What can I do about 3.5 yo DD?

[Wherehasitgone]

DD has always been a poor sleeper. Stopped napping completely at 18months, but was still breastfeeding in the night 2-3 times up until just after she turned 3 when I fell pregnant and weaned her off the breast. I’m now almost 7 months pregnant and she does not sleep. She attends a school nursery full time and is currently off for the Christmas holidays but tbh it’s the same even when she’s at nursery! She will not go to sleep until 9/10pm and even later if she’s allowed to. I’ve started putting her in bed at 6:30 and reading a couple of stories so lights out around 7ish, she wakes up an hour or two later and is wide awake until after midnight. She doesn’t have anything sugary past 4pm so it can’t be that. No idea what to do! She wakes up around 8, sometimes earlier even. We go to the playground/exercise/stimulate, still nothing works. My friends son the same age still has a 2 hour nap in the day plus is conked out by 6:30 and sleeps all the way through!! Where am I going wrong 🥲

You’re not doing anything wrong, she just needs less sleep than your friend’s DS.

My 8yo was sleeping 7-5 at that age. He’s now shifted to 8.15-6ish.

All kids are different… your friend’s child has a lot of sleep.
My 2 older children slept a solid 7-7 at that age (no nap).
My now nearly 3 year old doesn’t settle until 8.30-9ish then gets up at 6. No nap. He just needs less sleep.

Sounds very similar to my DD. It's just how she is. She is in P1 now and sleeps a bit better.

My 3.5 years old DD sleeps normally 7.45pm-6/6.30am no naps

Your friends child sleeps loads!

Is she full enough?. Is she warm enough?
Can she keep /pull her covers on?
Do you give her too much 'fuss' when you go in to resettle her?

My son slept 730-7 at that age. No naps. If your dd is waking it's like it's a nap. You could try putting her down a bit later? Start bed time at around 7 with a view to lights out at 8? What's happening when she wakes? I'd aim for minimal attention, leading back to bed. No lights noise etc.

We cut out screens and dimmed the lights for an hour or so before bed,and play very calmly with jigsaws or read stories, nothing too stimulating but all focus on her. Then up to bed and in a silent/dark room. My DD essentially needs to be bored to sleep!