A desk plant I can’t kill!

[MrsBooks]

As of Tuesday I will have my very own desk at work! For 10 years I have WFH or only been P/T or job share so never had my own desk, and am childishly excited about this! I get to leave my mug / notebook etc out, can put a photo next to my monitor, and I’d really like a plant!

Every single plant I’ve ever tried to nurture, I have killed- veg patch, spider plants, even a cactus.

My office is quite bright but I can find a shady spot if necessary. I can get to a B&Q or garden centre tomorrow. Please recommend me something that won’t grow huge and also tell me how to look after it! Thank you

Snake plant or a pothos/philodendron.

Mother in law's tongue - sorry I don't know it's real name, I'm sure Google does!

Snake plant

Money plant. Literally indestructible.

www.patchplants.com/gb/en/w/product-type/plants/environment/indoor/care-level/un-killable/
Some ideas here.

Lithops? Living stones. They're meant to be pretty hard to destroy. I find that spider plants are quite hardy, as well.

Snake plant. I managed to keep one alive even though I can kill most plants with a glance. I also managed it in an office with no windows. They're literally indestructible. Mine had a baby, I named it Timmy.

Air plants

@MONSTERSALAD

Lithops? Living stones. They're meant to be pretty hard to destroy. I find that spider plants are quite hardy, as well.

I killed one of them.

I foolishly watered it, sparingly, before a 2 week holiday. Came back to a mouldy lump... It felt personal, if I'm honest.

Wow, thank you all!!

Snake plant / mother in laws tongue it is!!

Kalanchoe

You can buy them literally everywhere and they are very easy to look after. The thick waxy leaves mean they'll like a sunny windowsill. Water it about every ten days - stick in a few cms of tepid (not cold) water and let it have a good drink. Most people over water houseplants!

www.gardenersworld.com/how-to/grow-plants/how-to-grow-kalanchoe/

Or you could get some Marino Moss Pets/Balls.

They’re cute. I have five…

As a committed plant killer, I've found not trying to nurture them works well with spider plants and cacti.

I can hardly believe I'm saying this but...there are some very realistic artificial ones these days. M&S and Sainsbury's for eg have them.

I'm a keen gardener and have no problem with most plants but I hate to see half dead ones or worse. If you ever hear someone tutting loudly next to the unwatered, dying supermarket plants it'll be me!

But if it has to be real then as mentioned already,Money Plant - crassula ovata - is pretty indestructible as long as you very occasionally water it. If it survives you may eventually have to get a bigger pot and some compost.

A terrarium I think its called, used to be a bottle garden. You don't need to do anything to it at all.

Peace lily. Ignore it and water only when it’s leaves droop. They thrive on neglect.

Zz plants are really good at being ignored too.

Yep Peace Lilies are really easy as PP said..easily available and just completely ignore them..their leaves visibly droop when they need a bit of a water, that then perks them up for a few weeks! Really easy! They prefer not to be in direct sun though..mine are on shelves /mantelpiece.

They are great for improving air quality too

How about a nice cactus?

I had a fake one from Ikea that looked so realistic that well-meaning colleagues watered it when I was on holiday.

Peace Lilies are amazing. You just water when the leaves look a bit droopy and they bounce right back. I have lots in my house that I’ve had for years! Asda sell them for around £4 if you want to try one.

I have a drachaena that started out living on my desk about 15 years ago. Brought it home when I changed jobs and it’s still clinging on.

@ViceLikeBlip

Money plant. Literally indestructible.

All my leaves fell off 😔

Bought a snake plant!! Ended up with 2 ceramic pots as the first one was too small so if this one stays alive until Easter I’ll get a peace lily for the smaller pot !!

Seriously, not only are spider plants pretty unkillable but they are prolific producers of charming babies that are really sweet and make you look like you have green fingers. And even better, if you ask anyone they will have about 15 available to give you for free (go on, ask me!)