Active discussions

Meet the Other Phone. Only the apps you allow.

Meet the Other Phone.
Only the apps you allow.

Buy now

Please or to access all these features

Talk
Chat

Join the discussion and chat with other Mumsnetters about everyday life, relationships and parenting.

Original poster

Family - sneaky sister

39 replies

Silia · 10/01/2022 23:34

Not sure if I am unreasonable.
I have just found out my sister bought a house and knew nothing of it.
2 months ago I purchased my first house which needed work and I have builders presently there working. I received a phone call from my builder informing me that he has a meeting with my sister from some work she has for him. Since the meeting was taking place I my house where builders are I decided to go there. I was surprised to hear my sister talking about work she needs doing at her new house. I had no idea she bought a second house. I feel like if my builder did not call me I would have never known. I had no idea she took my builder's number last time she came to visit the work been done. Is it okay to feel annoyed about her behaviour? Should I confront her?

OP posts:
Havilland · 11/01/2022 00:36

She would’ve known that your builder may have mentioned it in passing that your sister came round and he’s going to be doing some work on her house as well as yours and may even thank you for the recommendation.

Therefore it seems odd that she hasn’t mentioned it directly to you unless she believed that you would be critical about it.

madisonbridges · 11/01/2022 00:42

I had thought it strange you sister didn't tell you. But now I'm thinking your behaviour might be responsible for that. If my builder rang to say my sister was going to see him and I was curious, I'd contact her and ask her why. I wouldn't be going round to my house, practically hiding, so I could spy in what was being said. It's your house but that doesn't give you a pass to act so weirdly. I'd say you're sneaker than your sister.

PurpleMauve · 11/01/2022 00:42

Just ask her.
It sounds like you’re scared she will also cut you off if you ask ask her.
What’s the backstory regarding her previous behaviour that your siblings thought was unreasonable enough to question?

Interested in this thread?

Then you might like threads about this subject:

Families
Original poster
Silia · 11/01/2022 00:50

We are 4 siblings last is almost 30. And I have just turned 31.
My sister is never wrong and when My little sister and brother told her how rude she can sometimes be she did not take it well

OP posts:
Original poster
Silia · 11/01/2022 00:55

Look I don't believe I was hiding I was upstairs with the other builder since there are 3 of them. and he was showing me how far the work is going and the progress in the 3rd bedroom, he and the fact that the ceiling in the hall way needed replacing. Hence when I came to see the damage to the ceiling in the hallway downstairs that is when I heard them. That is not sneaky

OP posts:
Teenagehorrorbag · 11/01/2022 00:56

You both sound odd! She is for not mentioning it when you speak every day, and you are for not just asking her. Did she know you were in the house when she was talking to your builder?

My siblings and I are lucky enough to have bought rental / holiday homes over the years and although we don't live close to each other, or speak daily, we are all close and have no secrets on big items like that. I would think it rather strange in your situation. Might she have thought she'd mentioned it to you and forgotten to?

Original poster
Silia · 11/01/2022 00:57

Thanking all for your advises and taking the time to reply. I really appreciate it and just wanted to let it out of my system and decided to post here.

OP posts:
Original poster
Silia · 11/01/2022 01:02

I was just chocked and out of words and will ask her

OP posts:
DustyGrapevine · 11/01/2022 01:27

I bought a house last year and didn't tell my so-called best friend or sister. I did this out of stubbornness, because I realised they talked about themselves non stop but never asked me anything about myself. I decided to no longer volunteer any information, but that I'd tell them if at any point they asked about me. They didn't! I got through the whole process, including moving, before either of them stopped talking about themselves long enough, but even then they were told by other people. Childish on my part? Probably.

So do you ask your sister what she's up to or has it all been about your house renovations?

madisonbridges · 11/01/2022 01:27

@Silia

Look I don't believe I was hiding I was upstairs with the other builder since there are 3 of them. and he was showing me how far the work is going and the progress in the 3rd bedroom, he and the fact that the ceiling in the hall way needed replacing. Hence when I came to see the damage to the ceiling in the hallway downstairs that is when I heard them. That is not sneaky
Yeah...no. You previously said... I did not accidentally go there. I went there on purpose because it is my house and I have every right to. If anyone is having a meeting at your house regardless of who it is would you not go there? I was curious as to why she will go to my house when iam not around at 8.30 pm to speak with my builders

You didn't go to see the builder at half eight at night. You went to see what your sister wanted to talk to him about. And when she arrived, you didn't make yourself known. And you didn't speak to her before she left. Listen, I think its odd she didn't tell you she'd bought a house, but let's not pretend that you called round for an update on the renovations when you've stated that you purposefully went to see what the meeting was about.

CharSiu · 11/01/2022 01:35

If anyone reveals they are buying a second home it shows they have a very decent income or assets. Personally I never tell my relatives or friends anything that may reveal my true financial status which is far better off than I appear.

DiddyHeck · 11/01/2022 01:48

@Silia

I am yet to ask her
Well you best crack on then. Not sure why you think Mumsnet is a better option?
LovePoppy · 11/01/2022 15:58

Based on your hiding and trying to spy on her meeting….I’m not sure your sister is the sneaky one

gsaoej · 11/01/2022 16:16

If my sibling didn’t tell me they bought a house, I would think it was weird.

New posts on this thread. Refresh page