Could I try for a special birthday celebration

[FeelingOldandAlone]

Namechanged. I am 50 next year, and have, for the past few weeks, been longing to organise a special party for myself - which I know sounds really 'I'm all that' but let me explain

My 16th and 18th I was living in (separate) children's homes with no family contact. My 21st I was in my first abusive relationship living on my own in a tiny 1 bedroom council flat with no money for furniture let alone birthday celebrations. My 30th I was in my 2nd abusive relationship - I left a year later. My 40th my DD was seriously ill in hospital for most of that year.

I am long term single (by choice). I have no friends due to mental health difficulties and very limited family (previous foster parents). In fact, my last meal out with friends was around 2011 and was with a group of Mn'ers - most of whom have left MN and we havent been in touch for years now.

I am in declining health myself now, so am not sure if there will be any other 'special' birthdays. I just feel like I would like a time to provide food, drinks, good company, a bit dancing and such like - and for once for it to be mine. I think part of this is also to do this for my DDs.

Does this sound completely narcissistic? If not, how on earth could it be possible when I don't have anyone to invite

Thanks for reading the pity party!

For goodness sake, do it!!

Of course throwing a party isn't narcissistic, bless you. Just invite everyone you know. Do you know any other single people who might enjoy a party? Even people you haven't been in touch with lately might like a reason to get together.

Provide plenty of booze and I'm sure it'll be good!

I think you should definitely celebrate.

However, it might be nice for you if you could rekindle some old friendships, or even make new pals. Do you feel up to doing this?

Go on a city break for a couple of nights just you and DDs. Stay in a nice hotel, eat great food, go to bars with music and dancing, make memories!

Have the celebration you want and enjoy it!

@emmathedilemma

Go on a city break for a couple of nights just you and DDs. Stay in a nice hotel, eat great food, go to bars with music and dancing, make memories!

Oh we are doing this as well

@gobbynorthernbird I think I am up for trying to make new friends, I just dont know how. Or once I meet people, how to engage them in a friendship.

@Valkyrie40 I literally have no friends, no old school friends as changed school so often (each time I was moved placement), and it's only the past few years that I have been on my own that I have had the opportunity to make and keep friends - but my ill health kept getting in the way. I don't work (full time carer for disabled DD). I was thinking of trying to find some voluntary work but again, that is health dependent.

Thanks for the replies

@Sirzy

Have the celebration you want and enjoy it!

There would only be 5, maybe 6 of us. That's not really the celebration I want, but maybe its the one I deserve?!

yes celebrate if you are near me I would be so privelleged to come but either way please pm me anytime our histories are very similar

@labazslovesliving

yes celebrate if you are near me I would be so privelleged to come but either way please pm me anytime our histories are very similar

Thank you for the offer of a pm, that's very kind. I'm sorry you have a similar backstory though.

Could you maybe find something where you go as a group to a bigger event? Like they do Christmas party nights where you can book just a table but there would be lots of other people there. Round here (I’m in Scotland) some of the hotels host dinner and ceilidh nights (mostly aimed at tourists but there’s no reason why a local couldn’t go) which are a similar set up.