Help with NHS safeguarding complaint

[mindutopia]

I should probably NC for this, but can’t be asked (Dh’s family beware!). But MIL works for the NHS in an (adult) safeguarding role (working with vulnerable adults with mental health issues).

Several years ago, it came to light that MIL’s partner (now husband) is a child sexual offender. He sexually abused his quite vulnerable niece. The whole family believed him (except Dh and I and some of the cousins from our generation). He went to prison for several years and released back to MIL’s from prison. Sexual harm prevention order for 10 years. Dh and I had no idea (just thought he was a fucking weirdo!). In those 10 years MIL, facilitated contact between him and our dc (we we’re always quite careful so don’t believe our children were abused.) We are now NC.

But it has recently come to light that a younger, more vulnerable family member (who is technically an adult) but very controlled by her parents. Like literally she isn’t allowed to leave the house, is prevented from doing basic things like going to the shop for food or getting medical care.

I have a separate thread about supporting her. But I’ve been thinking a lot about MIL. She literally works in a safeguarding role. She has refused to acknowledge that her own partner is a paedophile.

So super hard to get her to see her own family abusing young person. This family member (who is 30) has emailed her many times o say she is afraid of her dad. This family member is begging for help. I am trying to help her (different thread), but…

Realistically is there somewhere I can report MIL? I’m still so pissed at her about the situation where she allowed a paedophile around our children. And now knowing she has ignored an adult who is struggling while WORKING IN AN ADULT SAFEGUARDING role.

I'm not sure there's any way ypu can report her.
I understand what and why you would be hopeful to report her to work but unless she had actively done something and you had proof there's no point.
Can you tackle it. From the viewpoint of reporting this adults parents or going through adult social services?

Thank you, I should have clarified that MIL and several other family members have been directly informed about the abuse. I generally take the stance that MIL can fuck right off. This is because she went to great lengths to knowingly expose our dc to a (convicted, known paedophile), She literally met with probation officers and his own mental health team and lied about his contact with our dc.

Anyway, all that aside, here is a 30 year old adult who has been quite open about being abused, restricted from bathing and having appropriate food. MIL who works in adult safeguarding ina mental health crisis team….has been mum as hell…

I have emails and text messages detailing the abuse (forwarded to me) and her partner’s contact with our dc despite sexual harm prevention order is quite obvious. 🙄

Your local safeguarding team at your local council, failing this, CQC.

Does she belong to a professional body? A nurse you can report to the nmc

Certainly in the first instance you can report to her direct employer

Honestly sounds like she has no business having the job she does!

Regarding the vulnerable adult being abused I'd report to both adult social services and police!

Can you report both instances to MASH.

Thank you, this is really helpful. Not sure what my next move will be, but after the past few years, I just feel really upset about the whole situation and want to make sure I consider all my options. I just feel so angry, after what all of us have gone through (I’ve experienced sexual abuse myself and the way she speaks about survivors of SA is awful). I want to just punch her in the face. I feel like if she can’t see it happening right under her feet in her own family, what else is she missing with her patients who are quite vulnerable?

Is she in a social worker role? I don't know about nurses but social workers have a duty to uphold the reputation of the profession even outside of work. Also, I think they must declare any previous or current contact with social services though am unsure if this is to their workplace or regulatory body, Social Work England.

She is a social worker, yes. I don’t know what if any professional bodies she is registered with. It’s come to light today in talking with other family members that it’s well known (except to Dh and I and the younger generation) that this auntie and her children have been abused for years and years. Not allowed food, not allowed to bathe regularly, the dad regularly locks them out of the house in the cold/overnight if he catches them going out anywhere. The mum is late 50s/early 60s and has been with him since her teens. The daughters are late 20s/early 30s. The family ‘knows’ but they don’t believe them (so typical of dh’s family 🙄). They will only superficially get involved. We have another family member who is a clinical psychologist in the NHS. She actually hasn’t known about the situation with the adults being abused (different part of the family really), but she did know about the sexual offender having contact with our children, knew MIL intentionally kept it a secret from us, and told me after that the family met to discuss how to make sure Dh and I didn’t find out so that we wouldn’t stop contact (the abuser in this instance abused another family member in his exes family, convicted, spent 3 years in prison, so very much a big deal). It just boggles the mind.

In the end, I imagine there is not much I can do that will make any real difference. I just feel so angry right now at everyone - but especially people who have safeguarding responsibilities professionally, I also have a career that involves adult safeguarding (in education though). It’s infuriating that they can just pretend they don’t need to get involved when horrible things are happening to people they claim to care about.

Oh if she's a social worker you can report her to Social Work England - she sounds like she's in violation of professional standards and basic codes of conduct. Sounds horrendous and as you've pointed out - how on earth can she safeguard others if she can't ger own family.

Report to Social Work England who are the regulatory body for social workers
You can also report her to your local authority LADO
Regarding the abuse of your husbands relatives you could report to adult MASH team in your council or pass them the details to report
This is presuming you are in England
Sounds awful hoping you get somewhere with this