What’s your family visit time limit?

[MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry]

How long can you cope with them visiting you/you visiting them for?

I’m a real introvert and really can’t relax with anyone in my house, I don’t have visitors often when visiting my parents we usually manage a couple of hours. Today was 3 hours. Luckily they live close so visits can be frequent and short rather than rare and long!

I read on MN of people travelling to stay with family for days or even a few weeks and the thought of it horrifies me.

We went to my in laws today and I managed 7 hours... I say managed but actually after 5 hours i was pretty agitated (raging)

I'm 7 months pregnant and spent the whole time running around after my3yo wishing I was anywhere else. With wine/not pregnant/child free I might have managed the full 7 hours smiling... not likely though.

I personally think I deserve a medal.

Could not stay with in laws for any longer.

Would happily stay over night with my own mum (but would visit others and she's not intrusive at all)
Could not last more than an afternoon with my dad.

I find threads like this pretty depressing. The thought that one day my kids might be saying to people they can’t stand to be around me for longer than 2 or 3 hours is quite sad.

It’s not a guarantee @Covidclaire. How do you feel about visiting your own parents? It’s natural personality dependant too. I can’t help being an introvert, I fought it for years but it’s how I am.

We’re happy to visit either my parents or PIL. Bit of a preference for them to visit us but only because packing is a bit of effort with small kids. For a usual Christmas we would have my parents stay with us for probably 3 nights then we would go to the in laws for 3 night but they both live 3+ hours drive away. When they come and stay through the year it’s usually at least 3 nights which I’m fine with.

My family - 48 hours
ILs - when FIL was alive it was 2 hours, but MIL is okay and when we stay with her we go out and do things, so I can manage a week!

In the days when I has inlaws, we did 4 hours tops with them on Boxing day.
It was a 2 hour drive there.
I've never had people stay with me, neither have I hosted.

2.5 hours is optimal at chritmas. Gives enough time for chit chat and a cup of tea, food and then a sit in front of the TV. My parents are coming for 4 hours today and I know that will feel too long.

We all live quite near to eachother so little and often is what we tend to do.

Covidclaire it's not that I can't stand to be around them, I love my family and they're great company but as an introvert I find socialising pretty knackering. We all enjoy our own company and immediate families. It's just what suits us.

We are at the other extreme compared with 3 hours earlier in the thread. We have family to stay from overseas for 2 -4 weeks. Otherwise, they can't really come over as flights are too expensive, the family members make it into their holiday.

To be honest, it isn't easy for me at times but i have learnt to adapt as i do love them and want to see them. I have workes on creating healthy emotional boundaries when physically we have to be in the same house/space for a long time, if that makes sense. I take physical space for myself when needed by quietly going to my bedroom/study sometimes for 30 minutes when i know i need space. I also take myself off once a week at least and see a friend for a coffee or something. This is something that i have learnt to do from doing this for about 10 years, we used to clash more.

It's ok but a bit tiring by the end as i try to host as well as i can. I enjoy a party and a busy house though most of the time so am not a real introvert which makes it easier, i suppose.

@Covidclaire

I find threads like this pretty depressing. The thought that one day my kids might be saying to people they can’t stand to be around me for longer than 2 or 3 hours is quite sad.

People can't help whether they're introverts or extroverts.

I'm quite happy to spend several days with my parents if we're out doing things, but not if we're stuck inside the same four walls all day long.

We're hosting my parents and in laws this yr. By the time they all bugger off it'll have been 6 days. Im finding it very stressful now and had a row with my husband about it in bed last night
I would never impose myself on anyone for this length of time

@MaryAndGerryLivingInDerry I think I'm quite introverted too though I can hide it well for a short time but it's exhausting.
My maximum with my parents is probably, ideally, 2-3 nights as long as it's at their house (quite a big house with plenty of space to be on your own). My house is small so 1 night is the max before we're all tripping over each other.
My MIL I can probably manage for 3 hours tops (yesterday was 3.5 and I was ready for home). She's dead on but would try to undermine me very quickly with my DS (ie DS messing about at the dinner table and her encouraging it so she's "fun"). I can't be bothered with being "the strict parent" for longer than 3 hours.