2022 21:13

@Viviennemary

I know a lot of people think this is fine. I don't. I would take a dim view if somebody did this. I would never trust them.
This is my concern. There was a thread a while ago when someone said that she ran a business and had an employee start, who was pregnant

The comments there were absolutely awful. Saying this pregnant woman was a liar, fraud, had misled them etc etc etc

OP posts:
OP posts:
Nevth · 25/02/2022 21:15

Well - you probably shouldn't, if you want the job, and I support your right to do so.

However, does it involve management responsibilities? I work in finance too, and even though my company has been very good with supporting employees, hiring good mat covers, etc, the individuals managed by recently hired staff who then go on leave always end up suffering when it comes to performance reviews and bonuses. The disruption is unhelpful (even when companies manage it well, like mine does), and it often takes some time for new, externally hired managers to advocate efficiently for the people who work for them.

I've had it happen to me, and seen it happen to others (even more so in organisations where transitions are not as smooth). I'm more senior now, but back when I was junior and as someone who doesn't have or want kids, I'd only apply for jobs where the managers/directors were older women or men. It's a really sad situation, but it had an actual monetary and development impact on my career.

whysoserious123 · 25/02/2022 21:18

Do what is best for you OP. The business will survive either way