If you eloped, how did you announce it?

[Iwantacatnotcovid]

My partner and I both have autism and ADHD, and thus also some of the anxiety issues that go with those conditions.

We have been engaged for four years, but we haven't yet married as we both find the whole process/ situation overwhelming.

Because of this, we have agreed that elopement might be our best option. That way, the day will be just about us and what we want. We won't have to worry about seating plans, speeches, and so on.

Our problem is how then announce our wedding to friends and family?

Both my partner and I have kind, supportive, families and friends. We don't want to hurt anyone with our decision.

How about just a text to immediate family members/best friends of a photo of your hands wearing your wedding rings with 'meet the new Mr and Mrs .....' then once they have responded put it on whatever social media platforms you are on. Your family should understand how overwhelming it would be especially as they will have watched you grow up.

Sorry I just assumed Mr and Mrs if I got that wrong then please accept my apologies

@Iwantacatnotcovid

My partner and I both have autism and ADHD, and thus also some of the anxiety issues that go with those conditions.

We have been engaged for four years, but we haven't yet married as we both find the whole process/ situation overwhelming.

Because of this, we have agreed that elopement might be our best option. That way, the day will be just about us and what we want. We won't have to worry about seating plans, speeches, and so on.

Our problem is how then announce our wedding to friends and family?

Both my partner and I have kind, supportive, families and friends. We don't want to hurt anyone with our decision.

I just wanted to chip in and say that you can have your family there without fuss, it doesn’t have to be elopement or nothing.

Book a registry office and just have your parents there. Friends will understand. Maybe go out for dinner, maybe not.

You don’t have to have seating plans, flowers and a DJ blasting out the ABBA medley.

Tbh family will be hurt if you elope, they will get over it though if it’s what you decide to do.

By Whatsapp the morning of when it was too late for anyone else to arrive.

An acquaintance did it quite stylishly with engraved posted cards, which oddly made it seem more legitimate. It was a second marriage for both though.

We sent a picture of the sign for Gretna green and the two wedding rings and a message to the family WhatsApp group saying "guess what we're doing tomorrow". We were going to wait til afterwards but decided the excitement and messages would disrupt our first few hours of married life when we wanted to concentrate on each other.

We had a live update on here from our elopement as I had two two Mumsnetters there as witnesses.
Then we sent everyone a photo of our Just Married bunting before heading to Skye and a place with no mobile signal 😃

I received a lovely card in the post from my cousin. With a wedding snap on it.

We married a couple of days before Christmas. Told immediate family who we saw on Christmas Day, and then whatsapped friends with "Merry Christmas! Santa bought me a husband/wife" and a wedding photo. No complaints from anyone so even if they were pissed off they didn't tell us 😂

We text in the morning, we eloped 300 miles away from home, all planned in advance. We text to say that we were getting married and wanted to do it our way! My dm didn't take it great but everyone else was happy for us. We had the most amazing day

@Suprima

Well our families certainly weren’t hurt that we eloped. They love us and were so happy for us. We even had comments that if they had their time again, they would have done the same!

Thanks everyone - The photocard idea is a nice one.

We like the idea of telling people the night before too.

Yes I would love to be at my family and friends weddings and see THEIR big day, but it is theirs and if they want to do it as an elopement I'll be just as happy for them, particularly with how you feel about the whole process. You go get married.

We didn’t announce it at all. There are probably people who still don’t know we got married almost ten years ago!

Not eloped, but told no-one in advance. Just sent them a photo and an announcement in pretty hand-made (by me) card and a vair posh bit of chocolate. I had no idea at the time how long cutting out hundreds of cards and attaching little bits of ribbon would take; but that's another story.

Even my mother said, 'well, your (late) father said it might be simpler if you eloped'. No-one minded. She was like that . We still loved her.

I didn't quite elope. We told our families that we were going away to get married, just the two of us. I knew if I didn't tell my mum beforehand she would have been (quietly) upset to have been left out. I also know she's a gossip and half of my side of the family would have known anyway if she was the only person I told

Exciting! I'm assuming you have no children yourself, so just make a fun announcement that suits you.

My DC's dad eloped and married without telling them, picked them up from school and announced it by showing them his wedding ring. They were devastated, one saying 'we are just second best aren't we mummy'. One of my most heartbreaking moments for them.