Crazy neighbour stories

[IdentityChangeToday]

I love a good crazy neighbour story and I’ve got a good one but I’ve had to name change.

Anyway, about 5 years ago, we had a patio laid right up to the boundary wall. This is important because obviously patios can’t go under walls. Anyway, two years later we received planning details from the council that the neighbour was going to be building an extension. All fine. He informed us that he was going to be knocking down the wall and placing scaffolding on our gorgeous patio as part of the build. We said a big fat NO. Anyway, that was forgotten and life moved on.

Finally, the wall came down. One day, I’m sat in my office and I hear heavy machinery so go outside. It’s my neighbour CHOPPING UP THE EDGE OF MY PATIO!!!

I asked him what the hell he was doing and he yelled the following:

• You’re a bellend
• We never wanted you here
• You’re fat (to my husband)
• I’ve got every right to do this
• All I want to do is make my home bigger (at the expense of making our home smaller)
• Get back into your house (we were on OUR patio)
• You’re a tosser

And the most ridiculous…‘You’re making me feel like a criminal for wanting to have a nicer home!’

We’ll stop causing criminal damage them mate!

I just couldn’t believe it. Has anyone got anything better?

IdentityChangeToday Oh my god! Did you call the police? Did they repair the patio? Need more details!

Not as criminal as your story but we lived next to a woman obsessed with having an empty house.

She had the suite taken out the downstairs loo so it was just an empty room that she kept the door shut to.
Had the kitchen ripped out and replaced with just 6 cupboards, sink, fridge and cooker.
Wouldn't have anything on the worktop. If she used the kettle it was put back in the box and in the garage..... as with all small appliances.
Never did a weekly shop. She went to the shop for that days food so no food was kept in cupboards or the fridge. All her fridge had was eggs. Nothing else.
Would hoover every day at 5am and 5pm.

What happened @IdentityChangeToday?

@MrsTrumpton

IdentityChangeToday Oh my god! Did you call the police? Did they repair the patio? Need more details!

They didn’t repair the patio and we couldn’t report it to the Police as weren’t far off a house sale so would have had to report it as a neighbour dispute. We just had to hope that they didn’t chop too much and repaired the wall quickly. It was pretty horrid I can tell you that much. Then his husband got involved, telling me that ‘this was perfectly acceptable’ ‘I shouldn’t have spoken to him like that’ ‘I was rude’ Both my husband and I were truly gobsmacked. We lived in a terraced house and had heard the two of them arguing so the husband was clearly used to his temper though.

*repaired the wall to cover the damage I mean

During lockdown my new neighbours had a party, very loud and woke my 1 year old.
I knocked on the door to ask them to turn the music down, said they would then it got louder. Knocked again and the husband came to the door shouting, demanding to see my tenancy agreement, telling me he pays for me to live there as i’m on benefits!
Shouted back that I actually work full time and pay all my bills and he tried to swing at me! Wife rushed out to hold him back and apologised profusely.
Not a great impression… the next day I went to empty my bins and they had put all their rubbish from their illegal party in there!

Promptly took the bags out and put them in front of their door.
Nothing has been said since 😂

We have a similar one. Neighbours were doing a massive rebuild project they were about 9 months in and came round to ask if they could put some scaffolding on our patio for a month.

Usually I would have said that was fine (with a caveat that they replace the patio if it gets damaged), unfortunately we were about 2 weeks into having our garden re-done and needed the side return for access for the digger, roller and all the rest of the stuff that was being taken through. We couldn't use the other side as it's stepped and too narrow.

They weren't happy and sent a party wall notice and then a surveyor - who, when we explained the situation, told them they had to wait. Then, our garden people called me to say that that a large scaffolding lorry had turned up and there was a sort of stand off.

Our garden was due to take 4 months, but over-ran. They eventually had to just change the design of the property slightly.

I suspect, we are not going to be friends.

@underneaththeash

We have a similar one. Neighbours were doing a massive rebuild project they were about 9 months in and came round to ask if they could put some scaffolding on our patio for a month.

Usually I would have said that was fine (with a caveat that they replace the patio if it gets damaged), unfortunately we were about 2 weeks into having our garden re-done and needed the side return for access for the digger, roller and all the rest of the stuff that was being taken through. We couldn't use the other side as it's stepped and too narrow.

They weren't happy and sent a party wall notice and then a surveyor - who, when we explained the situation, told them they had to wait. Then, our garden people called me to say that that a large scaffolding lorry had turned up and there was a sort of stand off.

Our garden was due to take 4 months, but over-ran. They eventually had to just change the design of the property slightly.

I suspect, we are not going to be friends.

I’m thinking your suspicions may be correct 😆

Does anyone remember the ‘puddles’ MNer? I often wonder how she’s doing

Ooh what’s ‘Puddles’ all about?

Wasn't the puddles one made up?

Mind you, I spent 4 months this year with puddles of raw sewage in my garden, when the neighbours septic tank (located underneath my garden) overflowed. Even when it backed up out of their toilet, they couldn't be asked to get the thing emptied until environmental health forced them to.

Insane cesspit man tried to insist that my sewage was somehow filling their tank, which led to a barney with my landlords and all sorts of shenanigans.

My next door neighbour has some kind of MH issue.
The last time I saw her she was running round her garden screaming and punching herself in the head.

We used to live in a cul-de-sac of maisonettes. All the other residents were retired, mostly spinsters and widows.
They never missed an opportunity to moan about something.
My upstairs neighbour was an elderly lady who was very noisy, shouting on the phone, flushing her loo through the night, putting her washing machine on at 5am to get the cheaper electricity.
All normal living noise, but was constantly moaning about our noise.
We both worked during the day and our children were generally good sleepers.
One day she came banging on our door complaining about us constantly slamming our doors all morning.
When we invited her in to show her that actually all our doors had been removed because they were glass and we didn't want any accidents with the children, and hadn't yet replaced them, she back tracked and said she meant yesterday. The doors had been off for a week.
The front garden had no divider, next door used to mow hers, and then go on her knees and snip any offending bits of grass from our side with a pair of scissors.
We had an oak tree at the bottom of our garden, and the neighbours both sides moaned constantly about the leaves falling. My husband used to go on their gardens and cleared them up but they still moaned.
One day I was in the back garden with my son who was about two. There was a sudden downpour, we rushed in and before I could shut the door, the upstairs balcony which jutted over my door collapsed, with debris flying into my kitchen and knocking my door off the top hinge.
She came to my door, I was expecting her to see if we were ok, instead she shouted at me because my oak tree had caused subsidence to the upstairs flat.

Growing up I had a bonkers neighbour, she had no flooring in her house , nothing all the walls and just the bare furniture. She used to get up early in the morning to bleach the entire flat every day. She the started bleaching the balcony that was the access to our flats and went loopy if any of the kids walked on it. She used to throw buckets of bleach at any animal but the final straw was when she threw a bucket of bleach at us kids for walking up the steps to our flats. The adults rang the police on her and they had a serious word with her. She was absolutely bonkers. She even threw her husband out Christmas eve because he came home late and the poor man ended up spending Christmas with us.
Funny thing is that she moved shortly before we did and her new house is nothing like that and she even has a dog that she loves.

Puddles was made up! Very dedicated to the lie though.

All of our neighbours hate each other. I've never lived anywhere quite like it. My next door neighbour has taken to staring at me whenever I'm outside. She has CCTV so I just smile and wave!

I have a glared too. I’ve never experienced anything like it. She will just stare and stare with a hateful expression. I just saw her at the supermarket and she did it there too.

@SquarePeggyLeggy

I have a glared too. I’ve never experienced anything like it. She will just stare and stare with a hateful expression. I just saw her at the supermarket and she did it there too.

My over the road neighbour used to glare at me. I didn't actually know as he only did it when my back was turned and I was walking down the drive. After I was told he did this (others in the house told me), I used to turn around about halfway down the drive and blow him a kiss.

He stopped glaring shortly after 😂