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Potentially leaving job - terrified?

4 replies

AndItDoesntSeemToMatter · 18/01/2022 13:46

I've been in the same job for over 12 years and the one before that for 6 (only had these two long term roles, both admin related but fast paced and stressful, college before that). My first employer was a bully who treated me awfully but when I left because of it he asked me to return. I did and we got on much better after that. He was dismayed when I eventually left for good some time later for natural reasons and admitted he had a lot of respect for me and that he wished I wasn't leaving (he actually told me to name my price a year or so later but I was happy elsewhere). My current role is a lot higher / senior for a bigger company and not once in 12 years have I ever been dragged into a boardroom, bollocked or been in trouble. All my appraisals have been glowing, I am regularly told by all bosses (there are many) that I am brilliant at what I do. But I'm at that crossroad again for various reasons where I want to move on. A new, fresh environment. New people, new commute etc and I'm really hoping this will be my last "jump" to my forever job. I'm not hugely ambitious and I'm very happy with my salary, all I want is to be brave once more and settle in a new role I can be happy and cheerful in for the remainder of my working life. But... I'm terrified!! I'm not "brilliant" at all and I'm not fishing for compliments here I really am an awkward sod around people and I've been winging it all my life. What if I'm shit? What if the only reason I'm so good at this job is because it's been a third of my life? Change is definitely needed but it doesn't mean I'm not scared about it. I have images of having a panic attack at a new desk upon realising I haven't got a clue what I'm doing and being dragged into a disciplinary. A recruitment agent has just put me forward for a role on a salary only slightly higher than mine and all I can think of is "fucking hell I'm not worth that!" Is it normal to feel so intimated? I am imagining getting the sack and ending up with a paper round to try and pay my Netflix bill. Really bloody daunting!

OP posts:
MasonStreet · 18/01/2022 13:51

I say go for it.

You are displaying classic imposter syndrome traits. This typically affects women it seems (whole other thread)

I can be a bit like this myself. I try and ask the question “would a MAN be doubting himself like this?”

Not bloody likely

AndItDoesntSeemToMatter · 18/01/2022 14:26

Yeah I bet a man wouldn't be like this!

OP posts:
AndItDoesntSeemToMatter · 18/01/2022 17:43

Any other pearls of wisdom out there?!

OP posts:

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HappyStep1 · 18/01/2022 18:13

Google Amy Cuddy on You Tube, she gives a great Ted talk on Imposter Syndrome.
This really helped me when I had an interview for a job and I was feeling like you.
No only did I nail the interview, offered the job at the salary advertised and over a year in I am flying.
Try to have some faith in yourself Flowers

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