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Original poster

Double barrelling without hyphen?

53 replies

ginandgarlands · 02/01/2022 20:59

Less of an AIBU but more of a question I guess…

I’m getting married this year and I think I want to take my husband’s surname in part, but I definitely want to keep mine in some capacity too.

Not keen on double barrelling with a hyphen when he is not going to do this, but would quite like to add his name as a second surname. So for example I would become Sarah Smith Jones (not my real name, obviously).

I know this is legal but I’m just wondering if anyone has done this and had any issues, or if I’m missing something by wanting to do it this way?

OP posts:
Nc123 · 02/01/2022 22:24

I did this. You do get people who are confused by it, but not that many. I like it and have never regretted doing it.

Aspidistra1 · 02/01/2022 22:24

Depends how much of a brand you are! Victoria Coren Mitchell and Courteney Cox Arquette were the first examples to spring to mind.

Kite22 · 02/01/2022 22:25

It does cause no end of issues on databases when people assume the first surname is a second first name IYSWIM. I often have to look for people on a huge database which admittedly has a shockingly bad search facility and it really does confuse.

Cosmois · 02/01/2022 22:31

I do this and everyone manages to get it right. I am Dr Maiden Name Husband's Surname. No one ever gets it wrong when I use both names although I drop my husband's surname for work as I publish in just my maiden name (academic) and sometimes drop my maiden name for family stuff when easier to all just have one surname (e.g. school stuff).

Kite22 · 02/01/2022 22:50

Of course, as a pp said, it is MUCH more complicated if the surname you put in the middle can also be a first name (Taylor, etc)

CointreauVersial · 02/01/2022 22:52

This is exactly how the Americans do it.

PennyDiamond · 02/01/2022 23:00

I did it and with hindsight I would have just kept my maiden name! Kids have his surname.
Mine is long though, think Annie Johnson Adams.
I use the whole thing for official stuff, but casually use either depending on where I am.
When I want to be clear I write the surnames all in caps which helps avoid middle name confusion.

Cupcakeschocolate · 02/01/2022 23:04

Oldest sons first name is double barrelled hyphenated. I did this so it wouldn't look like he had to middle names

FestiveFuckery · 02/01/2022 23:12

I have this name and so does my DD. My understanding is it's very old fashioned and predates the hyphen. Mothers name goes first. I have a surname that's extremely rare so my mum kept it and I have both parents. DD has mine and Her dads. So for example, DM is Festive and DF was Fuckery. I'm Emma Festive Fuckery and DD is Gemma Festive Banana. Not real names.

No issues apart from people adding a hyphen where it's not supposed to be and some people picking the last one but again, my understanding is that's the correct thing. The first one is more formal. We both tend to use one in daily life as it's such a bloody mouthful.

Willyoujustbequiet · 02/01/2022 23:16

Yes for dc and had no problems whatsoever. I'm really surprised some posters encountered issues.

Also, they have now dropped the last name and kept first one (mine) - schools, banks etc..all followed again with no issues. Go for it.

FestiveFuckery · 02/01/2022 23:16

To be clear, only one or two have ever added the hyphen and it's been easily understood once I've said "no hyphen"

RandomMess · 02/01/2022 23:29

I have this I just state my surname is "smith jones no hyphen".

On the phone to the Drs when they ask for my name I will say "my surname is smith Jones no hyphen"

Day to day I tend to use just the last surname especially when it's about the DC.

Seb342 · 02/01/2022 23:34

I've got a double barrelled surnames (thanks to my father's side of the family) and sometimes I use a hyphen sometimes I don't. When I was younger I'd drop one of the names altogether or be lazy and just use initials like Sarah S-J. It's honestly been the bane of my life, causes problems when some companies use the last name some the first for your records, your surname never fits in the spaces on application forms or any sort of paperwork, learning to write your full name in school isn't easy, I could go on and on.

Haffdonga · 02/01/2022 23:36

@ginandgarlands
I did this. It's been fine. I choose to 'drop' the first of my two surnames in most daily/ work type situations so I'm known to most as Haff Jones . I use my full name Haffdonga Smith Jones on passport, bank, academic certificates etc.

There are minor irritations:

  • It can cause a few extra seconds finding my prescription at the pharmacy because sometimes it's filed under S and sometimes J.
  • Some customer services departments (but not official government ones) seem to be unable to cope without the hyphen so the computer won't recognise me without checking extra id (that seems to be happening less these day though)

Both our dc have the same 2 name surname and don't seem to have had any issues. They've both chosen to go as DS Jones and keep the extra name for officialdom. They do both grumble that their names are too long though!

So the issues that crop up aren't very problematic and overall I'm pleased we've got the flexibility to use one, other or both names.

Good luck!

Seb342 · 02/01/2022 23:36

@MythicalBiologicalFennel

Forgot to say that it's annoying that companies and individuals take it upon themselves to "correct" you... as if I don't know my own surname Hmm but they will get it wrong and override you OP despite your best attempts.

I'm looking at you Boden and Waitrose, I entered my name in the name box and my surname in the surname box

Yes I second this! When it tells you your surname is invalid and can't have spaces I usually drop one of the names.
MazzleDazzle · 02/01/2022 23:42

I did this!

It works perfectly well for me. I use my maiden name at work & married name for family life. Didn’t want a hyphen as IMO it sounds a bit pretentious. Don’t mind being called either surname, so I don’t correct anyone. Never been any confusion.

DoryisinCuba · 02/01/2022 23:45

@Thoosa

What does getting an “observation” on your passport mean?

If you look above/below the photo page (depending on how old the passport is) there is a blank page headed “This page is reserved for official observations”. On mine it has been printed on that page “THE HOLDER IS ALSO KNOWN AS OLIVIA JANE MICHAELS” (Not real name obviously.)

The passport helpline were very helpful on telling me how to do it.

That is really interesting @Thoosa. I have a double barrelled married name I have had for 20 years. I now want to use my maiden name for a certain branch of my work for security purposes. I wonder if I could do this?
Davros · 02/01/2022 23:57

My middle name IS a surname, my grandmother's maiden name. I get fed up with how many times it's assumed to be my surname, when I'm called at Dr's for instance.

thepeopleversuswork · 03/01/2022 00:03

My DD is double barrelled without the hyphen. It does cause the odd mix-up but I don't think the hyphen would make that much difference tbh. The two surnames that make up the name are so different that hyphenating them would have looked daft.

RoyKentsChestHair · 03/01/2022 00:16

We both double barrelled with no hyphen when we married and same for the DCs.

Places it’s most annoying:

Collecting my prescription - sometimes its under one initial (my surname) and other times it’s under the other surname, so always the last place they look!

On bank cards: can’t cope apparently do they either squish both names together as one long name Confused or put a hyphen in

My kids school: they have one of them on record with a hyphen and one without. When I try and book parents evening etc the username they have on record also sometimes has a hyphen so I can’t log in until I work out what’s wrong! Have asked them to change it but clearly they have it in lots of different places!

Anyone phoning me always asked for mrs (his name) - the second surname. And they always mispronounce it too Angry

Otherwise, it’s fine Grin. TBH I’m thinking of changing it back now we’re divorced. My DCs often just use one name or the other too.

Magnited · 03/01/2022 00:37

I always understood that the hyphen was traditionally used by the landed gentry on marriage. If two landed estates were effectively combined then it became Farquhar-Smyth (eg) so the name was not extinguished from the land. Otherwise the hyphen was not used because it was not necessary.

Thoosa · 03/01/2022 01:00

That is really interesting @Thoosa. I have a double barrelled married name I have had for 20 years. I now want to use my maiden name for a certain branch of my work for security purposes. I wonder if I could do this?

Absolutely @DoryisinCuba - all they need is your marriage certificate and a covering letter (and of course the passport renewal and fee.) They return the marriage certificate and letter with the cancelled previous passport. Ring them. They’re always helpful.

If you go the slow route using a paper form I think there’s even a section to make additional requests.

Thoosa · 03/01/2022 01:13

@Aspidistra1

Depends how much of a brand you are! Victoria Coren Mitchell and Courteney Cox Arquette were the first examples to spring to mind.
Ha! That’s where we are all going wrong. Not famous enough. I will tell the DC that would have been the answer. Grin
Gardeniafleur · 03/01/2022 01:21

I have known lots of Irish married women do this, but not sure if that’s common or if I just happen to randomly have met lots who do this!

All Spanish / many Latin American countries have names in this format.

Hesma · 03/01/2022 06:24

My mum did this and I grew up with this, not an issue