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Original poster

Working from home with a toddle? Is it possible?

56 replies

mamamel2020 · 13/01/2022 13:54

Hey looking for some advice on working from home and a toddler😩

I’ve always worked full time since I left school and had to cut down my hours when pregnant as I was ill. I went back when he was 7 months due to the way my maternity worked out, Now my boys 18months and I’m still part time, Ive been struggling a lot not working full time as I’ve always done it and need to keep the routine as it messes with my mental health and I’m not bringing in anywhere near as much money as I used to and it’s really getting me down.

So I’ve been offered a full time job, 5 days over 7 on shift patterns. 2 of the shift patterns suit perfect but one is a 7am start and nursery doesn’t open till 8.

It’s a help desk role where I will be receiving and making calls and I’m just wondering if anyone does anything similar without using childcare or limited in the way of childcare?

Any help of advice is greatly appreciated!!❤️❤️

OP posts:
user1471523870 · 13/01/2022 14:53

I have a toddler, a demanding full time job and I do it from home. Having him at home and trying to work is nearly impossible, in particular if I have to make phone or video calls. I can barely look at emails and be reactive if there is anything urgent.
He would constantly call me to play, get snacks, play again, get water, comment on any tv program that is on etc. The best case scenario he would sit on my lap watching youtube on my mobile but complaining I am moving my arms to type on the computer.

This said, perhaps your little one behaves differently or sleeps until 8am or is happy to watch some tv with a bowl of cereals, or maybe you don't get phone calls until later in the day and you can manage the first hour with him around? Whatever the case it seems quite stressful to be honest...

KirstenBlest · 13/01/2022 15:07

No. You can't give a job your full attention and look after your child.

3mealsaday · 13/01/2022 15:09

Can you get partner's dad to come over at 7am and give your DC breakfast before he takes him to nursery at 8am? I know it's early, but you could offer to pay something and he's coming anyway.

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BendingSpoons · 13/01/2022 15:11

If your FIL is coming at 7.45ish for the nursery run, then managing 45 mins with the TV might be fine. Mine would be OK with this once or twice a week.

DisappointingCaramel · 13/01/2022 15:14

Omg people Rtft! It's for one hour.

Hugasauras · 13/01/2022 15:21

It's for one hour maybe multiple times a week, depending on shift pattern, surely? It doesn't say anywhere it's just one hour per week, just that one of the shift patterns that OP will work has that start time.

Hugasauras · 13/01/2022 15:25

And I think it's absolutely doable if your entire job isn't a help desk job that is about making and receiving phone calls. Phone calls and toddlers are not compatible. You might get lucky, or you might have an entire call with a toddler screeching or chatting or singing in the background. That's the problem. Some people won't mind it and will empathise; someone else might complain.

Sparklingbrook · 13/01/2022 15:29

I had to ring a large utility company this week, and I could barely hear the call handler. I could hear the TV blaring away and I could clearly hear small children being loud. I did comment that there was a lot of background noise so was struggling to hear and the call handler apologised and said they were WFH. The noise stopped momentarily then it sounded as if they were clonking about in the kitchen.

I rang another company at the start of the pandemic and the call handler said 'don't worry if you hear my dogs barking I'm WFH' and sure enough we had barking dogs,

It's just comes across as really unprofessional, and i would not be able to concentrate, but only you know whether you can do this and whether you can expect your toddler to be silent for an hour.

RoseSays · 13/01/2022 15:42

Only for 1 hour at week ? Then it's not ideal but possible.

Is there any chance you can do any of the following...

  1. Ask work to start at 8am instead that one day a week
  2. Ask dp dad to come at 7am and occupy the child before taking to nursery
  3. Pay a childminder/local teenage to occupy the child between 6.45 and 7.45?
Longingforsunshine · 13/01/2022 15:50

I say no. My DD would hear me on the phone and get full on FOMO and want to be part of the conversation. It would be far too stressful as a regular thing

Yellowdott · 13/01/2022 15:56

How did people commenting on here survive the pandemic? And all the self-isolating?

I can't understand how you all have such demanding toddlers that you can't imagine someone working for 1hr while having one at home. Maybe I'm extremely lucky with my girl but she easily stays in her room playing with her toys for 1hr and she's 2. And happily watches TV for 2-3 hours, though only let her do that when there's no other option.

I'd give it a go, OP. Let your employer know your situation beforehand - they might be understanding if you have the odd occasion you're away from your desk for a few mins. Plus, your child needs to learn some independence and to be able to entertain himself without your input for one hour. It's not a long time and it'll only get easier as he gets older.

DisappointingCaramel · 13/01/2022 16:00

Personally I'd press if there is an option to start later and finish later after dc are in school.

Katela18 · 13/01/2022 16:01

I think only you can know this as it depends on the type of work you are doing and also your toddler.

I do this, I start work at 8 but toddler doesn't start nursery until 9. However, I drive my own calendar and don't really work in a role where I'm receiving calls. I essentially direct my own workload.

It probably depends on whether you feel you can provide a professional environment for any calls you might receive while the toddler is at home with you.

DisforDarkChocolate · 13/01/2022 16:03

I think you need to find someone who wants adhoc work. Do you have a nursery worker or someone doing childcare at college you could ask?

Hugasauras · 13/01/2022 16:03

It's not about entertaining themselves though. It's about doing so in total silence. I don't know many toddlers who will sit for an hour without speaking, but maybe DD is just a chatterbox! She can happily entertain herself for ages but I don't expect her to be totally silent while she does so. She chats to herself, talks about stuff that's on TV, shows me things occasionally, sings and acts out stuff with her toys doing voices. None of which is an issue if I was just doing emails or on the computer, but I'm not sure if some people are missing that the job is making and receiving phone calls Confused

Sparklingbrook · 13/01/2022 16:07

I did find when I had toddlers of my own that the minute i was on the phone they wanted my attention!

mynameiscalypso · 13/01/2022 17:18

@Yellowdott

How did people commenting on here survive the pandemic? And all the self-isolating?

I can't understand how you all have such demanding toddlers that you can't imagine someone working for 1hr while having one at home. Maybe I'm extremely lucky with my girl but she easily stays in her room playing with her toys for 1hr and she's 2. And happily watches TV for 2-3 hours, though only let her do that when there's no other option.

I'd give it a go, OP. Let your employer know your situation beforehand - they might be understanding if you have the odd occasion you're away from your desk for a few mins. Plus, your child needs to learn some independence and to be able to entertain himself without your input for one hour. It's not a long time and it'll only get easier as he gets older.

Working with a toddler is just about okay if I'm just on my laptop etc (albeit I don't do it because I'm not paid to do childcare). But OP makes and receives calls. What happens when the toddler does a poo? Or wants a snack? Or climbs on a piece of furniture?
LadySybilRamekin · 13/01/2022 20:00

Your partner is the obvious solution here - can they not see if they can get a slightly flexible start to cover the hour you need?

mermaidgiraffe · 13/01/2022 20:40

Depends on your toddler, my eldest would've happily sat and been glued to peppa pig for an hour. My youngest would not.

TheFairPrincess · 13/01/2022 20:46

It's doable just make sure you are very prepared, no eating out of site of you, everything secure and childproof etc..

I work from home and I don't do sole childcare but I have looked after my toddler on an ad hoc basis if my DP who cares for them needs to pop out quickly or something. Preparation and a consistent routine is key - i.e. when smallest DC was a little younger DP could usually leave him at home with me for the PM school run as he had a consistent nap routine.

TheFairPrincess · 13/01/2022 20:49

Working with a toddler is just about okay if I'm just on my laptop etc (albeit I don't do it because I'm not paid to do childcare). But OP makes and receives calls. What happens when the toddler does a poo? Or wants a snack? Or climbs on a piece of furniture?

This is a really good point to be honest. I'm lucky in that for my work calls are relatively infrequent and usually either flexible or predictable. An hour is actually a long time to be also caring for a toddler if you have to make phonecalls that whole time. I was thinking more getting on with work/emails but OP I speak from experience it is very likely that at the very least people will regularly hear your noisy toddler in the background.

BernadetteRostankowskiWolowitz · 13/01/2022 20:51

What time does your partner leave the house in the morning?

purpledagger · 13/01/2022 21:00

I think that type of role would be difficult with a toddler.

If your child was older eg school age. Or, if the role didn't involve answering phones, you could cope for an hour, but I think both factors make it really difficult.

Slayduggee · 13/01/2022 21:02

I was first of all going to say wfh with a toddler is insanity. I’ve got 19 month old who needs constant attention as he’s constantly up to mischief. I think 45 mins/1 hour is doable. With they play in their cot or a play pen for an hour so you can watch them and take call. It will probably been the most stressful hour of the week but needs must!

AppleTangerine · 13/01/2022 21:18

I think if it was a job that involved emails and you could catch up later it might be doable for an hour (dependent on toddler's temperament) but it wouldn't work for a job you have to take calls. Can you negotiate your hours slightly?