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Original poster

Full time work balance

27 replies

Hangoverstruggles · 18/02/2022 19:43

Hi, if you work full time with young children do you or could you fit in exercise or time for yourself?

I work Monday to Friday, husband also 45 hours. I leave for work at 7am, and get in after collecting the children around 5:30/6 and have additional kids clubs on Wednesday and Friday.

I'm knackered but also spend all my time sitting down. I'm sluggish and constantly reaching for sugar to keep going. I know exercise is important but really struggle to fit it in. Am I making excuses? Do other manage it?

I know obvious answer it to get up at 5am but... and evenings are taken up with kids dinner, and getting them sorted (and spending a small amount of them)

Feel like life is relentless and there's no time to look after myself! Are all working parents in the same boat?

OP posts:
Pandoh · 18/02/2022 19:47

I prep as much as I can the night before because I find exercise easier in the morning, so although I have to get up early it's not as early as it might be if I hadn't prepped! I do lunches, lay clothes out, pack bags etc before DCs in bed and so as soon as they are can relax for a bit. The other option would be to maybe walk at lunch? Every hour or so do some stretches? It is hard, i think being organised is the key.

Loopytiles · 18/02/2022 19:47

I remember this, and exercised both days at the weekends and one morning in the week then worked late, while DH did the parenting. Also built walking into the commute.

TrueBuys · 18/02/2022 20:13

I try to go for a walk at lunchtime, even ten minutes fast walking in the fresh air is helpful.

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EileenGC · 18/02/2022 20:19

I don’t have kids but work 70-80 hour weeks so don’t have time to do much when I get home. I try to walk to work some days (50 min walk vs 30 min on public transport) so I can get some exercise in that way. The fresh air also helps a lot.

Most of the time I’m just utterly exhausted -physically or mentally - or jet lagged, so the only thing my body can manage is sitting on my bed with Netflix on.

Piper90 · 18/02/2022 20:21

I would be prioritising spending time with my children in your position. You could do activities with then which involve a bit of physical exertion (swimming maybe?)

Loopytiles · 18/02/2022 20:28
Hmm
ISeeTheLight · 18/02/2022 20:31

My employer allow some flexibility and I WFH so I go to a pilates class one day a week. It takes more than an hour (as have to get there and back) but I make the time up elsewhere, and they're not that bothered on hours work but on getting your job done. Could also go for walks etc during lunch.

I would also agree with doing exercise as a family - eg go to the gym whilst your kids have swimming classes etc.

DogsAndGin · 18/02/2022 20:35

I think it’s a tall order to have both parents working long hours. You are working very hard! Is it possible to go part-time?

Everythingsokreally · 18/02/2022 20:36

It’s really hard. If I’m honest, I didn’t do much until my son was about 4. Then, I realised I really missed it and started again. I think it wasn’t at that point that life felt a bit easier. For me, there was (and still is) no way around it other than to go at a time I don’t really want to. I did the get up at 5 thing for a while, but I hated it. I settled on going late, after dinner ans bed time - I am have often been the last one in the gym at closing! I don’t like it, but there aren’t really other options, so…

Phalarope · 18/02/2022 20:45

That’s relentless. Do you have long days or a long commute?
I have a short commute which I cycle (ticks the exercise box) but I also have the flex to work thru lunch hour and leave early - gives me half an hour to sort bag/get tea on/occasionally a sit down before I get the kids.
DH sorts them in the morning because I’ve already left.
I do often end up going to bed at the same time as 8yo though…

NellWilsonsWhiteHair · 18/02/2022 20:48

Exercise is really important to me so I prioritise it as my one thing that I consistently do for myself. I run before I start work, whenever I possibly can. If I leave it til later I just don’t have time regardless of how much I want to get outside at lunchtime etc. Pre covid I wfh two days a week and that was when I ran. These days I’m mostly at home so can mostly run more.

I’ve had phases of managing ten mins Pilates of an evening but it’s been harder to make that really stick.

Original poster
Hangoverstruggles · 18/02/2022 21:39

Thank you - it's interesting to hear how you have managed it.

My commute is only 10 mins but full time office hours for my role is 8-5 Monday to Friday with one 6pm finish. I tend to be at my desk for 7/7:30 everyday with only a brief lunch break so that I can finish at 4:45 to get to after school club before the next session kicks in (as this would then cost me another £40 per week for the two children!)

It isn't a very flexible company, despite me being fairly senior and having the tech to work from home. I think the culture is ingrained in me now and it's hard to shake off.

Until recently I was doing 32 hours (part time) giving me a whole day off a week but I went for a promotion into a new department and unfortunately was denied keeping the part time contract. I decided to go for it anyway as I really wanted the job. Hoping, when I find my feet in the new role, to request to reduce hours again but it's not a given in this company.

Husband does all drop offs but it doesn't really give me any extra time due to my long days.

Lunch time walk is a good idea, and I'm hoping I can restart couch to 5k when the evenings are lighter. Not sure how sustainable the working hours are, despite enjoying the job.

OP posts:
Lazypuppy · 18/02/2022 21:45

I wake up and log on/wfh until 8am. drop DD to nursery at 8:30am, then swim from 8:40-9:10, home and back online working from 9:30 through to 5/5:30.

Will be remote working pretty much permanently now which helps

jackfrosttoes · 18/02/2022 23:08

No I didn't manage exercise then, I did go to the closest gym round the corner post kids bedtime for a while but I agree it's really hard to fit it in/find energy for at that time of night.

My kids swim lessons were 20 mins, not time enough for a work out.

PinkPlantCase · 18/02/2022 23:28

I do the nursery drop off and walk there. One lunchtime a week I do a quick 45 minute walk and then at the weekend we try and do a long (2 hours ish) walk too.

I could exercise in the evening when DC is in bed but I’m too knackered for that 😂

eurochick · 18/02/2022 23:28

Exercise is the thing that went when I had a child. I just couldn't fit it in, plus I was knackered with full time work and a commute. I only managed it once lockdown happened - I used what would have been my morning commute time to take up running again. There are only so many hours in the day. It's really hard when the children are small.

HardbackWriter · 18/02/2022 23:33

I run 30 minutes in my lunch hour twice a week (and then have a longer run on one of the weekend days). It's obviously easier now I WFH but I did use to do it when I worked in the office too (we had showers in my office). It's the only way I can fit in exercise - and a big bonus is that I always have really productive afternoons after I've run!

LilyPond2 · 18/02/2022 23:53

My DC are young adults now, but when DS was a baby/toddler I worked hours that most people would consider full-time (despite being officially part-time). I didn't find the time to take regular exercise. I can actually remember going on a work trip during that time and getting to go swimming in the hotel pool. A colleague commented that I was grinning from ear to ear as I approached the pool! The reason for that was that getting to go swimming by myself was a rare treat.

Original poster
Hangoverstruggles · 19/02/2022 11:29

@LilyPond2 I have a couple of trips coming up and already thinking the same 😁

I had a great routine during lock down. I still went to work throughout but husband was furloughed, and even with the children at home we had so much more time to look after ourselves.

I do think both parents working full time is a challenging routine and physical & mental health will take a hit sadly....

Off to brave the weather now for a little jog 😁

OP posts:
breatheinskipthegym · 19/02/2022 11:52

Could you cycle to work if your commute is only 10 minutes? Family yoga session in the evenings with the kids via YouTube/app? Walk in your lunch break sometimes, or even start a workplace walking club?

Redlorryyellowlorryblue · 19/02/2022 12:57

It is difficult. We got a peloton last month and it’s so easy to get in 20-30 minutes exercise. I watch Netflix whilst in it and the time goes so fast. I appreciate this is an very expensive option.

I have never done a spin class before getting it but I’m surprised I’m enjoying it so much.

Redlorryyellowlorryblue · 19/02/2022 12:58

*on and a

ChocolateDigestivesMmmm · 19/02/2022 18:42

I work full time and so does DH. We both do a sport each. We only have one child though. We each get an evening a week to go to our clubs, while the other person does dinner/bath/bed. Plus I take a long lunch break one day a week to do my sport, and make up the time elsewhere, my work is quite flexible. So I exercise twice a week in total.
I also do squats and planks randomly around the house, for example while watching TV or getting ready for bed, as my sport requires leg and core strength.
At times when life gets really busy I skip club sessions for weeks, and can really feel the difference in my mental and physical health. I need that time to get away from the daily grind and do something I enjoy. If you can manage it, absolutely do carve out time to exercise, but pick an activity you love, otherwise it will feel like a chore.

Throwntothewolves · 19/02/2022 18:58

Plan it into your day. I have dogs so plan walks around whatever hours I'm working on any given day. It's harder in Winter as the days are shorter, but making it a definite part of my plan for the day is the only way to stay motivated. Same applies to the gym, classes, online exercise classes etc

elsirose · 21/02/2022 09:39

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