Too scared to go to my uni classes

anxietysawful · 2022-01-27T10:23:27+00:00

I'm doing a degree, I love it but I cant hack face to face classes. I'm in one just now, I'm terrified - sweating, palpitations, shaking legs . It's only for two hours a week FFS but I spend my whole week dreading it . I get attacks where I feel like I'm going to collapse and I dont want that to happen here . cant focus on what's being said, can only thing about how soon I can leave.

Original poster

anxietysawful · 27/01/2022 10:24

Uni do know, but said this class is mandatory and as my f2f attendance is at 10% I'm in in danger of being kicked out if I dont go

OP posts:

SoupDragon · 27/01/2022 10:24

What is it that scares you about them?

Original poster

anxietysawful · 27/01/2022 10:26

@SoupDragon

What is it that scares you about them?

I'm scared of heights - I'm dyspraxia and end up off balance - and we're on the 8th floor, and I'm scared I'll suddenly end up seriously ill or something while I'm here. Its irrational I know but it doesn't stop once its started

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Blurp · 27/01/2022 10:29

Talk to your lecturer after the lecture, and explain what's going on. Or, if you need to take a breather afterwards, do it and then go to see the lecturer.

Is it actually necessary for you to be there or could you follow it on Zoom? If it's a practical class then obviously you'll need to work something out, but if it's not, it's probably just that the lecturer prefers getting everyone together (it makes teaching easier and more effective in many cases) - but it may be that you specifically don't need to be there.

There will be things they can do to help you, so go and talk to them; if that doesn't help, go to the head of department or another tutor.

This is really common, to be honest; they'll have dealt with it many times before.

Also see your doctor and see what options they can give you.

dreamingbohemian · 27/01/2022 10:31

Have you talked to the disabilities support office at your uni? They should be able to give you an adjustments plan that means you can't be kicked out for this. I've seen them at my uni.

SoupDragon · 27/01/2022 10:33

@dreamingbohemian

Have you talked to the disabilities support office at your uni? They should be able to give you an adjustments plan that means you can't be kicked out for this. I've seen them at my uni.

Yes, DS got support for anxiety (his was in the form of extra time/rest breaks/automatic extensions but I think they had other things to offer too.

He did have a diagnosis from his GP though - have you seen yours?

louderthan · 27/01/2022 10:33

Hi OP. I work in HE, my uni considers anxiety disorders and certainly dyspraxia to be disabilities and adjustments must be made accordingly. Are you registered with student support? Get onto them and the student union and they will help you. The attitude of 'it's mandatory and you'll fail if you don't attend', whilst not making any effort to support or work with you is not acceptable.

CapitanSandy · 27/01/2022 10:36

I feel for you. I was exactly like this when I was at uni and it was just horrible. Something about being in a lecture hall made me so anxious. I transferred to the Open university and got some CBT which was life changing.

Definitely talk to your tutor and see if you can attend online when you’re struggling.

In the mean time can you do something like a grounding technique 54321 eg look for five things you can see etc. It can sometimes help take the edge off.

Keep telling yourself it’s just adrenaline in your body and nothing bad is going to happen. You’ve got through this before so you can do it again

Original poster

anxietysawful · 27/01/2022 10:38

They're saying something about because it's an NHS accredited degree the royal college have set mandatory attendance levels, they won't allow me to do the class by zoom despite repeatedly asking, and explaining .

union/disability team know and said better in the long run to push myself to try for the two hours as if I didn't I'd be in the house 24/7.

I am absolutely terrified though, and sitting alone as usual, classmates are all yapping and friends and stuff and heres me in the corner alone .

OP posts:

Original poster

anxietysawful · 27/01/2022 10:47

I've got a mentor who phones once a week and I was saying to her I'm struggling to make friends with classmates, she said by not going to classes I'm making it impossible for anyone to be my friend which makes sense but easier said than done.

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Ohpulltheotherone · 27/01/2022 10:57

Are you having any therapy or taking medication for your anxiety OP?

If not then start by talking to your GP.

saraclara · 27/01/2022 10:58

You say that this is an NHS related course. What role in the NHS will it lead to? And how far along the degree are you?

It seems that you have an anxiety disorder that if not addressed, is going to be incompatible with working in the NHS. Most NHS jobs are face to face, and many involve working in hospitals with high floors

Are you getting help with the disorder itself? And are you making any progress?

ThanksIGotItInMorrisons · 27/01/2022 11:09

What a nightmare for you op. I think that the uni are trying (albeit in a terrible manner) to encourage you not to be at the mercy of your anxiety and fear. They are right - you can’t meet people and make friends if you don’t meet people, and you are at risk of completely cutting yourself off of you don’t make it to this one class - but you know this. Can you get counselling via your doctor instead of trying through the uni? There had been a period in my life where my anxiety and fears overtook me so much I became agoraphobic. I was a mess. It took me hours to pluck up the courage to leave my home, and when I opened the front door everything started swimming, I got dizzy, and felt like I was free falling. I got major palpitations and sweaty and started hyperventilating. I couldn’t make it past the doorstep.
I got counselling. I took it one day, literally one step at a time. It’s hard going. Don’t let yourself reach that stage. Whilst you can get outside and I enthusiastically get to class, use this to your advantage. You’ve got a stepping stone here to make your life better.
Take a look at online support - such as MIND. there are also online numbers you can text and get one to one counselling, free, right in the palm of your hand where and when you need it. Sending you hugs and well wishes. Feel free to PM me if you like.

amusedbush · 27/01/2022 11:21

Ah, the accreditation makes it tricky. I don't have experience of any related to the NHS but I managed the administrative side of business degrees for years and our accounting programmes were accredited by ACCA and CIMA. The course had certain mandatory elements set by those bodies, which made accommodations for students with additional requirements really difficult. I remember a heated discussion in a Board of Examiners meeting on this very topic because it disadvantaged certain students.

Is it just face to face attendance they are looking for or are you being scored on your participation? I now teach at the university and have had students "attend" virtually, as in I set up a laptop in the classroom and they participate in the on-campus tutorial via Zoom.

erinaceus · 27/01/2022 11:27

Crumbs, that sounds really difficult. Have you tried CBT for the specific problem? Sending .

Original poster

anxietysawful · 27/01/2022 12:47

Made it through the class and then had the most horrendous panic attack when I tried to leave the building . Horrible, horrible feeling . Thought I was going to pass out in the corridor . Ended up bolting into the union building next door, they were lovely and got me into a taxi . Never been in there before funnily enough .

RE placement/clinical, I manage that better because I’m up and moving and jumping between tasks quickly iyswim - this class is mainly sitting listening and the lecturer talking for two hours . I felt much better on placement tbh, most of the horrible anxiety wasn’t there - hiding behind a uniform maybe . Was the same when I worked full time, anxiety was non existent . It’s being in lectures for some reason, I go to pieces .

Fortunately the class isn’t on next week, so I’ve got a breather - my disability contact has also put me in touch with a classmate who’s been friendly before, and said that she and I can sit together and will walk to and from class together, which will help a lot . She couldn’t make it today or that would have happened today .

Still have to go to my GP surgery at half 3 for a blood test and the chemist as well but can hold the chemist off til Monday so that’s a bonus . It’s horrible feeling like this .

OP posts:

Original poster

anxietysawful · 27/01/2022 12:54

@amusedbush

Ah, the accreditation makes it tricky. I don't have experience of any related to the NHS but I managed the administrative side of business degrees for years and our accounting programmes were accredited by ACCA and CIMA. The course had certain mandatory elements set by those bodies, which made accommodations for students with additional requirements really difficult. I remember a heated discussion in a Board of Examiners meeting on this very topic because it disadvantaged certain students.

Is it just face to face attendance they are looking for or are you being scored on your participation? I now teach at the university and have had students "attend" virtually, as in I set up a laptop in the classroom and they participate in the on-campus tutorial via Zoom.

Thankfully just attendance - you can sit in silence if wanted, which is a bonus as when I did my first degree years ago there was an expectation that you talked (just an English lit degree, but you had to join in twice each class) !!

Funnily enough I did ask that if I could join in over zoom but I know what they mean, that hiding away as I am won’t help at all in the long run . I’m very lonely much of the time so I can see where it would help to be amongst other people and talking .

Yes it’s the same with my course, RCSLT have set requirements and I think one is that you go to 80% of each class - so I’ve been to three out of 12, lecturers said I pretty much have to go to the rest now or ineligible for assessment in that module .

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BuffaloHigh · 27/01/2022 13:06

Is there anything that would make it better? Eg can you get someone from student support (or whatever it’s called at your uni) to attend with you for a few weeks? Can you ask for a specific seat near a door to be reserved for you? Would anything like that help?

Blurp · 29/01/2022 22:18

Can you try to make friends in other ways? Are you a member of any clubs or societies in UBI? Or do you live in halls - maybe there are things there you could go to? On my first couple of years at uni the vast majority of my friends weren't from my course, they were from the clubs I joined and from my floor in halls.