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A child being bilingual

101 replies

lightand · 30/12/2021 10:22

Hello

One of my grandchildren will grow up being biligual. He is currently 7 months old.

I dont know what to expect. Can people give me some pointers please? fwiw, the language other then English, will not be a European one.

OP posts:
Simonjt · 30/12/2021 10:24

What sort of pointers are you after?

My son is trilingual, my daughter will be multilingual (I don’t think there is a word for four languages).

lightand · 30/12/2021 10:25

For instance, I dont think he is currently very "chatty".

Over christmas, he had people from both nationalities in the same room[which wont happen that often]. If I was a young child, I would be confused by two languages at the same time, as well!

OP posts:
Iflyaway · 30/12/2021 10:26

My son is bilingual, as I am.

Just growing up like that will do it. One's a Euro language.

Interested in this thread?

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LIZS · 30/12/2021 10:26

Usually each parent uses their own language. It can mean that a child speaks later but understands more. 7 mo aren't often "chatty".

lightand · 30/12/2021 10:26

pointers such as

do they choose one language over another?
do they speak later, and with fewer words initially?
I presume young children mix the languages together frequently?

as you can see, I am clueless

OP posts:
Simonjt · 30/12/2021 10:27

@lightand

For instance, I dont think he is currently very "chatty".

Over christmas, he had people from both nationalities in the same room[which wont happen that often]. If I was a young child, I would be confused by two languages at the same time, as well!

He’s seven months old, of course he isn’t chatty, lots of babies aren’t particularly vocal.

A baby hearing two languages isn’t confusing, children learning language learn it through hearing it and being exposed to it, not confusing about that.

lightand · 30/12/2021 10:29

and what about books?
have books in both languages? though I dont think there are that many baby books in the other country. But I dont know that for 100%. I do know that toys there are in short supply and poor quality.

OP posts:
ChildrenGrowingUpTooFast · 30/12/2021 10:29

Do both parents speak the other language? If not, are there any other speakers of the other language who will spend regular and significant amount of time with the child? If the child isn’t on an environment that speaks the minority language regularly, my experience is that the child won’t speak the other language. Especially once they start nursery or preschool.

They will speak English fluently. If you are not the speaker of the minority language, you should speak English to the child. (One parent one language). But maybe learn a few words of the other language as the child might use it in English sentences. My first child speaks slightly later and can say words of the other language initially. (Lost it all once she was in nursery for 3-6 months). My second didn’t speak a word of it.

Simonjt · 30/12/2021 10:30

@lightand

pointers such as

do they choose one language over another?
do they speak later, and with fewer words initially?
I presume young children mix the languages together frequently?

as you can see, I am clueless

Depends on the set up of each family.

My son used to use Urdu as his main language as thats what we speak at home, now my husband lives here he uses English a bit more as my husbands Urdu isn’t great.
My son spoke later, this is due to him having a hearing impairment and suffering neglect.
Some mix languages, it depends on the languages and whether the flow works, he often speaks a combination of Urdu and English (as do I) if one language has a better way of expressing something.

IDontDrinkTea · 30/12/2021 10:31

My DD is bilingual.

She generally speaks English better though as that’s what she’s exposed to most with nursery etc

When she was very little she would mix the languages, because she only knew the word she needed in one of the languages, or it was considerably easier to pronounce in one language. It wasn’t a phase that lasts long though

ChildrenGrowingUpTooFast · 30/12/2021 10:31

My experience is of a non European language. I grew up overseas but with both parents speaking it. Most overseas born children can’t read or write it. All the children who have only one don’t speak it. It is a difficult language for English speakers so that could be the reason.

Simonjt · 30/12/2021 10:31

@lightand

and what about books? have books in both languages? though I dont think there are that many baby books in the other country. But I dont know that for 100%. I do know that toys there are in short supply and poor quality.
Of course you would have books in both languages, you seem to be confused between country and language.
idontshareprimula · 30/12/2021 10:32

@lightand

For instance, I dont think he is currently very "chatty".

Over christmas, he had people from both nationalities in the same room[which wont happen that often]. If I was a young child, I would be confused by two languages at the same time, as well!

He's 7 months old. What should he be chatting about?
ChildrenGrowingUpTooFast · 30/12/2021 10:34

Books will depend on the language. As I don’t know what it is. Mine is hard to read so you won’t be able to pick it up just from reading with the child. Mine goes to Chinese school on Saturdays. DC1 has learned it for 4 years and don’t read well at all. DC2 is in her second year and only just start to learn really simple words like numbers, seasons, etc. (I realise I didn’t say it was Chinese being the minority language).

Okbye · 30/12/2021 10:35

I’m bilingual as is my son (my mum is Asian)

It’s definitely an advantage to learn different languages from childhood. I found growing up I would sometimes flit between both languages (and still do when I’m talking to my mum) but English was definitely stronger. My son is the same, English is absolutely number one but he understands and does talk a bit of the second language.

From my experience it didn’t affect my sons general talking, there’s only positives from having multiple languages - no negatives ☺️👍

Sgtmajormummy · 30/12/2021 10:35

My advice to a grandparent is just stick to your own language, books, songs, games and be as natural/tolerant as possible with the other. Just like any other grandchild.

At 7 months he’s still assimilating both languages so he may be a bit slower to speak. But then he’ll be flying.

Mistakes are bound to occur, but OPOL (one person one language) is usually considered the best way to act in a multilingual household.
Good luck, it’s a fascinating journey.

bonfireheart · 30/12/2021 10:36

I studied "bilingualism in young children" it's much much easier to learn different languages as a child, hearing it from those around you than as an adult. I grew up in a household where three languages including English were spoken interchangeably, sometimes in the space of one conversation. I grew up to study English at Masters level, didn't impact on me or my siblings. Most of my friends grew up like this. My mum could barely read English until we were much older. They just got on with it and it all worked out fine.
However, my nephew didn't start talking until he was 3, nothing to do with being brought up in a bilingual household.

What language is it? Can help you find books and toys.

Username7521 · 30/12/2021 10:37

Hi OP.
Bilingual family here.
What is that parents approach to language? Is it one parent one language? We find this approach in our house a bit tough as I don’t speak said other language.
Books, DVDs (basically everything) in both languages.
My DD didn’t speak late but her language acquisition in English is better than in the other language. But she goes through phases of preferring one over the other.
No, she doesn’t get confused.
Watching all the kids play together they use the language based on context.
DD goes to a bilingual school which also helps her be multicultural not just bilingual.

bonfireheart · 30/12/2021 10:37

Just read he is 7 months. Regardless of language I would be a bit freaked out if a 7 month year old was chatty. However, this is Mumsnet so he's probably looking to do his PhD soon.

SantiagoSky · 30/12/2021 10:40

It's important that parents consistently speak just one language to the child. Otherwise they can't distinguish between the languages. I was very worried about this too, but my child very naturally started to speak all the languages that were present in his surroundings. Some too longer than others. The first one will be the one he knows from nursery and from interacting with other kids.

Frazzled2207 · 30/12/2021 10:42

I was brought up fully bilingual. My dad spoke one language to me my mother the other.

Didn’t suffer at all in fact it’s a privilege to have been brought up speaking two languages without being conscious of learning. I went on to learn a third language to degree level.
I can think of no disadvantages only advantages

Quidity · 30/12/2021 10:43

I have many friends with bi or tri lingual children, usually with one parent one language but in the case of 1 trilingual family, 1 parent 1 language and the language of the country they live in.
The only difficulty I ever encountered was when the children were toddlers they might mix 2 or 3 languages together in one sentence. It never seemed to matter to their peers or family, just adults like us who could not speak one of the languages! But this evens out very quickly and the children speak whatever language is appropriate depending on context

Changelingbutonlyforme · 30/12/2021 10:44

What are you actually worried about OP? That your grandson will struggle to speak English? That he will struggle to speak at all? That speaking 2 languages will be bad for him in some way? Or that you will struggle to bond with him?

viques · 30/12/2021 10:47

If the child is growing up in the UK then in my experience English will eventually become the child’s dominant language. This is because there will be more exposure to English from radio, tv, films, casual conversation, English speaking friends, nursery and eventually school. In school English will be the language the child learns in , the language in which they develop a wider vocabulary, learn to access cues in reading, use and understand the technical language associated with science and maths, the language in which they learn to write expressively, write persuasively, to write accurate accounts and make coherent arguments.

It will require a lot of determination from parents and family to support the other languages so that they become more than a simple language used for family discussion. Reading, writing, determined vocabulary building, using adult syntax, it takes effort and often outside support like additional classes. For many parents it becomes too much and other languages sadly fall by the wayside as the child matures.

From your point of view speak to your grandchild in the language you normally use, what really hampers language development is a child hearing poor language models, whether from a parent whose second language is minimal but who feels they should use that language because it is the dominant one in the culture, or a well meaning grandparent who can only use baby talk. A child needs good language role models to develop an understanding of how language works, and it doesn’t actually matter which language provides the model as long as one of them does.

InTheLabyrinth · 30/12/2021 10:49

Kids instinctively seem to know who they can mix languages with, and who they can't.
So I get pure English, Dad gets a mixture but each sentence/conversation is generally in one language. Paternal grandparents get 90% minority language with bits of English where their vocab is lacking.

But each family is different about how they set about it. Do you speak the second language fluently? If not, stick with English.

Subtitles on the TV are the other way to get exposure to the written word. We stock up on visits abroad.

Are you prepared to share which language?

7 month olds don't talk.
DS1 was slow to talk. DS2 wasn't. I think they would gave been the same if they were monolingual or bilingual.

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