Do your teenagers like you?

[Matbest]

If so, what are you doing right?!
I am a few years off teen years but I have been in a few conversations this week about teen children not wanting to be around their parents. Is this what I have to look forward to, or do teenagers get on with their parents really, for the most part?

DS is 16. I think he likes me! Sometimes it seems that he just tolerates me because obviously I'm his irritating Mum . He was an absolute nightmare between 14 -16, got involved in all sorts of trouble and almost destroyed DP and me. At almost 17 he's settled down completely. I know he appreciates our tenacity in not giving up on him and telling him we love him no matter what .

Yes mine like me, I learnt from the way I was treated growing up to keep talking to them, do things with them, keep the connection.
My own parents didn't do that with me and I was determined to break the chain.
You sound switched on OP so you will be fine.

We plan stuff to do together, we talk alot.
I make them come out on walks with me sometimes even if they moan a bit at the start they are absolutely fine once they are out and generally have a good time.
Taking them out places to eat together too.
There's always something you can do with them.
We sit together for dinner everyday and I ask about their day, I always show them I care.
Teens need alot more attention than people think they do.

She likes me but she doesn't want to spend much time with me. I try not to take it too personally!

Mine does when he wants cash/a lift/pizza delivery. I’m his bestie then, the rest of time I’m a sheer embarrassment. I remember feeling exactly the same at his age

@Matbest

So much good advice on here, thank you. You have given me hope. My teen years weren't very pleasant and my parents were very mentally unwell and quite absent during that time - I gave up and left home at 16. So it's hard to really imagine a positive environment, as I haven't really had even a healthy one modelled. But my sister has always had a really positive relationship with her (now adult) sons and I am determined to break the chain too.

Oh my goodness OP. I can't even begin to imagine all you've been through. But you should be so proud of yourself for your mindset and attitudes. You sound a wonderful and deeply caring parent xxx

I have an 18 yr old and 14 yr old-ao far so good.
We get on well, Im quite strict but we do have fun and talk about everything.
2 younger children to go still , might be completely different.

Yep, they like me and their friends like me. Which is nice! I'm quite an easy going parent and I've got easy going kids. And the older they get the more fun they are, we have a good laugh together and we can discuss more, I value their opinions and they seem to value mine too. So far so good! And hopefully when younger DC hit teens we'll have the same dynamic as I do with the older ones!

Most of the time. DD told me she's glad she's got me as her mom and not some of her friends moms for a mom. And then she'll just talk to me with complete distain. So I guess it just depends on which way the hormones take her on a particular day.

I think so. My dd tells me I am the funniest person she knows and my ds still gives me big man hugs and laughs at all my moaning and snarky comments . We go out a lot together and plan holidays together and they seem to enjoy being with me

Yeah they love me. Like, adore me.

I love them too. I have a lot of time for them. Their perspective is fantastic (at times ...).

What am I doing right? I’m not sure. I’m very honest with them. I don’t hold back on my political views or if other peoples bad behaviour. . I’m a single parent and I think that helps because my love and focus is on them and not shared with another adult. I’m honest about my problems and why I might be stressed without burdening them and I always apologise if I snap or get something wrong in my dealings with them. Never done “punishments” either. I’ve never really needed to.