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Original poster

First date with guy from online dating app..

11 replies

Firstdatewoes9 · 13/02/2022 23:50

Hi mumsnet.
So I've been chatting to this guy now for a couple of weeks. We have lots in common, he's very respectful and I like how he looks in pictures. We both have kids, he has his every other weekend and I'm a single parent to my child.
He's asked about taking me out for a date, and whilst I'd like to, I'd have to arrange childcare.
I work in a place where the public can access and the office in which I work in is a security carded entry office.. Would it be ok to maybe ask him to meet me in the reception of the public place I work in and we could go for a coffee in the coffee shop on site? He finishes work well before me also so could get here before I needed to leave.
It just saves the hassle of arranging childcare if we don't fancy each other lol, sort of a trial date!
I have no problem with him knowing where I work as its a public service I work for but just wondering if it'd be odd to ask him?

OP posts:

cheekychaplin · 13/02/2022 23:57

I would t go on a date with you tbh. I would expect someone to make an effort and 'come to the coffee shop at my work' isn't it. Sorry.

cheekychaplin · 13/02/2022 23:57

Urgh. Wouldn't

Nostrings457 · 13/02/2022 23:59

I think that would be perfectly fine. Childcare for many SP is few & far between. What’s wrong with a coffee date even if the location is close to work

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NannyGythaOgg · 14/02/2022 00:01

Absolutely fine for a first meeting

LocalHobo · 14/02/2022 00:02

Is it a location equally convenient for him? Personally I see nothing wrong in an informal coffee meet up before either of you commit to a big night out (!) but it's a bit off if he has to travel far for what is half an hour in your works canteen.

EmmaMaya · 14/02/2022 00:05

I think its fine and wise!

As a single parent I know how challenging childcare can be!

SpaceRaiders · 14/02/2022 00:06

You’re setting the bar pretty low. I’d never agree to a coffee date, much less in my place of work. Book a babysitter, or sleepover at relatives house and go out properly.

Onelifeonly · 14/02/2022 00:06

How much time do you get for lunch? Could you meet somewhere nearby for a sandwich? Although I don't think your idea is that bad unless it's a huge journey for him.

EBearhug · 14/02/2022 00:08

Lunchtime dates can work well, as they are time-limited, which is important if it doesn't go so well, and if it does, you'll meet again. But if this is the only time/place you can do, how will this actually work for consequent dates? I've had a couple of men ask if I have time for dating, and I'm not half as restricted as you. (Plus, if they appear to be worth it, I can cancel a lot of other stuff I do, but no one's got to that point yet.)

Original poster

Firstdatewoes9 · 14/02/2022 00:13

The location of where I work is convenient for him also. It's not an excessive drive.

OP posts:

Peachtoiletpaper · 14/02/2022 00:21

Is there a coffee shop nearby you could go to? I like your thinking in general, having an informal meetup first, but wouldn't love the idea of going to someone's workplace. It would just feel pretty low effort on their part, also I'd question their sense of boundaries, inviting a stranger for a date where they work.

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