How soon is too soon for a new pet after loss of an old one?

[Pileonsally]

Our old cat died last week. We are all heartbroken but he was very old and had a lovely life. I cant bear our empty house with no cat.
Is a week too soon to get another kitten?
I suppose there are no rules? I feel a bit heartless towards my old cat??

kitten I did think exactly like that before I rushed into getting a new kitten after the loss of my dear cat, that it wasn't the same love, it would find a new love etc.

Unfortunately because I missed my old cat very much and the grief was still raw, I just wasn't in a place to fully love the new kitten because my heart was still pining for the old cat and looking back I wanted my old cat back (impossible, obviously) not a new kitten (or cat) but I couldn't distinguish that at the time. I thought "New kitten = heart healed" but it wasn't that simple.

Now I know better, I would never rush into getting a new cat too soon and the more I loved the old cat, the longer I would take to fully grieve before moving on. However, if I felt I had got over the loss quickly then I might move on a bit quicker but you have to be very honest with yourself. If you are still finding the loss of the cat directly very painful then it's best to process that first. It's very personal.

When it feels right for you .

When my first (girl) cat was PTS, I was desperate to fill the her space - she went on the Thursday, the following Monday I brought home another girl cat.

When my second (boy) cat was PTS it took me three months to get another boy cat.

What's important is that girl 2 and boy 2 (who are my present cats) felt like the right cats for me.

In short, there are no rules, and your late cat would only want you to be happy .

We've always had time between our cats and I miss the two we lost terribly, partly the last one.

But someone told me that by getting another rescue you are saving two; the one you rescue and the one that fills that space at the rescue.

@Honeyroar

Nothing will ever replace your old pet. That pet will always be in your heart and your memories. Your old pet knew you adored them.

I always think when a beloved pet dies they leave a little hole in your heart, but the next pet gives you their a heart to fill the gap. Your heart ends up a patchwork of all the pets you’ve loved.

You’ll love the next pet too, but still remember your other pet fondly. Don’t feel you’re disrespectful to your old pet.

I absolutely love this. Your heart is a patchwork of all the pets you have loved. Thats beautiful and so true. Its given me a lot of peace that sentence. Thank you.

Thanks everyone for your opinions and experiences.. im ringing round some rescue centres today!

@Pileonsally you do know that you’ll have to do the ‘what shall I call my new cat’ don’t you? 🥰🥰

I agree with pps. When my dm’s cat died, she got two kitten siblings from a rescue centre within weeks. I was surprised (mainly at getting two after a lifetime of one cat at a time) at the time, but it worked out well. They are nothing like the cat that died so not a replacement, and my mum couldn’t bear not to have a cat in the house.

I was only able to wait 5 weeks between our old cat dying and adopting our girl. For me, a home is only a home when it has a cat.

Our DCat was very old and we knew he didn't have many years left. We got a kitten while he was still with us, so that our DS didn't have to deal with the empty house feeling when the time came. Kitten was a year old and on the day we took DCat to the vet, kitten/replacement cat ran away. We went from 2 cats to none and were absolutely devastated. 2 weeks later we picked a bonded pair of cats up from the cat shelter. Same day, kitten came home!

All 3 are bonkers in their own way and very much loved. Do what feels right to you.

I only lasted 3 weeks. But my boy was killed in front of me by a speeding car. Getting my girl definitely definitely helped with the grief. 100%. We then got another boy about 6 months after that.

Neither of them have replaced my precious boy. Not one bit. But the house was far too empty and I needed another cat.

Up till present Ive always had two dogs, a spare ! Have an 11 year old now and sdesperately want another but circumstances mean its not an option. Ive always had several animals, dogs, g. pigs, horses, and feel a bit bereft. One time we lost our only remaining dog we said no more, but after 3 weeks couldnt stand it any longer and thereafter got two.
Its how you feel, dont worry about what other people think you should do

Our girl died last October, still don’t think I’m ready for a new one, I just compare every dog to her and wouldn’t be able to give a new dog what it needs at the moment.

I just want her back, not a different dog.

@CoastalWave

I only lasted 3 weeks. But my boy was killed in front of me by a speeding car. Getting my girl definitely definitely helped with the grief. 100%. We then got another boy about 6 months after that.

Neither of them have replaced my precious boy. Not one bit. But the house was far too empty and I needed another cat.

How did you deal with this? I am struggling really badly with loosing my cat last week. I miss her terribly

I think it depends. I think getting another cat is a more straightforward process. A dog needs more consideration I feel. Whatever, the important thing is making the decision with a sound mind. We currently have our first dog and I have already said to my dh that when she goes I don't want a surprise puppy straight away. I want to grieve and then make a level-headed decision about the next one. Ie decide with my head, not heart.