If you have a friend for play date, do they bring sweets/chocolates?

[Hopss]

I don’t mean if it’s a mum/toddler play when the general etiquette is to bring cake ! But if it’s older kids (5+) coming round at weekend or after school? I am finding kids are always sent with sweets and chocolates. So things like randoms/sour patch/caramel bite size or maybe pack of cakes. I find it a bit frustrating as I feel obliged to give them these to share (I do try to ration a bit so they don’t get all of it ) then they are high on sugar and more unlikely to eat dinner. I also find we are reciprocating and doing the same now as my kid insists it’s what the etiquette is and he feels bad arriving without anything.

What? My DC are always on play dates and I seem to have kids over a lot, but have never received a kid with sweets to share. Most of the kids we know eat sweets on Saturday only, but even on Saturday play dates I'm not aware of sweets being shared.
Interesting.

Youweregr8inlittlemenstruators see that sounds sensible. They are here to play not eat sweets! It isn’t really necessary. I am pretty sure we didn’t as kids, just a couple of custard creams from hosts mum!

Youweregr8inlittlemenstruators, are you uk?

It wasn't the norm when my kids were little. I would find it quite annoying, I think. Mine did have treats, but I preferred it to be at my discretion.

Is there really no such thing as a sugar high? My kids go bananas after eating sweets/ice cream/ cake etc. at birthday parties all the children seem to get a lot more unruly after eating the cake, and chase each other round and round! I just assumed it was the sugar😳

Sometimes we have two or three kids at a time and they all bring stuff 🤦‍♀️ My kids think it would be like turning up to a party without a birthday present now!

Straight from school, no. On the weekend, a packet of donuts of a bag of crisps to share is pretty standard.

@Hopss

Youweregr8inlittlemenstruators, are you uk?

I’m U.K. and it doesn’t happen in my area. My 8 and 6 year olds have many play dates and we’ve never encountered it.

@itshappened

Is there really no such thing as a sugar high? My kids go bananas after eating sweets/ice cream/ cake etc. at birthday parties all the children seem to get a lot more unruly after eating the cake, and chase each other round and round! I just assumed it was the sugar😳

There is no scientific reason for children to become ‘high’ after sugar.

Nope - never happened here, kids usually come straight from school so I wouldn't send them to school with sweets.

If it was a weekend - maybe send with bag of cookies or small cakes but very rare. However if we have a playdate then I will try and get something sweet for after their meal.

I never turn up at anyone’s house, play date or not, without a little something…cake / biscuits / bottle / plant / flowers. Maybe I’m old-fashioned.

@RaisinforBeing

I never turn up at anyone’s house, play date or not, without a little something…cake / biscuits / bottle / plant / flowers. Maybe I’m old-fashioned.

Would you send your kids to school with a plant to take to their friends house at an after school play date, though?

@RaisinforBeing exactly this.

I wouldn’t bring sweets but I always bring a packet of biscuits or something. I feel rude turning up empty handed!

I’m in my mid 40s though, so maybe I’m being old fashioned and bringing a little something is not a thing these days 🤔

Somewhereoverthechipshop I am talking when only kids are involved though. It’s different if parents coming too. Not sure why! I would bring packet biscuits if I was staying for cuppa

@somewhereoverthechipshop

I wouldn’t bring sweets but I always bring a packet of biscuits or something. I feel rude turning up empty handed!

This is about children going to their friends for play dates alone (after school etc), not adults.

@itshappened

Is there really no such thing as a sugar high? My kids go bananas after eating sweets/ice cream/ cake etc. at birthday parties all the children seem to get a lot more unruly after eating the cake, and chase each other round and round! I just assumed it was the sugar😳

It's a birthday party. Kids get giddy and excited at parties.

Wow we have kids over a lot and no they don't bring sweets. I'd find that abit weird. An "after school snack" is a common event here but I would provide that (varies from hummus and breadsticks to veg/fruit but always a biscuit/something fun too).

We don't really do bringing biscuits (taking CAKE? Noone brings me a cake? That's onviously your norm OP?) that seems a bit formal for just having a friend/kid over after school

Seem to be a bit of a split between “yes we do that and what’s the problem” answers and “no that’s weird never heard of it” !

No

If a child comes over for a play date, I'll provide them and my DC with healthy snacks.

I'd be really uneasy if a child came over with sweets and chocolate.

@ShallWeTalkAboutBruno

Wow, seems it is a thing everywhere except here! Mine have had hundreds of play dates and no one has ever brought sweets, and we’ve never sent them!

Yep, it wasn’t my experience either. Only time my DC took sweets was if they were going to a sleepover.

DD has issues with her weight and I find this kind of thing is a constant problem

Not something I've ever experienced, whether they came after school or at the weekend / in the holidays.

The child coming to play, does just that - come to play. It isn't a party. No present needed.
With 3 dc I've had a lot of different children round and never had anyone bring anything, and none of mine have every taken anything when they go to other friends' houses either.