expectation for guests to re-make sofa??

[LottieGarbo]

Went for a social gathering at an acquaintance's house (think book-club type thing), we gathered in her living room and some of us sat on the sofa. When we got up to leave, she asked if we minded re-making the sofa - so moving the cushions back to their original places and straightening the throw.

We did so as it's no big deal, but it got me thinking if this is a normal part of going to someone's house and have I missed something?!
Haven't been to the homes of others very much due to lockdowns so it really made me do a mental double take.

I would probably have done it without being asked.

@Whitefire

I would probably have done it without being asked.

Maybe I am rude then!

It’s weird

Maybe, or she can put a bedsheet on top and then take it off and wash it.
There were a lot of “interesting” ideas on MN since March 2020.

@greenlynx

Maybe, or she can put a bedsheet on top and then take it off and wash it. There were a lot of “interesting” ideas on MN since March 2020.

How intriguing - I don't know whether I'd bother having guests round if I needed to wash the sofa cushions afterwards.

It probably took her longer to explain where she wanted you to place each cushion, than it would have taken her to do it herself.

Weird.

I agree. Of course, it might be something different but if it’s new approach on her side I would suspect it’s Covid related.

@LottieGarbo had you made them in to a fort in the middle of the room*

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

I would have burst out laughing if I'd been asked which would have made it worse!

@LottieGarbo

No, no disability, no newborn - her children are in their late 20's, was very much a 'oh would you mind just re-making the sofa' as we got up and then she just explained how the cushions and throw should be.

My SIL would do this. She is autistic. In her mind you messed up the sofa , so you must tidy it and it must be tidy before you leave the house.

I always re make my sofa after people sit on it

I wouldn't ask them though , unless it was a partner. I also wouldn't do it in someone else's house I know people like it done a certain way, with the exception of certain very close friends who I know how they like it

@HoliHormonalTigerlilly

* *@LottieGarbo had you made them in to a fort in the middle of the room

🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣🤣

Or a pirate ship. Or an island with a palm tree 🌴

As someone else mentioned autism, I am autistic which is probably why I am always straightening my pillows and throws, basically as soon as the sofa has finished it's use. Even multiple times a day when it makes sense to just wait to the end of the day. I'm just too much of a socially anxious autie to possibly even consider asking anyone else to do so

Super wierd .

I would have left her house feeling like I hadn't been welcome at all.

I wouldn't want to go back either.

@iklboo

I always take a vacuum cleaner (cordless stick sort) when visiting friends or attending a job interview and do a quick 'whizz-about' prior to leaving. I thought everyone did?

Is that all? I completely redecorate the house from top to bottom, re-carpet and fit new windows. You're not getting an invitation to mine if you're so slap-dash!

I take a pop up conservatory in my handbag ( Louis Vuitton neverfull. Cos it's never full obvs ) in case there are unexpected guests and more space is needed.

That is really odd. I wouldn't ask my guests to do that! If I were the guest, I probably would just tidy it up out of courtesy but I wouldn't expect the host to ask me to do it.

I would feel awkward to ask for a drink in someone's house when I didn't know them very well so I guess I would feel awkward to re-do the sofa as it seems a bit presumptuous but maybe some people feel it's rude not to!

She’s weird. I am someone who would be itching do it straightaway but I wouldn’t dream of asking guests to do it for me, that’s so weird

[quote saltandpepper234]@BliainNua so many people DO NOT just sit there. They like to pile cushions up in a corner or pick them up and hug them. We used to have a throw but I couldn’t stand the way people couldn’t just sit on the sofa without pulling it down so I got rid[/quote]
I move cushions and will often use a blanket when visiting family. They are there to use. I put it back how I found it when I leave.

I would feel weird if people started putting the sofa all back together, I actually prefer it if people don't clear up anything if they come round, only because if I invite them round then I like to clear up myself being the host and all

I think people's responses to this have been quite mild. I actually think it's breath-takingly rude. I cannot imagine a situation in which I would EVER ask a visitor to tidy up after themselves like this. Has the whole host/guest concept gone completely out of the window because people are so worried about their fucking sofa cushions?

Odd

Poor hostess unless she had a bad arm or back (which she should have explained).

Personally, if I'm at someone's house that I don't know very well/just getting to know them, then I would tidy up after myself, straighten cushions or throws or hand over a glass etc. I wouldn't go and wash my glass or traipse round their house putting things away but I would hate for anyone to think I was messy (even though I am!) and that I'm disrespectful of their belongings and possibly talking about me behind my back.

In my own house, if I had anyone over and they started straightening the cushions I'd tell them to leave them it's fine as I'd hate to think they were worried I'd find them rude for not doing it.

I don't understand my own logic to be honest but I suppose it's about my own expectations of myself.

Unless you and the other guests had chucked everything on the floor, she is batshit. I wouldnt have had a clue what she even meant. I thought this thread was going to be about a sofa-bed!