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Original poster

Sister and her mental health

12 replies

arghhhhwhattf · 29/01/2022 11:06

Sister is playing up again. My moms having to go over and try and sort her out, again! She's an alcoholic and she tried to commit suicide last year. Was on life support and she still continues to drink. Apparently she's been up all night drinking and is going mental now screaming apparently threatening her fella with a knife. Not sure how fried that part is ? I don't know what the point of my post is, just to rant I spose because I'm sick to my back teeth of this shit happening ! She won't ring her mental health team because she's saying she's just tired!! But she's tired because being up all night drinking and whatever else she's done !

OP posts:
Original poster
arghhhhwhattf · 29/01/2022 11:08

Just don't know what to do. She doesnt seem to want to stop drinking or help herself. She has a young teen daughter who is listening to all this. Her fella is at a loss for what to do anymore and we're none the wiser either. I told my mom to just call the police but she's terrified of the implications of that

OP posts:
MiamiBeach104 · 29/01/2022 11:58

I'm really sorry to hear what you are going through. My dad was an alcoholic. Realistically there is very little you can do about it unless she wants to herself. I think your mum/her husband should just call the police. I know it's not pleasant but that's you have nothing else to do especially if she's threatening people with the knife. If her husband leaves and takes the kid that might be a wake up call for her. Sorry not being more helpful but she's an adult and you cannot force her do things. If that's how she wants to live just detach yourself emotionally from her.

Original poster
arghhhhwhattf · 29/01/2022 13:47

@MiamiBeach104 thank you for your reply. I get where you're coming from and the last few months I have detached as much as I can but I still worry because she's my family, I love her unconditionally but if I'm honest I don't like her as a person anymore. She is argumentative and aggressive, can't take her anywhere without her getting into an argument or a scrap. It's bloody embarrassing.
She has drink drive today to go and get more alcohol and laughed in my moms face when she tried to stop her.
She has come back and promised to get help and as soon as my mom left she told her fella to F off, to go and get her some more booze and that she's going out tonight. So yet again she's told my mom what she wants to hear to get her off her back.

OP posts:
NannyGythaOgg · 29/01/2022 15:58

Unfortunately it is up to her what she does with her body. Even though her choices are not good ones.

Drink driving is in a different league; it's not only her own life she is putting at risk. I would definitely report that. Repercussions from the police are far better than other potential consequences.

Original poster
arghhhhwhattf · 29/01/2022 16:17

Yes I'm starting to feel like I should just give up to be honest, and i know it sounds bad but the old saying goes you can't help someone who doesn't want to help themselves is so true !

She is in denial. You ask her what's making you sad, she says she's not sad she just doesn't know how to cope. But what can't you cope with ? I don't know... you just go round in circles. And if you mention the alcohol dependency she completely dodges it and ignores you.

I'm fuming she drunk drove but I know it's not the first time and won't be the last. Her car is full of bottle caps apparently

OP posts:
chinateapot · 29/01/2022 16:19

That’s really sad. Do you know if she has any social services input - I’m worried about the safeguarding issues for her daughter.

BitcherOfBlakiven · 29/01/2022 16:20

Where are SS in all this?! Her child should not have to be in this situation, disgraceful

ThirdElephant · 29/01/2022 16:21

Give her daughter your number and make sure she's got the means to contact you if she ever feels scared or needs someone to talk to. Make it clear this is anytime of the day or night.

IzzyD0ra · 29/01/2022 16:21

You need to phone the police when she's drink driving.
You need to phone the police when she's threatening people with a knife.

BitcherOfBlakiven · 29/01/2022 16:24

I’d be more worried about the consequences for the child if you DONT call the police than the consequences for your sister if you do call them.

Original poster
arghhhhwhattf · 29/01/2022 16:26

SS have previously been involved but don't think anything ever came from it? She always says she's a good mom as her daughter is fed, goes to school has what she wants etc which is true to an extent BUT she is listening to the shit, witnessing her having her crying episodes, drinking, leaving her in the house with her bf while she goes out. So it's neglectful I think isn't it ?
My mom is scared of her I think. Actually scared of what she'll do/say if she reports her. I think she needs sectioning or something

OP posts:
BitcherOfBlakiven · 29/01/2022 17:42

That’s the BASICS of parenting, for Gods sake.

I grew up with an alcoholic mother who insisted she was a good parent - reader, she was not.

Yes your sister will threaten all sorts, addicts are skilled manipulators. Whether she follows through on her threats or not is not your fault, but I’m sorry to say, what happens to that child is on all of your heads if you don’t report her

  • every time the child is left alone
  • every time she drink drives
  • every time she becomes violent
  • every time she starts screaming and shouting

Etc etc

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