Winning an argument

[whowhywhenwhat]

I like to discuss things to establish what is correct. However, people appear to just want to win an argument. I think what wins an argument is what is right. The discussion has been productive if this is established and if I have learnt something all the better, if the other person has learnt something all the better. What is extremely dissatisfying is when it comes to light the other person just wants to win a debate. What is right is never established. The discussion is just a power play.

How can this be avoided? How can I stop a discussion becoming an argument?

Some people do just want to win and it is hard to have a discussion with someone whose mind is made up.

I have a friend with whom I have great discussions. There are a couple of areas (well one mainly) where discussion is not possible as she is firmly in one camp and I am in another - we both know this isn't an area for discussion.

To stimulate a discussion in other areas, where we often have different views (but not polar opposite) both of us use the same technique

We start by asking questions about the others views
We make sure we understand why they hold those views
When we express our own views we do it from a point of humility, confirming it is an opinion based on limited information - no matter how much you know, your info is always limited.
Accepting that people have different views based on their own experience.
Accepting that, in most instances, it isn't a case on one person being right and the other being wrong. 'Correct' in many cases is dependent on experience, circumstance and perspective.

Some good points there @NannyGythaOgg, thanks. I agree with what you said about 'correct'. So much is contextual. I think what I meant what was correct given a particular context. But yes, thinking more deeply about this, this too will be framed by individual past experiences.

Maybe I am expecting too much from discussion. Although, I think we can increase our experience by learning from others.

Some people.just love an argument and can't ever be wrong . X annoying

Interesting!

Choosing the right argument is the half of success. Of course humility is important too since only fair debate can be considered the true debate. I have read here samplius.com/free-essay-examples/humility/ more information for preparation of the paper. Once we express the vision through the real us, it becomes easier to win.