If your kids are 6 and 9 (ish), what does your evening look like?

[meringue33]

Think we need a clearer household position on bedtimes etc!

I have two 9 year olds. During term time they come upstairs at 7:44 and brush teeth (already had showers and hot chocolate or a glass of milk). Then they get into bed and read around 8pm and it’s lights out at 8:30pm.
Fridays are the same as they are usually very tired. Saturday they stay up watching tv with us until 9pm.

School holidays are different, especially in the summer. Bedtime is 10pm but they must be in bed reading by 9:30.

I’m well past bringing up little ones but I very often have GC of various ages staying over. My GC similar ages to your GC… I collect them from school, call in the park and give them a fruit snack on return home. They watch TV as I prepare dinner. We eat dinner at the table. Grandad washes dishes as myself and GC play board games. 7pm is bath time. In bed, with a story, at 8pm. I don’t hear them afterwards.

The younger GC are a different kettle of fish though 🤨

What exactly are you struggling with?

Mine are 6 and 9.
Tea is finished at about 6pm. Kids go straight upstairs afterwards. Younger usually goes in the bath first while elder reads. Adult chats or reads to child in bath. Then they swap round and youngest reads in room while older baths with adult chatting. Then after the baths are finished they read until 730-745 and then they get kisses and lights out.

Mine are exactly the same ages and I struggle with bed times. Mainly since lockdown when time became irrelevant. I try and get them to to bed by 8 ish and then they're asleep 8.30/9.00 ish but In holidays and at weekends it can be anything from 9 to midnight. They will sleep in if they go to bed late. I should get 6 year old to bed earlier but he gets jealous so try and get him to bed while 9 year old reads. I've got so used to them being up late that I often go to bed when they do which I know isn't good but I feel like I've made a rod for my own back

We have 7 and 8. Upstairs about 7, brush teeth and wash, into bed, read, prayers, cuddle and chat about day then lights out between 7:30 and 8

I have a 6 and 9 year old. In termtime they go up anywhere between 6 pm and 7pm (on a hyper evening we know they will settle easier upstairs) however they are allowed to watch dvd until 8pm. Then ds1 reads but ds2 will fall asleep once the dvd has been switched off.

Basically bed time depends on frame of mind and their df calls every night at 7pm so to be fair they either go up before or just after. We have set routines that are aimed to settle. A story when they go up, a specific thing we do to ward off bad dreams, then at dvd switch off a routine with a stuffed animal that tells them to go to sleep (don't ask....I wish I'd never started it but stuck now).

I should explain though DS1 is asd so the routine has to be both flexible for his level of overstimulation but have enough fixed points to settle him as well as being fair and reasonable for ds2 who is neurotypical.

I should say the only divergence in holidays is that their dvd can stay on until 9pm but that's because we can't have too much change in holidays or ds1 would struggle

I only have one but a 9 year old. Dinner is between 5:30 and 6. Bit of tv after till 7 then up for a shower (every night) teeth and pjs in bed at 7:30 then reading to me or DH (we alternate) till 8 when it’s lights out.

What time are these 9 year olds who go to bed at 8pm waking up at??

I have a 6 year old and an 8 year old. 6 year old has reading in bed from 7.30pm, lights out by 8pm but can take half an hour to fall asleep. 8 year old is in bed by 9pm, lights out by 9.15pm. They're not up until between 7-7.30am though. My bf's 7 year old goes to bed at 8pm and is up at 6am.

I have one, nearly 9. In the week bedtime 7.30, Friday 9.30, Saturday 10. I think this is a bit late but DH said it to her once so I'm not sure we can go back. Thing is I like reading but can't until she goes to bed as she likes to watch masked singer or something. Which I don't mind watching with her but I'm usually ready for bed myself by then. DH having quite a few gigs with his band on Saturdays. Sorry I think I've turned my comment into a rant

One endless bowl of cereal followed by a four hour argument about why they don't have to go to bed yet while I slump further and further into my seat until i am basically sofa shaped as I compete with DP to see who can ignore them the hardest.

My 9 year old have lights out by 8:30 and fall asleep very quickly. I wake them at 7am, in the weekend they will sleep until 8:30-9. They need a lot of sleep and have always done. Their weeks are very active with sports and music so a lot of sleep is needed.

@FlamingoYellow

What time are these 9 year olds who go to bed at 8pm waking up at??

Mine wakes between 7 and 7:30am every day and on weekends knows to stay in his room till 8am reading.

7 and 9 year olds here, up to bed at 7:30. Teeth, wash and pjs into bed then independent reading for 15 minutes before bed.
I think other children tend to go to bed later but my kids are shattered by 7:30 and seem to really need their sleep.
(Showers are earlier in the evening and only every other night)

6 and 9 here.
Tea normally finished around 6:30. TV/screens until 7pm, pj's, teeth. 6yr old reads to an adult and then will have ten minutes of screen or play time in his room (we push for play time) and then story. He's normally in asleep in bed by 8. Potential ADHD so employing tactics to have as little screen time as possible as it just seems to make his behaviour worse. He gets up at 6:30am on a good day, bad days he can be up at 4:30.

9 year old gets playtime in her room til 8, then the big light goes off, lamp on and reads until 8:30/8:45. She's often still awake at 9pm but does eventually drop off.

Holidays/saturdays 9 year old plays in her room and goes to sleep whenever she feels like it. 6 year old regularly falls asleep before 8:30!

@FlamingoYellow

What time are these 9 year olds who go to bed at 8pm waking up at??

I have a 6 year old and an 8 year old. 6 year old has reading in bed from 7.30pm, lights out by 8pm but can take half an hour to fall asleep. 8 year old is in bed by 9pm, lights out by 9.15pm. They're not up until between 7-7.30am though. My bf's 7 year old goes to bed at 8pm and is up at 6am.

My 9 year old is nearly always asleep before 8pm and we have to wake her up for school at 7:20 every day without fail. On a weekend she usually get up around 8am, so a solid 12 hours!

Have an 8 and 10 year old but bed time has only got about 15 min later in the last couple of years. They go to bed at the same time. I almost can’t believe the 10 year old happily accepts this.

We both work so.
Home and homework whilst dinner made
Dinner 6ish. Bath is run whilst they are eating.
TV allowed after dinner and they alternate in the bathroom (we allow an iPad set up playing a show or they would fight over who leaves the tv to get in bath.)
We still supervise/ do teeth brushing and hair washing if required.

Head to bedrooms between 7.30-7.45.

If both of us are home (most nights) we take one each and have the kids read out loud. If only one we do a joint Storytime and we read to them.

Lights out 8ish. Maybe 15 mins later at weekends but they have early sports clubs.

Wow so many early bedtimes! 👏👏👏👏

My 9 yr olds evening is more:

7pm dinner
7.30 bath time with me reading story
7.50 child says is hungry and demands snack
8pm child demands another snack plus milk. Eats in slo mo and if asked to eat faster bursts into tears or wails “that makes me stressed”
8.20 child needs loo
8.30 child is in bed
9pm child comes down saying room is making weird noise or too hot or too cold etc
9.15 put child back in bed after cuddles
9.30 child reappears saying feels sad and doesn’t know why
9.40 put child back to bed after hug
Child prob falls asleep somewhere around 10pm

@DomesticatedZombie 😂

I have DD 7 and 9 and generally we're upstairs by 7:30 (clubs and dinner depending) and bed is around 8ish with reading / chatting until 8:30 when we leave them both to it, they turn their own lights off when ready. They get up around 7/7:30 Mon-Fri but at the weekends it's always 7 as they are quick to watch tv / tablets as they know they can get a good couple of hours in before we nag them to turn them off. I sometimes think they need more sleep, especially at the end of the week / term. Our evenings feel like they are getting shorter!!

6yo and nearly 9yo here. 9yo still waiting for an autism assessment.

9yo bounces off the wall until around midnight. DH is taking a shift atm. Everyone ends up cranky. Lots of bickering. 6yo gets disturbed a lot. So no evening. Ever. Then we have to drag her to school the next day while the attendance officer waits at the door like a fucking gargoyle. At least it's Sunday tomorrow.

DC 6 & 8, up at 7:15/30pm,pjs,teeth etc (do showers earlier if needed) story together then dc6 into bed and settle and sleep -try to do by 8 but usually 8:15. DC 8 reads for konger- usually lights off about 8:25/30.
Both have to be up by 7:15. Usually both already up sometimes wake dc6. Weekends help themselves to telly or tablet after 7:30 & one of us up about 8:15am

7 and 9.
Upstairs at 6, they play together until 7.45 then teeth and bed for 8.
If it's not school the day after they still go up at 6 and are allowed screens until 7.30 then play until 9.30 then bed.

Regarding what time they get up, I wake them for school at 7.40 and on weekends they tend to wake themselves around 8.30.

I have newly 7&10 yo. After tea they can play/iPad/TV/school reading/shower etc.
7yo goes to bed at 8pm after a story from us, 10yo is off all screens then and reads until 9-9.30pm.

9 and 7yo here. 5pm tea. 5.30 music practice/homework. 6.30 Bath (alternate nights for each child) teeth, story light out by 7pm.

Wake up at 6am. We're quite an "early" family in that Dh and I go to bed at 9!

The 9 year old often asks to go to bed earlier than the 7 year old.

Just a 7yo here.

As a rough guide, I aim for...
5-6pm - dinner at some point in this window
6-7pm - usually plays on switch or watches youtube
7pm upstairs for toilet time (history of constipation! find this routine helps!)
7.30 - playing in bath
8.00 - Bed, two stories, fannying around complaining about sore legs etc
8.30 lights off with audio book (no more that 30 mins of book playing). 8.30 is when I finally come downstairs.
He's pretty good at that point and usually sleeps, always ends up in my bed through the night, wakes somewhere between 7.00 and 8.00am.

The Xmas hols totally knocked the routine and now I regret relaxing the rules as its been a struggle to get him back into the above routine. I sometimes wonder if 8.30 is too late, but dont want him waking up much earlier than he does now.